Across the Universe
by FaithfulKitten
Summary: This is my own cross over in a sense of Dollhouse and Buffy the vampire slayer. There is less to do with dollverse so i didn't make it a crossover. so summary is that Faith gets sent to the dollverse while she is in a coma. She comes back to help not by choice. Reviews make a difference feel free to do so. I actually picked this story back up because of a review so there!
1. Chapter 1

"Mr. Travers its Wesley. I have news regarding Faith. She is currently comatose at Sunnydale Hospital. As her guardian what would you like me to do?" Wesley took out a note pad in preparation for writing down any instructions.

"Interesting, is the other slayer still adamant about not working for the Council?"

"Yes sir. Our refusal to help the vampire has turned her against us."

"Well then it seems we have a greater need for the darker slayer. I had considered having her terminated but a new slayer would actually be rather inconvenient. The current potential that we have determined will be called is wilder if you can believe than the dark slayer. No I feel it will be easier to have her be rehabilitated and I have the perfect dimension in mind."

"Sir?" Wesley questioned wondering if he had heard correctly.

"I shall be in Sunnydale by tomorrow. Have her discharged by 1pm."

Staring at the phone Wesley listened to the dial tone for a couple of seconds before hanging it up. Taking a seat and pouring out a shot of brandy Wesley stared off into space and contemplated his options. There were few options laid before him. He could defy the Council and guard Faith however that option had several flaws the main being that he had no connections outside of the Council proper. If Faith were awake and stable both physically and mentally he thought he would try to defy the Council as it was he saw little he could actually do. He couldn't save her, not from the Council and not from herself.

Momentarily he considered recruiting the help of Giles and Buffy however that thought seemed ridiculous when he considered their animosity regarding the girl. Though Faith had failed to meet all his expectations he was now able to see that he had also failed hers. Looking at her lying so helplessly at the hospital had given him a strange sense of self recrimination. Faith had needed a more experienced watcher. He was loath to admit it but he was still too raw to be a watcher. He knew it was his father's position that had allowed him to be in charge of a slayer.

Finishing off his drink Wesley grabbed his coat and made the long walk to Sunnydale Hospital. From the hospital visitor's log he was the only one to visit Faith. She had been here for three days and none of the others had come to see her. He found it a bit disconcerting their lack of concern, especially in regards to Buffy.

Entering the hospital he searched out Dr. Ronston the resident in charge of Faith's case. The Dr. as usual had no news regarding her condition. She was the same as the day she had been brought to the hospital. She was still in critical care and still residing in the ICU. Pulling the Dr aside he made the arrangements for Faith's discharge.

"Dr. Ronston I would also like three vials of blood drawn. Our labs would like to do some of their own tests and I need to send the blood over before she is released." It was a blatant lie but he needed the blood. He had no idea which dimension the Council was sending Faith but he knew that he needed to keep some form of connection with her. Through blood her could bring her back if ever there was a need.

Receiving a nod from the Dr. Wesley made his way to Faith's room. The room was an austere white, no flowers, cards, or ornamentation littered the windows or tables. It was Spartan and serviceable. Faith remained in bed, a ventilation tube down her throat, an I.V in her arm and her eyes closed. She looked helpless, innocent. He wondered how long it had been since she was actually innocent. He wished he had taken the time to understand her before he had judged her. Then again as it is with all humans and their actions only hindsight is 20/20.

The file he had received regarding Faith was detailed and informative; however, it was unable to actually tell him about her mental and emotional state. By all accounts Faith had been an exemplary potential before her Watcher was murdered. She excelled at her studies, she remained isolated as deemed necessary by the Council, and she obedient. She was perfect especially when her childhood was put into consideration. Coming from a broken home Faith was taken into foster care at the age of ten. At the age of 12 she was adopted by her Watcher Ellen Stanton. Her watcher was very detailed on training methods, methods of discipline, and educational programs. However again there was nothing about Faith's family life, how she reacted to being taken away, how she felt about being adopted. For all that Faith's life was documented thoroughly there was so much about the actual girl that was missing.

Taking a seat he studied Faith waiting for the nurse to come in and draw her blood. He wasn't sure what was driving him to do what he was doing but he knew he had too. Something in his guts clenched in remorse when it came to Faith. That same feeling told him that he needed to keep something that would connect him to Faith.

The nurse entering broke him of his reverie. In minutes he was presented with three vials of Faith's blood in a small sealed bag. Sliding them into his pocket he thanked the nurse. Taking one last long look at Faith he walked out of the room and back towards his small apartment. He's thoughts shifting back and forth between the young slayer and the possible futures the Council had in store for him. The Council had a variety of dimensions to choose from but they would all require the use of the Coven, the whole Coven. Quentin unfortunately had their ear and their cooperation.

Tomorrow he would try to question Mr. Travers a little further. Tomorrow with a bit of luck he would learn about the fate they had in store for Faith. However, he knew it was pointless to worry over it until the time came. Tomorrow was enough for now. Entering his apartment Wesley divested himself of his clothes and slid into bed. For all that he had not done much he felt extremely tired.


	2. Chapter 2

"Mr. Langton, it is a pleasure to see you again." Quentin Travers greeted while extending his hand.

"Mr. Travers." Langton spoke brusquely his displeasure clear.

"I have a new member for you. She is very dear to us and we need several changes to be made in her personality." Quentin began only to be interrupted.

"You know that we do not change people, not without their consent. We run a volunteer program Mr. Travers."

"Yes that is what you like to call it isn't it? However, you will do this for me. This young woman as I said before is very special to me. Sadly she has suffered several severe psychological and emotional traumas. I merely wish those things to be removed. I would like her to have the mentality of her age with only memories up until she was 15 ½. I fear the last year of her life has been rather difficult if her current situation is enough to judge by. She got herself involved with the wrong people and went down the wrong path. I am here to have you correct that path." Seeing only a vague interest spark Mr. Langton's eye Quentin decided to continue.

"We are waving the normal amount you give at the end of the five year volunteer term. Instead we will be paying her that amount. As you would normally do we have already cleared all trouble she has had with the law and trust me it was difficult to do. Here is her personal file with all major life events recorded. In this folder you will find her license, passport, and birth certificate along with the bank routing number, and a bank card. We have done all the work and only require that you leave her in the state we requested when her term is over."

Mr. Langton stared blatantly at Quentin Travers. There was something he didn't like about the man yet it seemed pointless to refuse a gift of sorts out of hand. Walking up to the young woman in the hospital bed he took a close look at her. She was beautiful even in her current state. He could tell that her hair once washed would be a gorgeous chestnut color, her skin was clear though slightly pale, her body was toned though he could tell she was very slowly losing weight and muscle mass. He knew his people could help her, if she was indeed as disturbed as Travers stated.

Turning his attention back to Travers and his small group he nodded his head. Unlike what Mr. Travers wanted he would wake have her woken up before he had her sent off. He wanted her to know and understand what she had become involved in. He felt that she needed to understand what was to become of her. Turning away from Travers and his group he silently dismissed them. Walking over to his desk he ordered his secretary to call in a team and have her brought down to research.

Leaving the young woman behind Langton picked up her files and walked into his private chambers to read. For the first time in a long time he was curious about one of the people he was taking on.

Faith Lehane born December 14, 1984 6lbs 5ozs, brown hair, brown eyes

Mother: Eloisa Johanna Kinston

Father: James Arnold Lehane

Potential was removed from parental custody due to signs of physical and emotional abuse along with signs of negligence. Potential was taken into foster care for two years, sent to six different families. Potential shows increasing levels of aggression towards authority figures and male authority figures specifically. Potential was adopted by Ms. Ellen Stanton when Potential was 12 years of age. Ms. Stanton reports that Potential is progressively accepting authority though balks at physical discipline. Potential shows progress academically, IQ score of 135 she is considered gifted, educational methods have been altered to maximize potential. Potential loses guardian at age 15 ½, Ellen Stanton is brutally murdered in front of Potential. Potential relocates to California. Potential suffers with the inability to socialize with other peers due to years of isolation. Potential shows a massive deterioration of morals. Potential shows an increase in sexual aggressiveness. Potential kills another human being. Potential is hired as an assassin and thug. Potential is stabbed and falls off a roof. Potential is comatose.

Langton read the details of Faith Lehane's life and felt that the majority of lacked any information on the young woman's mental and emotional state of mind. The idea that Faith was referred to merely as Potential was odd and disturbing. He couldn't help but feel that throughout a large portion of Faith's life she was merely property.

"Boyd there you are." Ambrose walks in making Langton look up in mild surprise.

Looking at his partner Boyd Langton considered his options. Not many people in his company knew he existed. He was the silent partner but the controlling one. Ambrose was the front, the façade behind which he hid his existence the majority of the time. The new Ambrose was free of ambition, initiative, and a sharp nose for business. The new Ambrose was simply the mask of the Rossum Corporation.

"Ambrose make sure the girl in my office has all the regular tests done and request that Dr. Bennett work to wake her up from her coma." The command was simple and a clear dismissal.

Shaking his head at the sharp dismissal Ambrose turned around and made his way to the office. There he found the girl in question. After a quick look over her he was a bit impressed. The Dollhouses around the world all had beautiful women; he had used enough of them to have exquisite taste in them. This girl was a beauty and she would easily become a highly requested doll. Making the proper arrangements for the girl he made his way to his own office and the delectable piece of tail he had left waiting for him.


	3. Chapter 3

Faith woke up lying in a hospital bed with monitors surrounding her. The constant beeping was comforting in a way. It reminded her that she was alive, that she had survived. She wasn't sure whether or not to be happy about being alive. She had expected to die on that roof top, in a way she had even wanted to. Lying still she tried to remember everything that happened. She remembered poisoning Angel, Buffy coming after her for the cure, and then the fight. The fight stuck out in her mind. She wondered if Buffy realized that she threw the fight. She wondered if Buffy even cared. Looking around the room she knew that she was in a hospital. The lack of flowers or cards told her better the words that Buffy and her little friends didn't care what happened to her.

Taking a closer look at her body she could tell that she had lost a little weight, not much maybe a couple of pounds. Her skin tone also told her that she had been unconscious for at least a week maybe two. She was pale; she would even go so far to say that she was pasty. Flexing her arms Faith slowly stretched out her body trying to readjust to her body. She was sore but she knew that with a bit of walking she would limber up. Pulling out the IV and taking out the heart monitors she listened to the monitors panic. Within minutes a mass of strangers had entered her room in a panic. Looking around at everyone she confirmed that she didn't recognize anyone.

"Call Mr. Ambrose and tell him that Ms. Lehane has woken up." A young woman with dark soulful eyes spoke to a young man making him run off to do her bidding. "Ms. Lehane I'm Dr. Bennett, I've been working on your brain and the damage that you suffered from your fall. Mr. Ambrose will be meeting with you undoubtedly in a couple of minutes and he will explain everything."

With that said the young Dr and all her attendants walked out without another word. Sitting up in bed Faith stared at the door in a mixture of confusion and shock. She wondered where exactly she was and why she needed an explanation. For the first time in a long time Faith was content to sit and wait. She was curious and realized that in her weakened state she had a better chance of learning about what was going by waiting then by fighting.

Getting up Faith looked down her leg and saw the catheter bag. The mere sight of it made her a little uncomfortable. It implied that she had been vulnerable, that she was still in fact rather vulnerable. It was a feeling she hated one she had always hated. Shifting her attention away from the bag she began to slowly stretch. Her muscles were tight with lack of use and movement.

Hearing footsteps approaching her room Faith returned to bed but remained sitting. Staring at the door she watched a tall black man with brown eyes, and nearly black hair walk into her room. His face was warm and gave the appearance that he could be trusted, that he would help. Relaxing her stance a little she watched him pull up a chair and sit down directly in front of her.

"Hello Faith my name is Boyd Langton. I bet you have a lot of questions. Let me begin by explaining where you are. This is one of Rossum's research facilities; we are a corporation that does biological, chemical, and genetic research. One day we will change the world. Now the reason you are here is because Quentin Travers brought you to me. He has enlisted you in our Dollhouse program. Now the reasons he did that are not fully clear to me however your past does make you a perfect candidate. We have done some tests on you and have found that you are perfect in other ways as well. However that will come about much later. This may be hard to hear but you have been given into our care for the next five years. Once your time is done you are free to go in every way. Your record will be cleared including your two murder charges and you will be financially compensated as well. I just wanted you to know what is in store for you for the next couple of years. Now I've decided to put you with the L.A branch. Adele DeWitt is head of that house. I've had her called over to pick you up and explain the basics to you along with showing you the house. The nurse will be in once I leave to help get you ready. I promise I'll keep a very close eye on you." Boyd gave Faith's hand a small pat in reassurance before getting up and walking away.

Staring at the chair that Boyd had recently vacated Faith wondered if she was actually awake or if all of this was merely a bad dream. Giving herself a hard pinch Faith admitted that yes in fact she was awake and everything she had just heard was true. The fact that the Council had given her away to a corporation like she was a piece of property or furniture was shocking to say the least. Since she had learned she was a potential she realized that she was nothing but a tool. She had been taught that she was an extension of the Council and must always do their bidding. After Ellen died she had rebelled and the only thing it had gotten her was a coma and sent to corporation to become something akin to a slave from what she had heard. It seemed the Council had signed her life away without her knowledge or her consent.

Resting her head in her hands Faith considered what to do. Part of her wanted to continue her rebellion. Wanted to show the Council that she was not furniture; to be moved and given away. Yet another part of her recognized that she had been out maneuvered and defeated. The Council had clearly posed no objections to Buffy trying to kill her for her blood. It was clear to her that if she was not going to be of use then she would be used. She also had a clear understanding of what the Council normally did to rogue slayers and she was clearly considered at rogue. If this was how the Council wanted her to be rehabilitated then this was how she would go. She could only assume that it was better than the Council's usual methods which normally involved less rehabilitation and more termination. She knew the history of the Council and their treatment of their slayers, none of it was particularly pleasant.

A young nurse entering the room broke her of her reverie. Within moments the nurse had her lying back and was between her legs to remove the catheter. It was mildly humiliating but she had been through worse more than once. The pull and slight pain was enough to tell her that the catheter had been in for a while. It would be hell to retrain her bladder. Releasing a sigh of relief when she was able to close her legs Faith let the nurse help her up and to the bathroom. Doing her best she ignored the woman as she tried to use her bowels. She knew it would be a couple of days before she had completely retrained her body.

Once she was done the nurse directed her to a shower. Faith watched as the nurse took out a couple of towels and laid out a set of clothes. Looking over the clothes she found a simple pair of black yoga pants and a red tank top with a black cotton jacket. The nurse coming behind her and helping her remove her hospital gown made her jump. Letting the nurse disrobe her, Faith entered the shower and adjusted the water to the perfect temperature. She was surprised again when the nurse began to wash her hair and soap her body. Shutting her eyes Faith just did her best to ignore what was happening. She wished everything was just a dream. She wished that she would wake up and be back in Boston with Ellen.

Getting out of the shower Faith let the nurse help her dry off and get dressed. She was directed back to bed to rest. She even felt tired. It was amazing that after sleeping for so long her body was still exhausted. Laying back down Faith let her mind slowly process everything that had happened in a matter of an hour maybe two. Who know that the world would be upside down when she woke up? Feeling the shadows creep closer Faith closed her eyes and let oblivion take her away.


	4. Chapter 4

Taking the three vials of blood out of his safe Wesley wondered if his plan was going to work. The Council was gone and they had failed to bring Faith back. Now she was his only hope to save Angel. Pocketing the vials he made his way back to the Hyperion. All the materials were already bought and all that was left was doing the spell.

Entering the hotel Wesley searched out Lorne. For two days he had researched how to bring Faith back. Now all that was left was actually casting it. He knew that tearing through the folds of time and space was dangerous. At best they would bring Faith back. At worst they would drag something from a different dimension. Either way it was dangerous.

Giving the blood to Lorne he started setting up. Placing five candles at the five points he set the specified herbs next to each one. Putting out his hand he silently asked for the first vial of blood. Removing the cap he slowly dripped out the first vial making the first half of his pentagram. Taking the second vial he created the rest of the pentagram.

"So you're sure this is a good idea? I mean from what you have told me this Faith girl doesn't exactly sound like the pinnacle of sane."

Looking up at Lorne he wondered what to say. Faith had her moments. She had done wrong by the people who she was supposed to protect. Then again they had wronged her just as badly. "She made a mistake and she paid for it. Killing Mr. Finch was an accident. The rest was nothing more than a girl who was lost and confused taking the only road she thought was left to her. We left Faith alone for too long. We asked that she trust us when we never trusted her. We failed her in more ways than she ever failed us. She will help us, she will prove herself if we just give her a chance. Plus I promised her that one day I would bring her back. I have to try. Now that the Council is gone no one else will."

Turning his attention back to the spell Wesley places the last vial to burn in a large oil burner. Gathering his thoughts Wesley begins the spell. "As blood is life, as blood is sustenance, as blood flows let blood cal to blood. Open the veils of time tear through the walls of worlds. Blood calls to blood, flesh calls to flesh. Open, tear and come forth. Follow the blood to where you belong." The blood begins to boil, the lights flicker and shut off. As the earth begins to shake Wesley fears he has done something wrong. A flash of light drags his attention to the ceiling; a portal slowly rips open the fabric of his world and dumps forth a body. The body crashing onto his pentagram causes the blood to splash him and Lorne. The light coming back on reveals Faith.

Looking around him he sees that everyone minus Cordelia has rushed downstairs to know what the commotion is. Looking back at Faith he sees her shake her head and look around. Her face tells him she is confused. Worrying about whether or not he has made a mistake he calls her name. "Faith?"

Faith stares at the man to her left trying to figure out how he knows her name. How he knows her real name. He looks like Senator Perrin but something about him, his accent tells her she knew this man. That once in a life she hasn't led in a very long time he meant something to her. Digging through her memories, separating them from the others she picks out his name. Turning her attention onto the other people in the room she spots someone else she recognizes. Dr. Saunders, or Whiskey the others she doesn't recognize. Studying everyone closely she asks the most important question. "Who the fuck are you people?"

"Faith its Wesley, I used to be your watcher." Senator Perrin tells her or Wesley as he is now called.

Looking at Whiskey she moves her head in question. The woman in question speaks up. "I'm Fred I work here with Angel. This is Gunn and that's Lorne and that's Connor." Fred says making the introductions.

Pulling herself into a sitting position Faith wonders why Wesley of all people would be calling her back. Why Wesley is working with Angel for that matter. Taking her time looking around her environment Faith pulls out a small pouch that she has kept next to her body for the last 10 years. It's still with her.

She can still remember like it was yesterday the day Adele gave her the documents in the pouch. Her birth certificate, her license, her passport, and the freedom the Council had guaranteed her along with funds. She was finally back home and yet it felt wrong. She felt as if she no longer belonged here. She wished she didn't belong here. For 10 years she had fought for humanity and finally she had found peace. Here in this world she knew there was no such thing. In this world she was the Slayer. She carried the line of Slayers and only in death would she ever find peace.

"Why have you brought me back Wesley?" She asked curious. She knew that he would never call her unless there was a reason. She had been told by Boyd that Quentin had given her into his care. She knew that no one here had stood up for her, had tried to stop him.

"Angel is gone and Angelus is wreaking havoc around the city. He has teamed up with a demon called the Beast. The Beast blocked out the sun and we have been living in chaos since. We need you to help us get Angel back." Wesley told her a note of pleading tingeing his voice.

"I see. Why didn't you call Buffy?"

"Buffy is having problems in Sunnydale we don't think she can drop everything and come help us."

"So you brought me." She states simply. Looking up at Wesley she asks the most important question. "Did you ever think that I might not want to be called back here? Did you ever think that I might have finally found a place where I belonged? That I might have found friends or a home? I have fought for 10 years to save the world and I finally did. Now you bring me back to a place where the only bit of peace I might ever find is in the grave, when I die."

Wesley looked shocked and contrite. He hadn't thought of what Faith might be feeling or of what she wanted. He could excuse his actions by telling himself that there was no way to know. Yet he couldn't he refused to make excuses to Faith. He had done that before and it had led to nothing but pain and misery for everyone.

"No I didn't think and for that I am sorry. I need, we need, your help. But the main reason I summoned you forth is because the Council is gone. They no longer exist and thus are no longer able to bring you back. When they took you away I promised I would bring you back if they couldn't." Wesley reached out laying his hand lightly on her arm in supplication.

Looking closely at Wesley, Faith does her best to forgive him. A part of her knew that one day she would have to come back. Yet the hope that she once had for home was gone. It had died as she waited 10 years to be returned. It had withered as she was forced to kill human after human in her efforts to save the world. Rossum had created chaos but it had not fixed it, she and the rest of the gang had. The knowledge that she would never see her friends again slowly pressed like dead weight against her chest.

Shaking her head in a vain hope to loosen her heavy thoughts Faith turned her attention back to the situation at hand. "Alright I'll help you. Give me a report of the last couple of weeks. I also want to know the basic information about each of these individuals." She said pointing in the general direction of Gunn, Fred, Lorne and Connor. "Then I need a shower, a change of clothes and some weapons."

Nodding his head Wesley stood up and waited until Faith did the same. Leading her upstairs he began explaining. He told her how long she had been gone, what Angel was doing in L.A, and everything he knew about the others. The verbal dossier was a little overwhelming but she took it all in stride. Entering a room she found a set of clothes that she knew without a doubt had been in her closet in Sunnydale. Looking over at Wesley she silently questioned him with her eyes.

"Ah yes your clothes. Well no one else was willing to or wanted to go to the apartment the mayor had given you. I felt that one day you might want your things so I collected your clothes and personal items and put it in storage. I grabbed those clothes out a couple of days ago in case you might need them." Wesley said quickly looking away from Faith.

Taking a closer look at Wesley she marveled at how much he had changed from the man she once knew. The Wesley she knew would never have done such a thing. The Wesley she knew didn't care about her, considered her to be nothing but an extension of the Council. This Wesley was different and she wasn't sure whether or not that was a good thing.

Nodding her head in thanks Faith grabbed a pair of leather pants, a t-shirt, socks, underwear, and boots before making her way to the bathroom. Taking a quick shower Faith did her best to focus on the current situation and not on everything she had just lost. Paul, her lover, her friend, her comrade in arms was dead. The loss was so recent she hadn't even had time to absorb it before she had been dragged back home. She resented the fact that she wasn't able to say goodbye to her friends. Most of all she resented the fact that she didn't even have time to mourn the loss of the man she had fallen in love with.

Getting out and changing Faith made her way back downstairs. The little group was assembled again and she wondered if they had been standing there the whole time. "Weapons?" She asked Wesley and waited for him to guide her to their weapons room.

Going down to the basement of the hotel she saw a variety of weapons lined on a table, in a chest, and some hanging on a wall. She was impressed she had to admit it. However, there was something very important missing; guns. What she wanted more than anything at the moment were a couple of guns. Sure they didn't kill vampires but she didn't want to kill Angel. A gun would hurt like the dickens and incapacitate him long enough for her to get him back to the hotel. This was a retrieval mission after all.

Sighing at the lack of firepower Faith took a good look and made her selections; a tranquilizer gun, a crossbow, two knives, one stake, and a short sword. Walking back upstairs ignoring Wesley following her she laid out the weapons on the counter and looked at the rest of the people in the room. Her verbal dossier had given her the basics on the little gang and now she needed to select her back up. Sadly the only people she had backing her up were people she didn't particularly trust. It was never a good combination.

"Alright then here is how it's going to go. This is a bag and tag mission. I would normally go solo on this considering I don't trust a single person in this room. However, I don't really know the lay of the land here, nor do I really have a means to track Angelus down. So that leaves all of you to help me out." Handing out the weapons to Gunn, Wesley, and Conner she continued. "Now kid since you have some sort of connection to your old man I need you to help me find him. The rest of you are back up."

"Why should I help you?" Connor asked his resentment at being told what to do showing clearly in his aggressive stance.

"Kid I'm sorry you really don't know me and honestly I don't know you. If you did know me you would know that I am not the type of person you fuck around with. You don't have to like what I tell you to do, but you will do it. I can make you do it or you can do it on your own. Trust me, you don't want me to make you do it." She told him getting into his face. She was in no mood to play games with a overly rebellious teenager.

"Faith there is no need for violence Connor is more than willing to help." Wesley stepped in between them afraid of what Faith might do.

"Let's go." Faith said turning around and making her way out of the hotel.

Walking through the streets of L.A with Conner leading the way wasn't Faith's idea of a good time. Part of her was curious if the boy was just leading them on a wild goose chase. Years of tracking and fighting had made her something of an expert at finding people. Sadly it was a little harder to find a vampire especially since it had been ten years since she had even seen one let alone tracked one.

Again she wondered why she cared. Why she was willing to help this little gang of misfits find their pet vampire. Looking through years of memories to find the ones containing Angel gave her no inducement to help the vampire. Yet knowing that he was a champion of good reminded her that she did in fact need to help him. The side of good needed as many fighters as it could stand.

Walking down a dark alley with Conner still in the lead Faith let her senses out. They were out of practice and it felt overwhelming to tap into the part of her abilities. The slayer inside her had been put to sleep and it was only waking up now. Feeling a slight shiver run up her spine she wondered if it was a vampire or just a natural reaction to walking down a dark alley with strangers for back up.

A vampire popping out of nowhere and lunging at Conner told her it was her slayer senses coming back to life. Before she was able to react Conner decapitated the vampire. Releasing a sigh of annoyance Faith was mildly tempted to beat the living crap out of the teenager. She hated working with morons and suddenly she felt as if she was surrounded by them.

"Conner go home." Faith says with an annoyed sound looking at the boy in disappointment.

"No" Conner states emphatically shaking his head. "That vamp attacked me I was only defending myself."

"No you weren't, you thought it was Angel and you were hoping to kill him in the heat of the moment and not get in trouble for it. I get it I really do and I might have done the same thing. That's the reason why I know it was intentional and that's the reason why you have to go home."

"You can't make me and you can't find him without me."

Deciding she has had enough of the over opinionated young man Faith levels her crossbow at him. "Do you know how many humans I have killed?" Seeing the frightened shake of the boys head she continues. "I've killed hundreds. Do you think I have any qualms about killing you? I don't know you. I don't care about you. Honestly I don't think I would recognize you from a hole in the wall. Now do you really want to test whether or not I am willing to kill you?" Seeing the boy shake his head again Faith smiled. "Good now Gunn please escort Conner home." She said taking the tranq gun and handing it to Wesley.

Watching the two members of his gang walk away Wesley turned to Faith and asked the obvious question. "So how do we find Angelus now?"

"The good old fashioned way." Faith states before moving on. If Conner was actually leading them in the right direction and Angelus had been in the vicinity recently then it went without saying that he would be within a couple of miles of their current location.

Letting her senses feel out through the allies Faith walked on hoping that Angelus would eventually ping on her radar. The only thing she had on her side was the element of surprise and she wasn't going to squander it.

Walking towards a dilapidated building Faith felt her senses scream that there was something powerful and dangerous inside the building. Motioning towards the roof Faith leads Wesley up a fire escape and onto the roof. "You stay here, stay low, and try not to get seen by anything. I'm going down there to do a little recon."

Climbing through a sky light Faith carefully lowered her body onto a metal landing that wrapped around the building. Keeping her ears open for any sound Faith heard voices, two specifically, both male. Carefully and quietly she crept closer. Going down a set of stairs she prayed that nothing creaked or moaned under her weight. Finally getting closer to the two voices Faith peaked over the edge before moving back and out of sight. Her quick peak had shown a large brute of a demon with horns, and a rough stone like skin. It was clear as day that the demon below was the dreaded Beast Wesley had spoken about. The other was a vampire he was tall, black hair, pale, and wearing a large about of leather. She presumed it was Angel. It took a moment of searching through her memories for a picture of him.

Hearing Angel's derision and talk of a knife Faith looks over the railing again. Finding the knife in question lying on a crate Faith looks at it before shifting back into the darkness and up to the roof. Looking at Wesley she motions him to the edge of the roof and grabs the tranq gun. Letting her sense guide her she feels Angelus walk out of the building, taking aim she fires one shot hitting Angelus dead on in the back. Reloading she watches as Angelus falls to the ground without a sound and takes another shot.

"Get down there and take him back to the hotel. I'm going after the Beast."

"Faith wait how am I supposed to get him back to the hotel?"

Looking at her ex-watcher Faith bites down on a curse before shaking her head. "Fine get him at least down the alley and into a dumpster, just make sure he is knocked out and out of sight. Once I kill the Beast I'll be down to help you."

Getting back into the building Faith watches as a rather rotund woman walks away from the Beast. Again holding back a curse at missing something obviously important Faith waits for her chance. Positioning herself close to the knife which upon closer inspection looks more like a dagger Faith waits. Watching the Beast move further away from the dagger Faith leaps down. Her landing isn't as graceful as she would have liked and the Beast finally senses her. She hears him roar in anger as she picks up the dagger. It's heavier than she had suspected it would be and in seconds the Beast is on her.

Feeling the massive weight of the demon crash into her she shifts the dagger. The weight of the Beast as he lands on top of her does all the work. The dagger slides through the rock like skin. Feeling heat suddenly coming from the demon on top of her Faith shoves him away and pulls herself as far away as possible. Watching in fascination the Beast slowly breaks apart with an inner fire. A beam of fire shoots up through the roof and Faith releases a sigh of relief that the demon is gone.

Getting up off the floor Faith makes her way out of the building and searches for Wesley. She nearly laughs as she finds him struggling desperately to get Angelus into a dumpster and failing miserably. "Forget it Wesley." She says walking over and helping the ex watcher pick Angelus back up. Carrying the vampire between them they make their way back to the hotel in silence.

Entering the hotel with Angelus hanging limply between them Faith called out for Gunn. "Grab some shackles, preferably metal and for both hands and feet." She watched as he ran for them, Fred following to help. Conner ran down the stairs starring in shock at his father.

"You caught him; I can't believe you caught him."

"Yeah well you're not the only person who knows how to track." Faith said unable to suppress the slight smirk at the young man's surprise.

Dragging the vampire downstairs Faith shackled both feet and wrists before a wrapping two chains around Angel's waist and attaching them to two different rings embedded into the wall. "I think that's the best we can do at the moment. If he wakes up we give him another dose until we can figure out what to do with him." Faith said starring at the vampire before turning around and walking out of the cage and locking the door behind her. Looking over at Gunn and Wesley she motioned for them to go back upstairs.

"So the real question becomes what happens now?" Faith asks moving to a chair and taking a seat.

"I don't know, honestly I didn't think we were even going to be able to get him. I mean all of this was a lot easier than I thought it would be." Wesley said with a slight surprised smile.

"Well until you figure it out I'll take first watch, Gunn takes second, and Wesley you take third." Faith said getting back up and going back towards the basement.

"What about me?"

"I don't want you anywhere near him Conner. I've got a niggling feeling that you are more likely to kill him than help him." Faith said turning away from the angry boy and walking back downstairs.


	5. Chapter 5

Getting into bed after hours spent watching Angelus; Faith released a sigh of relief. She had enough company inside her head to keep her entertained while watching Angelus. However, it was that entertainment that again left her puzzled in how to cope with this new world; well in reality it was her old world wasn't it? How odd to feel as if she didn't belong in the one place where she did in fact belong.

Closing her eye's she relaxed and let the minutes tick by and the silence fill not only the room but her mind. In that silence she finally found the bit of peace she needed to pitch over the edge of awake to asleep.

_Pachelbel's Canon in D started and the rows of people stood and turned to watch her walk down the aisle. Her dress was a traditional ball gown dress in white. There were white pearls sewn into the waist and trailing down the front of her dress. Her hair was up yet leaving a trail down her right shoulder curling like a tail just below the front of her gown. Her makeup was light, highlighting her natural beauty. The veil was sheer and made of silk. It was her perfect day._

_Walking down the aisle she had eyes only for the man standing at the end. The man she loved more than anyone else in the world; Martin Klar, her future husband and the biggest arms dealer on the west coast. Standing up next to him on the alter she listened to the priest and looked over to her husband to be smiling softly. _

_The vows were spoken, the words were said, and then they were man and wife. Smiling at the cheers from the guests she kissed her husband and let him lead her down the aisle. The single women gathered cheering and begging for their chance to catch the bouquet. Turning around she three the collection of roses and baby's breath into the air and back. The cheers and squeals of laughter peaked as the bouquet fell and one lucky woman caught it. _

_Feeling Martin pull her towards the reception area she smiled and left the crowd behind. Greeting and thanking everyone for coming she welcomed them to sit down and enjoy a bite to eat. Finally all the guests seated she joined Martin at the head table and ate, listened to the toasts, and smiled. _

_The meal over and the music started again calling all couples to the dance floor. She marveled at how beautiful the whole event turned out to be. Martin was truly perfect. He had made her wedding absolutely everything she had ever dreamed it would be. _

_Wrapping her arms around his neck they slowly danced, talking softly and enjoying each moment in each others embrace. _

_"Roma Klar" He said with a smile. "Mrs. Roma Klar"_

_"I thought you were keeping your first name." She joked. _

_They laughed and continued to twirl together on the dance floor. _

_"It's unbelievable."_

_"What?"_

_"I found the woman of my dreams. You'll meet her later on tonight, she's lovely." He chuckled making her smile and laugh. The moment got serous so after, he looked deep into her eyes and smiled softly. _

_"I found the thing that everyone spends their lives thinking they are going to find or grieving that they haven't. She's in my arms. She's mine. And all I can think about is that I'm going to step on her feet. I'm practically paralyzed. We should have taken those lessons." He smiled pulling her close but keeping an eye out for her toes. "I don't want us to have a wedding story where I step all over your feet." He laughed giving her a kiss. _

_"It'd relieve the pressure." She said looking down to her feet. "Seriously these heels are insane." _

_"Take them off." He whispered._

_"When it's time." _

_"Oh it's time, it's past time." He said leaning down to whisper into her ear. "Can I wish everyone away?" He asked looking around at all the dancing couples. _

_"No, it's my wedding day and I never want it to end...until my wedding night." She smiled whispering the last part into his ear. _

_Finally the party came to an end. The guest left and the couple where left to retire to their rooms. Smiling up into her husband's face she kissed him before turning around to let him take off her dress. She felt every touch, every caress as he slowly unbuttoned the gown. Raining kisses onto her shoulder and neck he let her dress drop to the ground. Leaving her in the white corset and stocking. _

Faith woke up the picture of Martin's face imprinted in her mind. Her memories, the memories of the people inside her, always came out in her sleep. She relived them each night and she wasn't sorry for it. Yet they made her wonder what her life would be like when she aged to the point that she no longer had control of her mind, of the people who were a part of her.

Getting up Faith walked over to the bathroom and took another shower. Walking out of the bathroom she grabbed a set of clothes out of the closet and got dressed. Looking at the clock she realized that Wesley's shift had just started. She had 8 hrs of free time before it was her turn to watch Angelus again.

Walking downstairs she was surprised to see a stranger. Making her way down the stairs she looked closely at the stranger who was standing next to Fred looking over some books. For some reason the girl looked familiar. She had auburn hair bordering on red, pale with a sprinkling of freckles. She was clearly powerful; there was something about her that set Faith's senses on edge. She wasn't sure what it was but she knew the girl was powerful.

"Faith!" Fred said upon spotting the slayer. "Do you know Willow?"

"I think I do, something says, that I do but it has been a while." Faith said starring at the young woman in front of her for a couple of minutes. Shifting through her memories Faith called up the woman in front of her. She was younger than, young and foolish. They all were back then. It seemed like a lifetime ago and she supposed it was several considering all the people inside her head. She remembered how jealous and petty the woman in front of her had once been. It was clear she had matured but she wondered if the old hatred and jealousy still lingered.

"Willow...it's been a long time. How are you?" She asked taking a seat slightly away from the young woman.

"Faith I'm guessing you're the one who helped capture Angelus. Where have you been these last couple of years?" Willow asked with sincere curiosity.

"Oh you know spending my time being rehabilitated in a different dimension. Wesley brought me back the other day. How have things been with you?"

"Same and different, you know saving the world, going evil, killing a man and trying to destroy the world. Just the usual things you know?" Willow said with a self deprecating smirk.

"So you've kept yourself busy I see."

"You know we could actually use your help back in Sunnydale if you are up to it." Willow said hoping the other slayer would be willing to come and give them a hand.

"Ah I see I'm back in that role all over again. Strange I suppose we always go back to the same roles. Sure Willow when we finish up here with Angel I'll come down and give you all a hand. I just need to go out and get some things and check some things out." Faith said getting up and walking downstairs to check on Wesley and Angelus.

"Looks like I'll be going back to Sunnydale when this is all over. Seems they are having some trouble as well. I guess you brought me back just in time to help save the world. How's the vamp doing?" She asked looking at the incapacitated vampire. She wondered how much of the tranquilizer they had given the vampire and if it would have any adverse effects. She didn't particularly care if it did but a part of her figured she should care, at least a little bit.

"He's fine, the drugs are working pretty well and every couple of hours we shoot him again just in case. I heard someone arrive who was it?"

"Willow, I guess she is here to re-ensoul Angel. I suppose she is the best person to do the job since she is the only person who has done it before."

"I suppose you are right. How are you doing? Are you okay with Willow being here?"

"I'm fine; it's hard to hold a grudge against people you haven't seen in a decade. I've changed and I would think they have as well. I figure I'll do my job, I'll help them out and then I'll go on my own way." She said starring at Angel before looking at Wesley. "Can I get you anything? I'm going out for a while, I have some things I need to check out and something's I need to get before I go to Sunnydale."

"No I'm fine thank you though."

Faith smiled before going back upstairs and out of the hotel. Walking around for a while she took out her documents and looked for the bank where her money was supposedly being held. Looking at her bank card she saw the name 'Wells Fargo'. Walking around she finally found one and went straight to the desk to see if she did indeed have an account.

"Hi can I help you?" A slightly balding man asked.

"I think you might just be able to do that. My name is Faith Lehane and I just wanted to check up on my accounts."

"Alright just have a seat and I will take a look."

She did as she was told and gave the banker her bank card, license and her check book. Waiting as patiently as possible while he typed everything into the computer Faith was trying to be optimistic.

"Well Ms. Lehane as of this moment you have six million, three hundred and fifty seven thousand, two hundred and twenty three dollars and thirty seven cents in your account." The banker told her while printing out a statement.

Faith stared at the man with her mouth hanging slightly ajar. She couldn't help the natural pessimism that had set in when it came to the Council. She had never thought that they would actually have paid her for her time with the Dollhouse. It was a surprise and it was a very pleasant one at that. Smiling uncontrollably at the banker she thanked him for his time before shaking his hand and making her way back out to the streets of Los Angeles.

Deciding she had the day to herself, or at least another six hours of it Faith decided to go shopping and try to be a little normal. She knew it would be a while before she got the opportunity to do so. She also thought today would be a good time to mourn a little, to think a little, to search for a little sense of peace before walking back to chaos.


	6. Chapter 6

Returning to the Hyperion Faith gasped at the giant transparent head floating behind Willow and the others. Looking for Conner she dropped her bags and bolted for the basement. Gunn was on watch again and Faith cursed Wesley under her breath.

"Faith what is it?" Gunn asked confused by the ruffled slayer.

"Nothing, it's my turn you can go up." She said unwilling to voice her suspicions regarding Conner.

Watching Gunn begin to walk upstairs she saw the door open and Conner walk in. Breathing out a curse at her suspicion being right she looked at the boy hoping to convince him to walk away without a fight. "Now Conner I could have sworn I told you to stay away from Angel."

"Yeah well I'm not very good at taking instruction. Plus I thought you were out shopping or whatever?"

"I was and now I'm back. Now if I were you I would walk right back up those stairs. I don't want to hurt you but believe me when I say I have no qualms in doing you serious bodily harm." She said shifting into a fighting stance.

She watched Conner hesitate before taking another step down the stairs followed by another. It was obvious the boy was going to ignore her advice. Motioning for Gunn not to interfere she waited for Conner to make the first move. He leaped at her and she merely stepped aside using his momentum to throw him into a wall. In seconds he was up and rushing her again. She did her best to block more than attack. Her punches and kicks landed true in an effort to do just enough damage to get him to stop.

It didn't work and the boy just kept coming at her. Throwing Conner into the cage bars Faith rushed him using her arm to block his windpipe and her entire body to hold him still. "I didn't want to do this I really didn't. Don't fight it." She said shifting her arm and wrapping her hands around the boys' neck. Repositioning her fingers she placed just the right amount of pressure onto his carotid artery. "In a couple of seconds you'll pass out." She said keeping the pressure steady through his struggles. Soon those slowed down and the boy slumped. Lowering him gently to the ground Faith released a sigh. "They never do listen do they?" She said looking over at Gunn.

"He never does that's for sure. Do you need help carrying him back upstairs?" He asked starring with admiration as the slayer ignored his question and picked up Conner in a firemen's carry.

"Nah I'm fine. Can you watch him till I get back?" She asked making her way up the stairs.

"Sure."

Walking back to the foyer Faith dropped Conner onto one of the couches. He was rather light for a man but carrying around dead weight was never fun.

"Jesus Faith what did you do to Conner?" She heard Wesley say behind her, his voice filled with accusation.

"I was just preventing him from staking Angel. He wouldn't leave on his own so I had to be a bit more convincing. Don't worry I didn't even really hurt him. And next time Wesley, don't use that tone of voice with me. I'll happily remind you that you dragged me here to save your ass and I've more than done my job." She said before turning around and walking back downstairs.

Entering the basement Faith looked at the cage and saw Angel awake with Gunn unlocking the shackles. "Are you sure he's back?" She asked suspicion since she didn't really know Angel any more than she really knew Angelus. She certainly wouldn't trust herself to identify one from the other.

"Faith? When did you get here?" Angel asked starring at the dark slayer in confusion.

"I'm the moron that just saved your ass Dead Boy try to be a little more grateful." She said letting out a slight smirk. She still didn't really like him. A decade had passed and she was surprised to realize that in all truth she still didn't like him. She would save him, help him, and keep him alive but it didn't change how she felt about him. "I honestly forgot how much I don't like you." She said unable to help the smile that spread across her face as Angel frowned.

"Well thanks I guess." Angel said starring at his supposed savior. He was rather curious why the dark slayer had never actually liked him. She hadn't been on him mind since he left Sunnydale. When he heard she disappeared it had struck him as strange but he had forgotten about her soon after. His life was rather complicated and he didn't have time for the girl who had constantly rejected his help. Now that she had come to his rescue he was left with a twinge of guilt that he had given her so little thought.

"Now that you're back and able to defend yourself I'm going to go pack my things." Faith said turning around and going back to the foyer to grab the bags she had dropped.

Walking back up to her assigned room Faith took out her new clothes, removed the tags, and began the slow process of packing everything up. It didn't take long and within half an hour she was back downstairs with her new duffle bag. Looking at the assembled group she shook her head. Gunn was reaming out Conner for his stupidity, Willow was talking to Fred, and Angel was standing by himself looking up the stairs as if waiting for her. When she caught him motioning her towards the balcony she put down her bag and followed him out.

"I wanted to thank you properly. I talked to Wesley. He never told me that the Council had sent you to another dimension. I know you didn't have to help me. I know you could have just walked away so I really wanted to say thank you. I know you haven't been back long and you haven't had enough time to find a place to live so I wanted you to know that you will always have a home here. I could always use a slayer on my team. We aren't as busy as Sunnydale but we do get enough." He said in what Faith felt was a relatively long speech. Then again her memories told her that the ensouled vampire did like to make his occasional speeches.

"Thank you and you're welcome." She said before turning around and walking back inside. "You ready to go Willow?" She called out.

The witch nodded as she finished speaking to Fred. Faith walked up to Gunn and said her goodbye's, nodded at Conner, and moved on to Wesley. "You know I have to say it is so weird seeing you like this."

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"In the other world you were a senator, strange to see you as just a watcher." She said with a smile. "Strangest of all is seeing Fred. In my world she was Dr. Saunders. She took care of all of us." Faith says unwilling to divulge the fact that Saunder's was actually a doll named Whiskey.

"Well that would have been a nice path to have travelled." Wesley said before extending his hand. "I just wanted to say thank you and I'm sorry." He said shaking Faith's hand.

"Sorry?" She asked slightly confused as to what he was sorry about this time.

"I'm sorry I wasn't a good watcher. I'm sorry I helped to push you away instead of helping you. I'm sorry I didn't stop Travers from sending you away. And I'm sorry I didn't think about what you would want or could want before I brought you back."

"Its fine and it's all in the past Wesley. I miss that world don't get me wrong, but I know I belong in this one." She said before turning to Willow and picking up her bag showing that she was more than ready to go. She watched as Willow said her goodbye's in turn before they walked out of the hotel and to Willow's car.

"So I know this might be asking a lot but I would really like an update on what's been going on in Sunnydale. I've been a bit out of the loop. What to fill me in?" Faith asked as she put her bag in the trunk and got into the passenger's seat.

"Yeah sure, I guess it's a good thing we have such a long drive ahead of us. It's been a pretty busy three and a half years." Willow said turning on the car and shifting it into gear.

A three hour drive later and Faith was rather surprised at everything that had happened in Sunnydale while she was gone. "So let's recap here, let me see if I have everything right? Buffy has a sister who was a key. Buffy faced off with a demi-god, sacrificed herself to save the world and Dawn, dying in the process. You resurrected her and in the process began to fiddle around with dark magic. Buffy started having sex with yet another vampire, this one didn't even have a soul. Again what is up with that girl having it out with vampire with strange names? I mean Spike? What is he a dog? Anyways, you kept at it with the dark magic, Buffy got shot by a demented human, your girlfriend Tara died, and you killed the guy by flaying him alive. Then you went off to try to destroy the world and Xander of all people stopped you. Now the First evil is back and is having his henchmen kill potentials in an attempt to destroy the slayer line. Did I get it all right?"

"Yup that pretty much sums up the last couple of years. We've gathered up as many potentials as we can so I warn you the house is rather full."

"Wow I mean really if you wanted to save the slayer line then Wesley should have left me where I was." Faith stated starring out at the dark landscape passing by.

"Why do you say that?"

"I'm the last slayer. I carry the line remember?"

"What about Buffy?"

"She's a slayer don't get me wrong, the original even but she doesn't carry the line anymore. When she died she passed it to Kendra who died and passed it to me. It's only when I die that a new slayer will get called. The line would have been rather safe if I wasn't around. Can't end it if the current slayer isn't around now can you?"

"I guess not but then it would have just continued to kill potentials. I would rather face this thing head on then let so many girls die for no reason. I still don't understand how the First thinks to actually end the line. Though if it is a spell or a special way of killing you I'm now not so happy about bringing you back to Sunnydale." Willow said taking her eyes away from the road to look at Faith.

"Well let's just hope the First decides to focus on Buffy then." Faith said with a note of false cheer.

"Yeah I guess we could hope for that. So….on a side note how did the whole dimensional rehabilitation go?" Willow asked hoping for a lighter topic.

"It was different to say the least. I don't think it went the way the Council would have wanted but I suppose it all worked out." Faith said deciding not to really go into her past.

"Why did they keep you there for so long?"

"I don't think that was really a choice for them considering they got blown up. That and the fact that we had lost the battle with Rossum and the world as we knew it ended. Even if the Council had come looking for me they probably wouldn't have found me. My guess is that they took one look at the destruction and turned tail. They probably hoped I would die and then they wouldn't have to worry." Faith said looking at the long stretch of road in front of them. "Jesus Willow look out!" She screamed as she watched a girl being thrown out of a truck and onto the road in front of them.

Willow slammed onto the brakes and jumped out of the car in a panic. Faith did the same and together they helped turn the girl onto her back making sure to stabilize her head first. "Damn Willow this isn't good. We should really call an ambulance." Faith said taking a look at the girl.

"It will take too long for them to get out here and that is if I am lucky enough to get reception." Willow said starring at the girl then looking at her car. "Can you pick her up?"

Faith just nodded before sliding her arms underneath the girls head and knees. She didn't like moving the girl without a means of stabilizing the neck and spine. She knew that she could be doing more harm than good by moving her. Yet she knew that Willow was right and that if they didn't get the girl to the hospital there was a good chance she wouldn't make it. Taking care not to move the neck too much Faith slid into the back seat cradling the girl to her, doing her best to keep the head still. It felt like forever before they reached the hospital and in seconds there were people out with a gurney to help her move the girl.

Faith watched as they took her away to be examined. She already knew that the girl was seriously injured. The nurse and doctor in her head said it would be a touch and go situation. She undoubtedly had internal bleeding, possibly severed intestinal tract, and a good chance of becoming septic. She figured the girl would be very lucky if she survived. Looking down at her own abdomen she felt her scar throb lightly as if remembering what it felt like to have a sharp blade sever through muscle and into soft tissue. She read her medical report; she had lost four feet of large intestine and done sever damage to her left kidney. Septicemia caused the coma but her slayer healing saved the kidney.

Looking at the blood covering her shirt and pants Faith was grateful she was wearing black. The blood wasn't very visible but she could feel it touching her skin and stiffening her clothes as it dried. Finding the bathroom Faith washed her hands, face, neck, and everywhere she found specks of blood. Using the facilities and washing her hands again Faith walked back out to the lobby and found Willow talking to a nurse. She could hear them talking and found out that the girl was heading straight to surgery.

As the nurse walked away Faith followed Willow up to the third floor and surgical ward. Sitting down in a rather uncomfortable chair Faith stared at the wall for a couple of minutes before deciding it wouldn't do her any good to sit here and wait. She had spent enough time in this particular hospital as a patient to not want to stay voluntarily.

"Willow since it's clear you don't need me here I'm going to head out, hit the cemeteries and maybe get a little slaying in."

"Someone needs to tell Buffy. I've been calling the house but she must be out on patrol."

"I guess I'll take a look for her and tell her." Faith said moving towards the doors.

"Faith wait don't you think I should you know be there when you see her?" Willow asked twisting her hands together.

"Uh I don't know why that would be necessary. You told her the stitch that I was coming down to help didn't you?"

"Well uh, no I didn't have time and I didn't think to do it before we left L.A. You're kind of a surprise." Willow said blushing lightly.

"I see, well I guess she will just have to deal." Faith said walking out of the hospital.

It took Faith nearly an hour before she felt that old tingle run up her spine. It had been so long since she had felt it that she found it rather disturbing instead of soothing as it once had been. Ten years of not being a slayer, of not having the strength or senses, had made coming back a bit overwhelming on her senses. She was still strong, stronger even than when she had left. Her body was toned and muscular after years of fighting and training to save the world. She was strong even without the slayer strength, with it she felt powerful. It was that sense of power that made her twice as cautious. She had no desire to return to the brash wild child she had once been. She knew she wouldn't, there were too many people in her head to stop her.

Yet that rush of adrenaline made her keep her guard instead of letting go. Now as her senses went on overload at the approach of what felt like one or two vampires Faith took a seat on a headstone and watched. She felt the tingle not far behind and knew Buffy was close. She could barely remember the girl. Ten years had washed out the few images in her head leaving behind only a vague sense of recollection.

Faith watched as two blonde vampires ran past her, both too preoccupied with the chase to see her. She watched in fascination as the blonde male vampire tackled the female, pulled out a stake and slammed it into the female's chest. Overall she had to admit there was something decidedly horrifying about slaying.

Faiths got up and walked to the vampire keeping a safe distance between them. "Excuse me I just have to ask, when did vampires start hunting their own?" She asked with a smile having a stronger feeling that the vampire in front of her was the souled Spike. Again she marveled at Buffy's fascination for the undead.

"Uh… well…" Spike said and stopped surprised to see a beautiful young woman. "Who are you?" He asked confused.

"Oh that's not really all that important at the moment. I was wondering if you could help me find Buffy Summers?" She asked playing the innocent lost girl for a moment.

"Uh are you a potential?" Spike asked looking the woman in front of him up and down.

"Once upon a time you could say I was." She said taking a seat back on her headstone and watching the vampire. "So could you help me find Buffy?"

"Yeah she was right behind me. She should be here in a sec." He said unable to take his eyes off of Faith.

"Faith?" Faith heard coming from slight to the left and behind her. Turning slightly around Faith stared at the woman who had nearly killed her. The woman who had helped change her life in so many ways. Looking closely Faith noticed how much Buffy had changed. She could see the emptiness in the woman's eyes that came from years of doing the right thing at whatever price. Buffy was stronger, more experienced, and lonely.

"Buffy, it's been a long time." Faith said not moving from her seat. "I came with Willow, we found a girl in the street on the way in. Willow thinks she's a potential. Willow's at the hospital waiting for the girl to come out of surgery. I came to pass the message along."

"Are you still evil?" Buffy couldn't help but ask even though Faith's whole demeanor said she wasn't.

"Depends on your definition I guess and which side of the team you play for. I'm mostly sane and I'm here to help. You can take it or leave it." Faith said starring Buffy in the eyes.

"I guess I have no choice but to take it." Buffy said walking towards Faith. "Where have you been?"

"The Council sent me to the different dimension to be rehabilitated by some rather unethical methods." Faith said with a slight smile before standing up.

Unconsciously the little group began making their way out of the cemetery and towards the Summers residence. Faith remained quiet neither feeling the urge to explain herself or her past nor the urge to listen to Buffy and her possible judgments. Time had erased most of the rage, anger, and hatred towards the blonde slayer; it had not however erased the memory of long winded sanctimonious speeches that Buffy was prone to giving. Faith had no desire to listen to them.

Walking into the Summer's home Faith was surprised that it looked exactly the same. "Same old house, it feels like I've stepped back in time." She said looking around the place.

"Actually since every stick of furniture has been broken and replaced at least once you could say whole new house." Buffy said while taking off her jacket.

"Faith." Faith heard her name and shifted her head to the right where she saw Giles and a young woman researching in the dining room.

"We have another new houseguest."Buffy says stepping further to the right to better reveal Faith.

"Does she have to stay here? Cause there's some nice hotels that welcome tried-to-kill-your-sister types." The young woman states her face a clear visage of dislike.

"I'm guessing you're Dawn." Faith says stepping further into the room to look at the young woman. "I have to say I don't really see the resemblance." Shaking her head Faith looks at the girl and smiles. "I'm sorry I know this might be hard to hear but I was in a different dimension when you came about. I have no memories of you and as far as 'kill you sister types' go that means me, Spike, and Willow all have to find a new place to stay. However, if my presence is going to offend your delicate sensibilities I still have an apartment downtown where I can stay. All I need to do is air it out a bit." Faith says staring at the girl waiting for some type of reaction. The light frown puckering the girls' brow is enough to satisfy.

"That won't be necessary Faith. I would rather you stay here." Buffy said drawing up Faith's hackles in the process.

"Now would that be because you don't trust me or because you want me around for the extra muscle?"

"Both, now I have to go to the hospital and check in with Willow." Buffy said grabbing her jacket that she had just put away and putting it back on.

Faith watches as Buffy walks out the door and looks at the vampire staring at her. "You sure know how to increase the tension in the room don't ya? Though not all of that was because of you, some of that was because of me." Spike said in a consolatory manner. "Giles was part of a plot to kill me for Buffy's own good."

"Well good intentions pave the way to hell or so I've experienced. Pity about Giles then again we have all fallen at least once." Faith said before making her way back outside Spike following right behind her.

"Where are you off to already?" He asked confused.

"Well considering Buffy doesn't own me I thought I would go back to my old apartment; see how things have held up since I've been gone. Do you want to come?" She asked feeling a bit generous.

"Sure, seems you are on a mission to piss Buffy off already. I've heard a couple of stories about you. You slid down to the dark side. What made you come back?" He asked with genuine curiosity.

"I will admit I slipped and once that happened I did slide pretty far down but contrary to popular belief I was never evil. I mean really as much as I fucked around with the gang I never actually hurt anyone. I choked out Xander but I easily could have snapped his neck. I held a knife to Willow's throat but I didn't even pierce the skin. I could have easily killed Angel instead of finding a poison with a cure. Overall I could have done a lot more damage than I did. Everything was rather controlled regardless of the amount of chaos involved. I never wanted to kill or even really hurt them. I just wanted someone to stop me."

"Well luv I don't think they got that message. I mean you killed two people. That's falling pretty far off the good side."

"Yeah well to be honest I've killed a lot more than two people. I would rack it up in the hundred and something. You could say I've always been fonder of instincts over morals. If I need to kill to survive then I'll kill. Ethics and morals are made for those who have the money and privilege to believe in them. Survival has very little to do with either and I have survived hell on earth."

"If that is the case then why did you want someone to stop you while you were in Sunnydale the first time around?"

"I wanted to be stopped because after I killed Wirth I saw how far I had fallen. I wanted to die, I wanted the pain, and the rage, and the hate to stop. I figured the best way to do that would be to die. The Boss's vampires wouldn't touch me and I didn't have the balls to kill myself. I figured if I antagonized Buffy enough she would do the job for me. But at that last moment I didn't let her, I couldn't let her become like me so I jumped off the roof instead." Faith said looking up at the roof she had in fact jumped off of. It was a rather long drop and she was impressed that she had survived it. Part of her still felt a twinge of regret that she had.

Leading the vampire up into the building and up the stairs to the fourth floor Faith shifted the small painting of 'Starry Night' aside and pulled out her spare key. Unlocking the apartment she walked in and again felt as if she was stepping back in time. The apartment was clean which was surprising considering it had been nearly four years since she had stepped into the place. The window was fixed, the furniture either fixed or repaired, everything looked exactly as it did before she fought with Buffy. Flicking the switch next to the door on she was surprised again as the whole place lit up. The Mayor had taken the time to set up an account to pay for her utilities she was just impressed that there was still funds in the account. The apartment was hers, she even had the deed hidden somewhere in the closet.

"Nice place luv." Spike said waiting just outside the apartment.

"Oh yeah come in Spike." She said before turning to look the place over. The Mayor had loved her and a part of her even missed the homicidal father figure. He had cared for her, provided for her, and made her feel wanted. It was the thing she wanted most at the time; to be wanted, to be loved, to be seen. He saw her. He had seen all of her and he didn't judge or criticize. He just loved her with the occasional reprimand. She wished he hadn't been so hell bent on power and taking over the world.

Walking over to the closet Faith opened it and looked around. Wesley hadn't brought over all of her clothes just the majority of them. She still had some stuff left over. Grabbing a pair of pants, a tank top, and some underwear Faith made her way to the bathroom. "Make yourself comfortable. I would offer you something to drink but I doubt there is anything in the fridge." She called over her shoulder before shutting the door to the bathroom.

Spike wandered around looking the apartment over as the water started. He had to admit that the apartment was nice and that someone had really cared about Faith. He suspected it was the Mayor of Sunnydale since she had switched sides and worked with him. Looking the place over he could understand why she would switch. From what he had been told Faith had no parents, no watcher, and no place to live when she arrived in Sunnydale. After watching Giles cold reception towards Faith, Spike could easily envision the man not taking the time to give a girl like Faith enough attention or encouragement. A girl like Faith would have a hard time fitting in with the Scoobies. After years of working with them he was still very much on the fringe of their circle. He could see how difficult that constant isolationism would affect a young girl.

Hearing the shower shut off Spike made his way out to the balcony and looked around. It was just a roof top but it was nice; a good place to sit and think. Sitting on the edge he took out his pack of cigarettes and lit up. Starring out over the quiet town he wondered what had made Faith slip, was it one thing or a series that drove her past the point of no return. He wondered if she would be willing to tell him or talk to him about her past.

"Hey I'm going down to the package store to pick up a couple of beers and snacks, what to come with or you want to stay here?"

Spike turned surprised that he hadn't heard the slayer get out of the bathroom. Nodding his head he put out the remnants of his cigarette and climbed back inside the apartment. It was a short walk to the store. Faith told him to pick out what he wanted and she did the same. He noticed she grabbed a twelve pack of Samuel Adam's pale ale of all things and a couple of bags of chips. He grabbed a bottle of whiskey and followed her to the register. "What ya smoking?" She asked placing her stuff on the counter.

"Marlboro reds." He answered and watched as she bought him a couple of packs. Raising an eyebrow at her generosity he merely said his thanks and waited for her to pay.

Walking back to the apartment in companionable silence Faith led them back up and went straight to the fridge to put the beers in. She grabbed two glasses and the chips before walking back out to the balcony and onto the roof. Taking a seat on the ledge she poured out two glasses and silently handed one to Spike.

"So what are we doing?" Spike asked finally getting curious at the camaraderie that had developed between the two of them so quickly.

"Well I don't have much of a desire to go back to that house and deal with A) the teenagers and B) the animosity and C) Buffy. So I figured I'd chill here for a bit or all night and then go back once I've relaxed a little. I know they're pretty crowded and I don't much care for hanging out with a bunch of strangers."

"I thought they were your friends?" Spike asked hoping to draw the dark slayer into talking about herself.

"They were never my friends." She stated simply before taking a sip of her beer and looking down at the pavement so far below.

"They are a rather tight knit group aren't they?"

"That is the understatement of the year. So what's your thing with Buffy?" Faith asked finally curious about the vampire. She had some of the details from Willow but it was always better to hear it from the horse's mouth.

"Now that is a heavy topic if I've ever heard one. Our thing yeah? Well I'm in love with her and I think I am the biggest fool for it. We had a thing for a while and even I have to say it was a little disturbing. The things she asked of me I have never done in my life." He said stopping for a moment remembering the things he had done with and to Buffy. "It was sick and even sadistic. It all came crashing down one night when I tried to rape her." He said and stopped as he felt the slayer in front of him tense up. "I didn't, she stopped me and I finally saw how far I had fallen. I went searching for a way to get her out of my system. A way to stop the burning need I felt for her. Instead I got a soul, went a little insane, and am now helping her in the vain hope that she will see me for me."

"Wow, that girl can really fuck people up can't she?" Faith asked starring at the bleach blonde vampire with a mix of pity and resentment with a touch of rage. "I think she has done something along the lines to all of us fools who have inadvertently fallen in love with her. I don't remember when it happened to me but she's one of the reasons I plunged so quickly off the deep end. That girl just knows how to fuck with people even when she isn't trying." She said while picking up Spike's cigarettes and lighting one up. She had at least one smoker in her head and the desire for a cigarette was rather intense at the moment.

"So you too huh?" Spike asked taking a shot of his Whiskey and chasing it down with a sip of his beer. "You still in love with her?"

"Honestly I don't know nor have I thought about it. I spent ten years in a different dimension and four of those years I had no clue who I actually was. I've only been me for the last six years and those were spent working to save the world. It wasn't until today and tonight that the girl even crossed my mind. I don't really want to think on it either. I mean my lover of six years died a couple of days ago. It's a little too soon to be considering falling in love or being in love with someone who isn't him." She said grabbing the Whiskey and taking a shot. Paul's face right before he died surfaces in her mind's eye encouraging an extra shot.

"I'm sorry." Spike said making Faith look up at him and nod. "So we just going to spend the night drinking our sorrows away?" He asked making her smile slightly.

"Yeah I think that sounds like a wonderful idea. The drapes are really heavy so you can spend the night here if you want." She says knowing that he won't make an inappropriate move on her. She's still in mourning and he's in love with the woman they both know will never love him back.

Clinking their glasses they toast to the ones they lost and the ones that were left behind.


	7. Chapter 7

Faith woke up with a minor hangover and a cool arm draped around her midsection. Removing the arm which she found out was attached to Spike, Faith got up and walked to the bathroom. She felt a little nauseous and she had a headache but she knew her stomach was willing to hold its foul contents. Using the toilet and rinsing out her mouth Faith walked back in to the living area/ bedroom and saw Spike still snoring lightly.

She was surprised that she got along with the vampire. She supposed it was because they shared some common ground. There were things she was strangely willing to share with Spike that she wasn't willing to share with the others. Like her love of Buffy Summers. It was an old love and years of being some many people paramour had dulled and washed away her feelings for her fellow slayer. She wondered if she still loved Buffy. There was definitely a soft spot when it came to the woman otherwise she wasn't sure she would be in Sunnydale. She had finally gotten her life back and enough money to live a good life; she didn't need to be here. Yet she had come the second Willow had told her what was happening here. It amazed her how quickly she fell back into a role she had never particularly cared for.

Searching for a piece of paper she wrote out a note for Spike and left the apartment. Walking to the meat market she picked up a couple pints of pigs blood and then made her way to the supermarket. She hadn't decided whether or not she was going to stay with Buffy. She didn't care for the animosity from Giles or Dawn, nor did she care for Buffy's coldness. The fact that she would be sharing a rather small space with so many girls made the idea of staying at the Summer's residence about as appealing as going to prison. Picking up some essentials and some food for breakfast and maybe lunch Faith made her way back to the apartment.

Spike was awake and sitting at the kitchen counter staring at her note. "Hey I got you something to eat." She said placing the bag with the blood on the counter before going to put the rest of the groceries away minus the items meant for breakfast. Grabbing the coffee maker she put in water and leveled out the coffee grinds before starting it up. Grabbing a skillet out of the cabinet she put it on the stove and grabbed the potatoes to start peeling them. She worked in silence not giving much thought to the vampire behind her. Since he wasn't talking she didn't feel the need to do so either.

Dishing out her breakfast Faith sat down at the counter while Spike heated up a cup of pigs blood. "So what do you have planned for today?" Spike asked breaking the comfortable silence.

"I guess we have to go back to the little house of horrors don't we. It's" She stopped to look at the clock. "Only 11am so we have at least seven hours before the sun sets. I guess you could use the sewers to get back but I doubt that would be fun. I figure we can hang around here until the sun sets or you can hang out here and I can go back and listen to Buffy yell at me for going against her orders and staying here." She pauses for a second and takes a bite out of her potato. "I think I'm going to hang out here until the sun sets. I've got a couple of video games if you want to hang out and play. It's been a long time since I've had free time to relax. I think the whole hanging out and researching gig can wait another day." She said taking a sip of her coffee and looking over at a smirking Spike.

"I have to admit I am seriously starting to like you luv."

"I think the feeling is mutual." She said finishing up her breakfast and going over to the sink to clean up.

Faith and Spike spent the majority of the day playing video games and occasionally talking. At three Faith went out and bought them another pack of beers. They weren't drinking to get drunk just to enjoy themselves a bit. As the sun finally set Faith stepped out onto the roof top to finish up her last beer.

"The sun just set, I guess our little vacation is over." She said grabbing one of Spikes cigarettes and lighting it up. Inhaling deeply she stared out over Sunnydale before slowly exhaling the smoke. The smoker in her released a sigh of relief.

"Yeah and I'm guessing we are going to get a lot of shit for it too." Spike said before lighting up his own cigarette.

"Well there is nothing for it. I think I might actually move back in here. I suppose it holds some really bad memories but it's been long enough that they no longer have a hold on me. Now it's just a place and a rather comfortable one at that."

"About that I've been mighty curious about your time in that other dimension. How did the Council think another dimension would rehabilitate you?"

"Ah well overall I think it was a pretty decent idea. The world I was in was nothing like this one. There were no vampires, demon, or magic. It was pretty normal. The Council gave me to a corporation called Rossum. They were the leaders in technology of every sort but their main specialty was neurology. They managed to create a machine that could wipe a person away, remove their personality, feelings, everything that made them an individual. The Council's plan from what I read was to have me stay with the Dollhouse, that's what it was called, for the five years that they contract people for, then put me back into my body without my memories of Sunnydale or my watchers death. I was a pretty obedient slayer before the whole Kakistos shit. That monster did his best to fuck me up and it worked. Then I would be called back here and be their perfect little slayer." She said taking another long drag of her cigarette.

"Is that even possible?" Spike asked a little disbelieving.

"Oh yeah, I'm living proof. They took me out and put me on a disc drive. My body was used for four years before everything went to shit, before the technology got out of control and the world ended." She said looking him in the eye.

"What do you mean used your body?"

"It's rather complicated but the jist is that they implant a personality, and when I say personality I mean a whole new person. That person has a life, memories, feelings, the whole deal. Usually we were implanted with personalities and traits that our clients wanted. We satisfied people's needs. Unlike the other dolls I'm special and even after the implants were wiped clean they never actually went away."

"What the hell does that mean? What needs did you satisfy?" Spikes asked a little outraged at the idea of using people in such a manner.

"Well I have 46 people inside my head. All of them have lives of their own inside of me. I can slide into one or the other or just tap into their memories if I need to. And when I say needs I mean the whole spectrum of human needs. I've been a thief, an assassin, a mother, a wife, and a hostage negotiator just to name a few. I satisfied physical needs as well as emotional needs. I've been married 16 times if you can believe it." Faith said with a smile remembering all the weddings she had.

"That's unbelievable, I believe you but it's still unbelievable. Wait you have a child?" He asked his mind catching on the mother part of the conversation.

"One of the people in my head was a mother, a new mother. Her son's name was Jack and her husband was Nate. Nate's wife had died giving birth to Jack and he couldn't deal with it. So he hired the Dollhouse to make me into Jack's mom and Nate's wife. Like I said we satisfy needs." She said remembering how wonderful it felt to hold Jack.

"Wow that's really a lot for anyone to deal with." He said taking a sip of his beer and looking at the slayer in front of him with a mixture of admiration and pity.

"Yeah it is a lot but I handle it rather well I think. Now we better get going before Buffy shits a brick." She said putting out her cigarette and throwing it off the roof.

Walking back into the Summer's residence Faith and Spike were bombarded with questions. "Where have you been? Why didn't you call? Where have you been? We've been looking for you." It all came out in a rush from several voices. The two shared a knowing look before looking at the original gang and shrugging.

"We went back to my old apartment last night." Faith said not feeling the need to further explain her actions.

"You two spent the night together?" Buffy asked angrily with a touch of jealousy.

"Yes but nothing happened, we just had a couple of beers and talked." Spike said hoping to pacify the angry slayer.

"I see" Buffy said clearly not seeing. "Well we need to have a meeting." She said walking into the living room clearly expecting them to follow.

Faith and Spike obediently follow both sharing another look.

Buffy stands in front of the crowd of potentials, and friends looking them over before starting her speech. "We've got a new player in town. Dresses like a preacher. Calls himself Caleb. Looks like he's working for the first." She starts.

"So he's like….The Second?" Dawn questions only to be ignored by Buffy.

"He's taunting us. Calling us out. Says he has something of mine. Could be another girl. Could be something else. Don't know. Don't care." She stops to look at the girls again. "I'm tired of talking. I'm tired of training. He's got something of mine? I'm getting it back." She levels her gaze to the whole group. "And you guys are coming with me." She finishes.

Faith feels her hackles come up. Watching Buffy's stance and behavior she knows that the woman is angry and that worries her more than anything else. People do rather rash things in anger and it seems Buffy is about to do the same thing. Feeling it would be foolhardy to challenge Buffy now in front of the others she waits until they can find a moment less exposed.

Following Buffy up to her room Faith crowds in with Spike, Willow, Giles, and Xander.

"Start arming up the girls. I want to be ready to move when we find him." Buffy says once the small group has assembled and the door is closed.

"We don't even know where we're going." Willow states clearly not liking Buffy's idea.

"That's why I figure we'd do a little recon first; see what we can find out." She says looking at Faith. "You up for it?" She asks and Faith stares at her for a long moment thinking.

"I don't like your idea." She states simply. "I don't like the idea of taking poorly trained girls into an unknown location without knowing what's inside. I have no problem with fighting the big bad or even going after whatever it is you think is down there. I don't want to bring helpless innocents into a hornets' nest and pray for a good outcome." Faith says seeing Buffy about to object she continues. "I'll do recon with you but I want a full recon. I want to see where they are holed up. I want to know how many directions they can come at us from. I want to know how many there are. I've killed a lot of people Buffy and I've watched a lot of my friends die. I'm not taking those girls in there without having a good idea about what I am leading them into."

"You're not leading them; I am. Either you came to help or you came to waste my time."Buffy says clearly angry at Faith for placing even more doubt into the conversation.

"Buffy, I can't believe I am saying this, but Faith is right. You don't even know what this man has of yours, if he does in fact have anything." Giles stated looking at his slayer.

"It could be a girl. A potential trying to get to us." She reasons.

"It could be a stapler." He counters watching as Faith nods her head in agreement.

"I'm going in anyway."

"With the girls? Most of them have yet to be in the field at all, let alone in a life-or-death situation." Giles protests.

"Then it's time we test 'em. We'll just take the ones who've been with us the longest. The rest can stay here."

Faith shakes her head and moves out of the room leaving the conversation behind. She doesn't like the situation and past experience has told her that Buffy is making a big mistake. She's seen more death and destruction than anyone should see. She knows they are walking into a trap. There is no reason for the new player to taunt Buffy with something unless he wants to trap her. Shaking her head at the stupidity of the situation Faith walks downstairs and looks at the girls. Just looking at them she knows they aren't ready. She can practically smell the fear emanating from them.

"Are you going with her?" Faith hears Spike behind her but doesn't take her attention away from the frightened girls.

"I suppose I should. I still think it's a bad idea and I don't like it even a little bit. Her plan isn't even remotely thought out and she is unwilling to actually make a good plan. This is stupid and we are going to get these girls killed." Faith states her voice bordering with anger.

"You never know she could be right and the preacher is holding one of the potentials." Spike says trying to convince Faith to help.

"So we should sacrifice ten to save one?" She asks her gut telling her people will die.

"Just be careful." He says putting a hand on her shoulder and walking away.

Going to the weapons chest Faith takes out a couple of knives and a stake. Putting away her weapons she waits for Buffy to come downstairs. It doesn't take long and the look Buffy gives her tells her it will be a long recon filled with uncomfortable silence.

Walking through Sunnydale they finally spot a Bringer and start trailing him. The way he is leading them somewhere reinforces Faith's feeling that they are walking into a trap. Keeping the Bringer in sight they follow slowly behind.

"So why did you come here Faith?" Buffy asks breaking the long silence between them.

"Honestly it's a question I've asked myself more than once since I got here. The short and simple is that Willow told me what was going down and asked for my help. I finished up with Angel and here I am ready to keep fighting the good fight." She said keeping her eye on the Bringer. "If you don't want my help Buffy just say the word."

"No I want your help; in fact I know we need it." Buffy said stopping for a bit to think. "Where have you been for the last four years? I know Willow said you were in a different dimension but she didn't say much else."

"She didn't say much else because she doesn't know much else. The Council sent me away to be rehabilitated. It was a unique way to rehabilitate someone but I guess it worked." Faith said stopping as she watched the Bringer meet up with another Bringer and walk into a winery. "There's our hornets' nest. Let's get a little closer and look around the place."

"No" Buffy said putting a restraining hand on Faith. "We need to get the others." She said before turning around and making her way back to the house.

Feeling Buffy's obstinacy in listening to reason Faith just shook her head.

Entering the house after a tense walk back Faith heard Xander giving a little speech on how wonderful Buffy really was. Overall it's rather endearing and if she wasn't so angry at Buffy at the moment she would say something. Instead she swallows her annoyance and waits for Buffy to martial the troops up.

Walking back out into the night Faith wishes she had taken the time to know the other potentials. Then again the thought occurs to her that not having a close association with them might be better for her peace of mind. The friends she had found and lost over her years of fighting Rossum come to mind. Not knowing, not feeling can sometimes be a blessing, especially in war.

"Alright we break into two groups, Spike and I are in the first group you and Faith are in the second. Set up a perimeter, guard the door-I don't want anything getting in behind us. You guys are our safety net. This thing's a trap, we give the signal and you come in guns blazing after us." Buffy says pointing to Faith and Xander.

"What's the signal?" Xander asks confused.

"I'm thinking lots and lots of yelling." She pauses looking at the girls. "Shall we?" She says leading her group into the vineyard.

Faith turns to Xander once she see's Buffy is out of probable hearing range. "We are not back up. If we hear screaming and fighting we go in and we get those girls out of there. If the first group can't take it then there is a good chance that we are outnumber and I'm not letting those girls die for no reason. Do you get me?" She asked focusing on Xander but shifting her gaze to the other girls for confirmation. Seeing them all nod, Xander with only mild hesitation she nodded and positioned the girls within sight and on guard.

Keeping her ear open for said screaming or yelling Faith wasn't surprised when she heard it within ten minutes of the first group walking into the trap. Leading her group down the stairs and took a quick survey of the situation. Buffy was down and out for the count, Spike was as well. Motioning Xander to get the girls out Faith went for the first Bringer in her sight. Going straight for the kill she slit its throat and screamed for the girl to get out. Making her way towards the preacher she killed three more Bringers ordering the girls to retreat.

Slamming a kick into the preacher's chest she was mildly surprised to see him only take a step back. It was clear he was powerful and stronger than expected. Keeping out of range Faith decided the best thing to do was to provide enough distraction for Xander to help the other girls get out. Shifting slowly to the left Faith circled the preacher and he followed.

"Why don't I know you?" He asked impressed by her strength.

Faith backed up a bit feeling that talking to the insane preacher was just as good as fighting him if it distracted him. "Why would you know me?" She asked.

"You're different, you're like her." He said looking quickly at Buffy before shifting his attention back to Faith. "Yet there is something about you." He looked to the side making Faith look as well but she saw nothing. "What is she?" He asked having a conversation with something that Faith couldn't see. "You're the One aren't you? She is the original and the longest living slayer but you are the Slayer. You carry the line don't you?" He asked fascinated.

Faith stared at the obviously crazy preacher and knew that he had figured out whom she was and that it probably wasn't a good thing. She wondered if he had a method of destroying the line through her.

"I see such darkness in you and such light. Your strength is different from hers. I've searched for you. I tortured the Council to find you. None of them knew anything. I couldn't find pictures or documents, nothing. This changes things now doesn't it?" He asked but Faith wasn't sure if he was talking to her or to the invisible things he had been speaking to before.

Shifting her focus away from the preacher Faith looked for the girls and saw that they were all gone. Xander was helping Buffy up and Spike was on his knees. Shifting again Faith pulled further into the room hoping the preacher would follow. He was freaking her out with the look he was giving her. Staring back at the preacher Faith noticed a flicker of some emotion before he suddenly reached out for her. Pulling up her two knives to block him, they grappled and she lost her grip on one of her knives. The other got trapped between them and she felt it slide through her shoulder before the preacher grabbed her arms and threw her across the room. Slamming into a barrel of wine Faith felt it shatter from the force. Dropping to the ground she realized the knife had either fallen out or got ripped out when she was thrown. Getting up she ran to the stairs putting pressure on her left shoulder to try to stop the bleeding.

Following the group of beaten girls back to the Summer's residence Faith kept an eye to their rear just in case the Bringers or the preacher decided to follow. Thankfully neither did and the walk back was quick. The girls who weren't badly injured helped the ones who were. Overall she had to admit that they walked out of that ambush with minimal casualties.

Entering the Summer's residence she looked over the girls, she saw one had a broken arm, and the others had a couple of cuts, bruises and maybe some broken ribs. Nodding her head she went straight to the kitchen and grabbed the big emergency kit. "Faith I think you and Rona need to go to the hospital." Faith looked back and saw the concerned look on Xander's face.

"No thanks I would rather not sit incapacitated in a public place with that guy around." She said taking off her jacket. The bleeding had slowed; grabbing a couple of paper towels Faith applied pressure to the wound and waited a couple of minutes. Checking to see if the bleeding had finally stopped she removed the towels and threw them away. Grabbing a pair of scissors she cut off her tank top. It was soaked in blood and she knew it wouldn't be worth it to save it. Grabbing a couple more paper towels she wet them and cleaned off the area. The bra was soaked in blood but she left it on. Picking up a couple of cotton balls she soaked it in alcohol and cleaned the wound, hissing as it burned through her. Selecting a needle and thread she threaded it and sterilized the needle. Moving to the bathroom she used the mirror to stitch her shoulder up. It was only a couple of inches long but by the end of the process she was sweating.

Xander watched the whole process surprised that Faith hadn't screamed or cried out in pain. He could tell that it hurt from the sweat that had broken out on her body. Yet she persisted and did the entire job without asking for help. Watching the slayer in front of him he had to admit if only to himself that he was impressed by how much she had changed. The old Faith wouldn't have thought to get the girls out. The old Faith wouldn't have argued with Buffy on the benefits of properly scouting out the vineyard. In the end Faith was right, the place was a trap, and without her quick thinking people would have died.

"Do you need me to get you anything?" He asked making the slayer look up at him.

"A bottle of JD if you have it and a shirt." She said making him smile.

"I can do the shirt but I don't think there is any hard liquor in the house." He said moving to go upstairs to get the aforementioned shirt.

Faith tied off her stitches and cleaned up the wound again before bandaging it. Walking out into the living room she looked at the girls. They were still hurt and had begun to tend to each other. Looking at Rona she noticed the girl was wincing and still cradling her arm. Faith was amazed that no one had thought to take the girl to the hospital.

"Let me see your arm." She said walking up to the girl and feeling the break she realized that it was dislocated at the elbow. She wouldn't need surgery but it would hurt like hell to set it again. Looking up as Xander returned with a fresh shirt she asked him for materials so she could set the arm. "Xander I need you to get me a lot of gauze, plaster, a large bowl, and a glass of water." She watched him go towards the basement. "Alright now this is going to hurt more than anything has ever hurt before. However, once I re-set the bone it should take away most of the pain you are feeling right now."

"Wait. Do you know what you're doing?" Kennedy asked while Rona merely nodded her head.

"I have a doctor and a nurse up here so I know what I'm doing." She said with a smile pointing to her head. She chuckled at the confused look on Kennedy's face before looking at Rona. Repositioning her hands she got a firm grip on the forearm and moved her other hand to the upper arm to hold it in place. Applying pressure to the forearm she pulled it out and twisted it back into place. Rona screamed while Kennedy winced in sympathy. Once the arm was back in place Faith felt it, applying minute amounts of pressure to make sure everything was okay. Moving Rona's arm to be sure nothing was damaged in the process Faith ignored the girl's moan of pain. The whole process would have been easier with drugs but in the end it was still down with minimal difficulty. Faith had to admit that Rona was lucky and there didn't appear to be any nerve damage.

Looking up Faith realized that a small crowd had gathered to watch her work. Ignoring them she helped Rona up and moved to the kitchen to make a cast. Xander followed the materials held precariously in his arms. Sitting Rona down Faith got to work mixing the plaster. It wasn't medical quality but it would serve the purpose she had in mind.

An hour later Rona had a drying cast and Faith was exhausted. Ignoring everyone else she dragged herself to the door. Stopping before she opened the door Faith considered the look on the Preacher's face. She didn't like his expression when it came to figuring out who she was. Nor did she think she would be safe in her apartment all alone. Looking around the room at all the defenseless girls she realized she didn't want to put them in further danger by staying near them. Opening the door she felt Spike come up behind her.

"I'll walk you home luv. You look like hell." He said grabbing his jacket and walking her out. Faith merely nodded and made her slow way back to her apartment.


	8. Chapter 8

Waking up Faith moaned, her body felt sore and it reminded her loudly that it did not appreciate being so poorly used. Getting up Faith went to the bathroom, used the toilet, took a shower, and then checked on her stitches. The wound was healing nicely and by tomorrow if not the end of the day she would have to take them out. The doctor and nurse in her couldn't help but marvel at the level of healing.

Changing into a comfortable pair of jeans and a button up blouse Faith made breakfast. A three egg vegetable omelet later she was cleaning up then locking up the apartment and making her way back to the Summer's residence. The walk wasn't long and the sun was just reaching its zenith by the time she walked through the door. Looking at the girls lounging around the house Faith called them over and took them out back. They needed to be trained and it seemed that Buffy was preoccupied at the moment.

Faith had mixed feelings about the matured Buffy. Before Buffy would listen to Giles now she acted as if she knew everything. Faith had to admit Buffy was right on the point that the preacher did in fact have something that belonged to Buffy or to the slayer line. Faith remembered the flick of emotion when she had backed up too deeply into the depths of the vineyard. It was that flick of fear? Anger? She wasn't sure but it was that simple slip that told Faith there was something important in that vineyard. Faith knew they had to go back but this time she was going to work on figuring out how to get in there without nearly killing everyone. The preacher was powerful and that made him very dangerous.

Focusing on the girls Faith started out with stretching then moved on to simple exercise. Being a slayer meant you were naturally strong and these girls weren't slayers. She needed to build up their strength, endurance, and stamina. Taking off her shoes Faith took off her socks and used them to mark her lines. Twenty feet out she dropped the first sock and then walked another twenty feet and dropped her other sock. Explaining to the girls how to run a suicide she showed once for example and then watched the girls do twenty. It was exhausting running nearly stopping and starting again turning around and repeating but it built up stamina and endurance.

All afternoon Faith worked out the girls focusing less on fighting then on building up their strength. They didn't have enough time and she couldn't help but resent that fact that Buffy or one of the others hadn't been working out the girls. Skill in combat was useless if you didn't have the strength and endurance to back it up. Faith felt as if she was working from ground zero.

Calling it a day on working out Faith walked into the Summer's home and looked through the fridge. She had to admit the house was sadly lacking in the food department. Then again she supposed feeding twenty something people would quickly deplete anyone's food supply. Releasing a sigh she looked for Xander and asked to borrow his car. Inviting three of the girls along with her Faith went to the supermarket to get supplies.

An hour and a half later she was back and grateful for the extra help in packing up the car and carrying everything into the house. Her shoulder was still a little tight and putting weight on it was not desirable for a speedy recovery. Two other girls came to help and soon everything was put away.

Looking at all the girls Faith decided to make dinner. Everyone was hungry and the majority of the girls had minimal cooking skills. From what Faith remembered about Buffy she had even less than minimal. Deciding everyone could use a good dose of protein and carbs Faith asked Xander to heat up the grill. Taking out the hamburger she had bought Faith got to work making hamburger patties. Vi and Kennedy offered to help and she showed them what to do before leaving them to start working on the pasta salad.

An hour and a half later everything was done and the whole house was eating. Faith ate while she cleaned up. She hated to leave a mess behind for someone else to clean. Once the girls were fed and the kitchen was clean Faith called the girls back out to the back yard to work on the technical aspects of combat. They majority moaned and groaned but they all went willingly enough. Grabbing two swords, two staffs, and four knives Faith took them all to the yard. The sun was starting to set but there was still plenty of light to see by.

"We will start off this evenings lesson with the long sword. The long sword is a two handed weapon and has four fundamental stances. To master the long sword you must be able to transition from one stance to another smoothly. The first stance is Ochs which involves raising your arms up and bending at the elbow. The sword tip points slightly downward typically pointed at the opponents face." Faith said demonstrating the stance as she spoke. "The blade is neither horizontal or vertical but diagonal. When you lower the sword downward you go into pflug, the point should aim at either the chest or throat of the opponent. The hilt should be held slightly to the side at your center of gravity. This is a thrusting motion. The third position is Alber which has the sword point down. Last is Vom Dach where you raise the sword along with your shoulders. This is a deep slashing motion." Faith said and then proceeded to transition from one move to the other.

Handing her long sword to Molly and the second sword to Kennedy she watched them go through the motions and critiqued. Stopping them occasionally to fix their feet, stance, and grip Faith was patient and thorough. Once Faith felt the two girls had a decent understanding of the stances she moved on to Vi and Amanda. Working with each girl Faith watched and critiqued before moving on to staffs. It was a slow process going through the basics with each girl on each weapon but Faith knew it was necessary and the activity allowed her to get to know each girl.

Finishing up as the back light turned on Faith smiled and told the girls to go in and wash up. She promised that they would start all over again in the morning. That comment was followed by light moans and a few nods. Smiling Faith walked back into the house and took a seat at the kitchen island. She was tired and she knew that most of it came from the blood loss. Getting up and making a pot of coffee Faith stared out at the dark back yard as the coffee brewed. Pouring out a cup and mixing it with a bit of cream Faith sat down. It was her first real moment of peace and she was happy to enjoy the semi silence.

"I saw you working with the girl's Faith. I never knew you knew so much about the technique of sword fighting." Giles said coming up behind her.

Looking over at the older gentleman Faith merely smiled. "I didn't, in a way I don't, but someone up here does which means I do." She said pointing at her head. That made Giles frown and she could see the man was questioning her sanity. It made her chuckle lightly and she saw the frown clear on the man's brow. It was clear he thought she was pulling his leg.

"Well I'm glad that you are working with them. I wish Buffy had more time to do so." He said before putting a kettle on.

Faith decided not to comment and hoped he would allow the silence to fall and stay between them.

"I've been curious." He said stopping to grab a cup and a tea bag. "When Willow told me you were sent to another dimension. I've been meaning to ask you what was it like?" He asked.

"No vampires, no demons, no magic. I was normal and whatever made me a slayer either didn't work there or the Council stopped it from working. It was different; it was harder in some ways." She said stopping unsure how much she wanted to tell the watcher.

"Really that is fascinating. What did you do there? How were you rehabilitated?" He asked pouring out the hot water.

"I did what I was told, well to an extent. Then the world ended and I fought with the few survivors to fix it." She said taking a sip of her coffee.

"How did it end if there weren't any vampires, or demons, or evil?" He asked clearly confused.

"Man is far more evil and vicious than the demons of this world Mr. Giles. The darkness in the heart of humanity is more than capable of destroying the world." She said hoping to end the topic.

Giles nodded as if he actually understood which sparked an ounce of anger in Faith's heart. He had no idea what it was like to be used, to be property, to be empty. He had no idea of the true darkness that lay barely under the surface of mankind. She had seen true darkness.

Turning away from Giles, Faith placed her cup in the sink. She would have washed it but didn't want to encourage the watcher. Instead she walked out of the kitchen, said goodbye to the girls and made her way back to her apartment. She was tired and her stitches needed to be removed. She knew tomorrow would be a long day and she needed to get some supplies for her next project.


	9. Chapter 9

Getting up early Faith went through her morning routine before walking out of her apartment. She had found her lock picks hidden under the same floor board which had made her smile. Now all she needed were a few supplies from the sports store, the gun shop, and a visit to the school. After talking to the Spike, Faith had learned that the high school principal was the son of a slayer and currently involved in their fight against the First. Seeing that connection as rather useful at the moment Faith made him a priority in her list of things to do.

Searching through the sports store Faith picked out rock climbing gear and enough rope to belay 300ft. Stopping up at the gun shop she picked up several boxes of shotgun ammo. Last she stopped at the school. It was strange walking into the new building where so many memories of the old resided. Making her way to the principal's office Faith knocked. It wasn't long before she heard a come in.

"May I help you miss?" The handsome man behind the desk asked. Faith was impressed, she had never had such a handsome man as a principal.

"My name is Faith and I'm working with Buffy Summer's." She said and immediately saw the recognition in his eyes.

"Please come in Faith. I'm Robin Wood. What can I do for you?" He asked getting up and shutting the door.

"Well you have a chem lab here and I need to use it and I need you to order me some materials." She said handing him a list. She watched as he read it over and his eyebrows rose several times.

"These are some rather dangerous materials. Do you know what you're doing?" He asked still staring at the list.

"I do and the sooner I get use of your lab and those chemicals the better. Do you think you can order them?" She asked hoping she wouldn't have to change tactics. She didn't have enough contacts in Sunnydale or in this reality to make the explosives she wanted without the use of the lab.

"It's doable. Most of the students don't come to school anymore so I can have a lab set up just for you. The materials might take a couple of days to get since I will have to order them and go through a lot of paperwork." Robin said folding up the list and putting it into his pocket. "I'll call Buffy's house or stop by when the lab and chemicals come in."

Getting up Faith thanked him before taking her shopping bags and going back to her apartment. Dropping everything off Faith walked to the Summer's residence. The girls were already out back stretching and she had to smile. She was glad that they were so eager to train.

Collecting the girls she took them for a three mile run before returning to the house and starting training. Most of the girls were already tired after the run but the listened and followed her instructions. There was still a lot of correcting in technique but Faith had to admit that they were building up their skill.

By five o'clock Faith called it a night and went in to make dinner. Again she wondered how the girls survived when nobody in the house ever cooked. It wasn't a chore she particularly cared for but having more than woman in her head with cooking abilities made it easy enough. Once again some of the girls helped with dinner and in two hours she had the table set and a small feast spread out.

"Faith I have to say I am rather impressed by your change." Giles said before grabbing a plate and grabbing his food.

Faith didn't bother responding just nodded her head. Grabbing a plate for herself Faith piled it with food, then grabbed some blood out of the fridge and heated it for Spike. Walking downstairs with her plate and the mug Faith greeted Spike handing him his dinner.

"You've made quite an impression on everyone." He said before taking a sip.

"Yeah well someone needs to train them and feed them." She said taking a bite out of her salad. She had made rice, beans, salad, a mix of vegetables, and two roasted chickens.

"They managed before."

"Well they almost died walking into that trap. I'm not delusional enough to think they will all survive this war but I would rather send them in trained then send them in as sheep to slaughter."

Spike just nodded allowing the silence to build between them. It was rather comfortable and he was surprised by it. He understood Faith or at least to a certain extent. They both had very dark pasts and they both were working to redeem themselves. He had a feeling Faith had already managed to redeem herself. She was back because she wanted to be back. It was clear the girl had the means to survive and didn't need to be a hero. She had an inner strength that amazed him. The things she had gone through boggled his mind. He had to admit he was rather impressed with her. If he weren't already in love with Buffy he would have fallen for Faith.

The basement door opening drew the two companion's attention to the stairs. They both watched as Buffy walked down the steps. Looking Buffy over Faith could tell she wasn't happy. The tension in the room rocketed but Faith refused to move. Taking another bite of her food Faith ignored Buffy.

"I thought I asked you to stay here."Buffy opened staring at Faith.

"Well I don't take orders from you Buffy. If it becomes necessary for me to move here then I will, till then I'm staying in my old apartment." Faith replied not even bothering to look up. She was still a little angry.

"Really Faith are you just trying to piss me off."

"Last I checked no I wasn't."

"Well you are doing a really good job at it. I need you here to help with the girls, to watch out for them when I'm not here."

"I do help with the girls. I spent yesterday and today working with them. I've made everyone dinner twice and last I looked you had Spike and Willow here to watch them when you aren't around." Faith countered looking Buffy in the eye.

Buffy just turned around angry that she had no other excuse to keep Faith around. Faith watched the little slayer huff and puff before she stomped back upstairs. Releasing a sigh Faith returned to her meal. It was rather good she had to admit.

"I do like having you around Faith. You always manage to stir things up." Spike said with a small smirk.

Faith just nodded finishing up her food and making her way back upstairs. She didn't feel like doing the dishes and she hoped one of the girls would. She had originally planned on asking Spike to join her tonight but decided against it. If Buffy really needed him around she wasn't going to take him just so he could help her with a robbery.

Returning to her apartment Faith changed into black leather pants and a black long sleeved shirt. Grabbing the climbing gear and her lock picks Faith walked out of her apartment and scouted the area. Few people were on the street and it was late. Finding a truck parked on the street she walked up to it and broke in. Hotwiring the car she drove to the military base. The base was gated and after driving around it she found a spot where the security cameras didn't cover. Faith wondered why the security was so lax but considered it a blessing. Grabbing the car mat she used it as a cover for the barbed wire while she jumped the fence.

Keeping to the shadows Faith noticed that most of the soldiers were either gone or asleep. The guard rotation was made up of two soldiers for the entire base. They stayed at the front and back of the base communicating on their radios. It was clear that they didn't have enough personnel to do a full sweep of the place. Searching out the armory Faith found another guard posted. That was rather inconvenient and she didn't want to hurt him. Sneaking up behind him she grabbed him in a choke hold.

"Don't struggle I don't want to hurt you. I have you in a choke hold and you should be blacking out in three, two, and one." She whispered in his ear easing him down to the floor. Looking over the weapons she picked out a couple of handguns, and went on a search for the C-4 and detonators. Finding a small cache of them she grabbed as much as she could carry and made her way carefully back to the fence. Taking out the wire cutters she cut a small enough hole to get the C-4 out and then climbed the fence.

Packing everything into the truck Faith drove back to her apartment dropped everything off and then returned the truck where she had found it. She didn't need to attract the attention of the cops by stealing cars.

Walking back to the apartment Faith spent the rest of her night making explosives. She didn't need much just enough to possibly distract the preacher and his Bringers. Making a list for more materials Faith called it a night and went to bed.


	10. Chapter 10

Authors Note: I just wanted to give a big huge thank you to all the people who took the time to review. I know it's time consuming and it takes effort and for those of you who did I really appreciate it. You guys make it worth killing so much of my time to write. Thanks again and I hope you like this chapter. I ended up extending this chapter by two pages after some of the comments in review so enjoy. More to come sooner rather than later.

Getting up Faith wondered how quickly life had become rather monotonous. Going through her morning routine Faith got ready for the day and made her way out into the streets of Sunnydale. She was rather surprised by what she saw. It seemed that the citizens of Sunnydale had finally gotten wise to what was happening in their little slice of suburban America. The streets were filled with cars and it was clear the town was voluntarily evacuating itself. That could put several kinks in her plans so Faith decided she needed to get the rest of her supplies before the day was over.

Walking to the local Radio Shack Faith walked through the aisle picking up everything she would need to make a couple of listening devices. She picked up several FM receivers, AA batteries, five transmitters and five amplified microphones. Taking her purchases back to the apartment she went back to the streets for a couple more supplies. She knew if people were evacuating that eventually the town would lose power. That meant they would need a source of light. Going to the hardware store she found it deserted. Deciding to take what she needed Faith grabbed two carts and stared grabbing supplies. She filled one cart with flashlight, lanterns, and batteries. The second with candles, lighters and a gas powered generator. Walking out of the store Faith was mildly surprised that no one looked at her twice.

Dragging the two carts to the Summer's residence she called the girls and told them to put everything away because she still had a couple of things she needed to do. Returning to the center of town Faith went to the cell phone store and picked up all of their cheap phones. The store was still open which she found weird but she was willing to buy the things she needed. Returning home with another stop at Radio Shack to pick up a six recorders Faith went back home and got to work.

Three hours later and six bugs made Faith was ready for her attack on the preacher and his vineyard. Deciding to test her luck Faith packed a bag with a couple of charges of C-4 and the bugs and went to the Vineyard. If she was lucky the preacher would be out, if not she hoped she was able to distract him.

Looking over the vineyard Faith spotted a couple of Bringers but she didn't see the preacher. She knew it could mean he was in the building itself. Walking around the building to the back Faith set a charge into the base of the building and set the detonator to go off in three minutes. Moving to the side she set off another charger for six minutes. Moving away from the building Faith hid in the underbrush and waited for the first explosion to go off.

The bang and debris attracted the Bringers and they came out in a small swarm to the back of the building. Taking advantage that the preacher didn't come out Faith crossed her fingers and went into the building. She had three minutes to plant her bugs and get out. Searching for well hidden areas Faith turned on her bugs and placed them. Going deeper into the building she looked for whatever it was that caused the preacher to show fear the other night. Seeing a large hole in the back wall going deep into the earth Faith followed. Keeping to the shadows she saw six Bringers working on chiseling something that was imbedded in stone.

The second charge went off and Faith knew she had run out of time. Making a bee line for the exit Faith ran as quietly as possible hoping not to attract attention. Getting out of the building and into the woods Faith kept up a good pace. She had only a knife and she knew if she got caught by the Bringers it might be the last mistake she ever made.

Running to the Summer's residence Faith set up her receivers in the living room. Faith looked at Dawn. The girl was clearly surprised to see her. The look quickly turned to animosity but Faith had no time for it. "I have a job for you." She said as she finished up setting everything. "I've planted a couple of bugs into the vineyard. I need you and maybe one of the other girls to listen to whatever preacher man says and write it down. He might say something important he might not say anything but hopefully this will give us a clue as to his next move." She said showing Dawn how to work everything and taking out a couple of pads of paper and pens for her.

"How did you do this?" Dawn asked confused.

"I learned a few new tricks." Faith she said before looking at the girl for a long moment. "You know while I'm available I think we should have a little one on one time. I don't know what you remember or what the monks said what happened but I'm really sick of seeing your dirty looks and feeling your sharp words. If you have an issue let's get it out in the open so this crap can stop." Faith said taking a seat and looking at Dawn expectantly. It was clear her words threw the girl off because she merely stared at Faith for a long moment before slowly nodding her head.

"I guess I'm still angry at you for betraying Buffy, for hurting her so much, for hurting me. I hated the fact that you suddenly didn't like me anymore. One day we were friends and the next you told me I had to stay away from you. Then I heard all the things you did to Buffy and it just made me angry that you were working so hard to hurt us. I thought I was your friend Faith?" Dawn says her voice becoming a little strained.

"I see well there really isn't much I can do about that Dawn. If you want an explanation I can give it to you but I can't offer solace or closer." Faith said a little lost on how to proceed with a girl she didn't even know existed a couple of days ago.

"I guess you could tell me why. I've never been able to figure out why you went bad and started working with the Mayor." Dawn said clearly seeking a reason behind the actions of the past.

Nodding her head Faith tried to think of the right way to tell the kid the realities of the past. Thankfully time had wiped away most of the emotions involved with the past and it allowed her to look at it objectively.

"Alright I guess I could do that." Faith said nodding her head. "I came to Sunnydale with Kakistos hunting me down. Do you remember my tattoo?" She asked pointing to her arm where there was nothing, not even a scar. The dollhouse had removed it so she would be 'perfect'. "There was a tracking spell attached to the tattoo. Kakistos must have thought I would escape because I did manage it more than once. The first time I got away he had me marked so that I could never run again. Or at the very least I couldn't run very far.

"The thing I never told you guys about Kakistos is that he liked to play with his food. My watcher was in his delicate care for three weeks before he killed her. I managed to get away once and when I tried to come back for my watcher he caught me. By the end of those three weeks my watcher was insane. All remnants of humanity, of sanity had been slowly striped away layer by layer. I watched most of it and I can tell you that beyond being rather creative Kakistos was a rather sadistic bastard.

"As you know he tracked me here and Buffy and I managed to kill him. Now some of the things you might not know was that I had little to no money when I arrived. The Council was no longer supporting me since I didn't have a watcher. So some reasons for going to the Mayor included that he was actually willing to provide for my basic needs. He made sure I was fed, clean, dressed, and that I had a roof over my head. Giles and Wesley never took my physical needs into consideration. They never asked or even wondered how I was able to pay for that crappy motel room. They never wondered how I was able to feed myself. Trust me when I say more than once I sacrificed eating for a place to sleep. It was a hard life for me Dawn. I was sixteen and I had to decide each day which was more important; something to eat or a place to sleep. I made a lot of sacrifices and my rewards for those sacrifices were few and far between.

"That night in the alley changed everything. I don't know if your sister told you everything that happened so I'll go over it again. We were going through the alley taking out vampire after vampire. On the last one Buffy grabbed him and threw him to me as she had done with the others. I plunged my stake into his chest and I was rather surprised when he didn't turn to dust. Allen was an accident and regardless of the bull shit I spewed out I felt terrible, I also felt betrayed. Your sister blamed me for his death and the guilt was overwhelming.

"Things got worse between me and the gang and by the end I was so wrapped up in my own self hatred that the only thing I could think of was dying. So I went to the Mayor and honestly he worked very hard at making me feel wanted, making me feel loved. I still wanted to die don't get me wrong but for the first time in months I felt as if someone actually cared about me. It was nice. So I played his games and gave him and the world the impression that I was helping him as much as possible."

"Wait what do you mean played his games?" Dawn interrupts.

"Well I mean I wasn't evil, I was suicidal. I wanted to die Dawn and honestly I didn't have the strength to kill myself. So I figured your sister could do it for me." Faith says with a small smile. "I worked hard at antagonizing her. I picked on Angel, I choked Xander, and I threatened Willow. I don't know what you think I did to you. Drawing a blank in that department. Overall I was just working her into a temper so she could do the job without remorse."

"Then why did you kill the professor?" Dawn interrupts again.

"This may sound cold but honestly he was just a casualty of war. The Mayor wanted him dead and I knew it would be one more reason for your sister to kill me. Don't get me wrong I do regret killing him but at the time the meaning of right and wrong was rather blurred. It was need and survival, and a death wish all combined. Anyways to move on I poisoned Angel so Buffy would come after me. I mean really do you know how long it took to find a poison with a cure? Especially a cure that required draining and possibly killing a slayer? I spent weeks looking for that poison. It didn't hurt that Angel had to suffer either. So that's the jist of it kid. I wanted to die and your sister was a means to an end. I would have let her kill me in the end except the idea of being fed to a vampire was about as appealing as being ganged raped. Plus I didn't want her to become like me, to fall into that pit of darkness and despair and guilt. So once she stabbed me I jumped. I figured if the knife wound didn't kill me the fall would. Seriously messed up that neither of them did.

"So does any of that make you feel better? I hated your sister and honestly I loved her too. It's a thin line and the pain it can cause is immeasurable. Do I regret what happened? I don't know. I can't change how things happened and honestly I'm not sure I would. It helped make me into the person I am today and I can't resent that. Am I sorry if you got hurt in the crossfire? Not particularly since in my mind you never existed. Do I desire for us to build new bridges over the wreckage of the past? Sure, from what I heard you're a pretty awesome person and I could always use another friend." Faith finished staring at the girl in front of her expectantly.

"Let me think on it. I will stop with the sharp words and nasty looks though." Dawn said extending her hand in a truce. Faith smiled and shook it.

Getting up Faith walked out of the dining room and went to look for the girls. She had already been late to train them and the heart to heart with Dawn had only delayed her even more. Walking out side Faith noticed the sun was a little past its peak. Looking at the backyard she couldn't help but smile at all the girls already out stretching.

"I organized the girls and we went for a run. We followed the route you took us on yesterday." Kennedy reports as she stretches her quads.

Faith smiled again happy that the girls were taking her words seriously. She didn't care for being put in charge by proxy but she had to admit it wasn't so bad when the girls were so eager.

Four hours later Faith walked back into the house. The girls were starving and Faith had to admit so was she. It had been a long day and breakfast was a long time ago. Rummaging through the kitchen Faith released a sigh of mild aggravation. There was food in the house but they were back to the minimum. Again she was surprised at how much twenty people could eat in a matter of a couple of days.

The only good thing she could think of was that the town was practically empty and at least this time she probably wouldn't have to pay for the groceries. Searching around the house she found Xander. He was in the dining room talking to Dawn. Interrupting the conversation she asked for his keys. Fishing them out of his pocket he threw them to her before asking her where she was going.

"I'm going to the store. The house isn't empty but we honestly don't know how much longer we are all going to be shacked up here." She told him with a slight smirk.

"Do you need a hand?" He asked and she was surprised that he offered. Nodding her head she walked to the door. Throwing the keys back to Xander, Faith decided he could drive.

The grocery store still had food which surprised Faith. The place was locked up and Faith decided that they had nothing to lose by breaking in to the place. Going to the back door she took out her lock picks and picked the locks. It was a three tumbler lock and she smiled at how little the people of Sunnydale actually worried about security.

Entering the building with Xander following behind Faith went straight to the office. Again she had to pick the lock. Walking in Faith looked over the security system and disabled it. She was surprised that someone had thought to arm the place before they left the night before or the night before that. Checking out the surveillance system Faith she was grateful that they only had a basic video tape system instead of a high tech off site monitoring system. It saved her a lot of time. Removing the tapes she shut off the surveillance and walked out of the office.

"Did you just do what I think you did?" Xander asked and Faith nearly jumped since he had been so quiet she had almost forgotten about him.

"If you mean did I just make sure we don't get in trouble for robbing this place? Then yes." She said before grabbing a cart. Walking through the aisles with Xander following with a second cart Faith picked up a cart full of fresh vegetables and a cart full of fresh fruit. She figured they would be the first to spoil and the best things to feed the potentials. Going to the cash registers she bagged all the food and took them back to the car.

Packing up the car Faith and Xander made another run through the store for dried goods. She made sure to grab loads of pasta, sauce, snacks, and cereal. Returning to the registers they bagged the goods before packing them into the car. The last trip they covered the milk, cream, cheeses, meats, sugar, spices, and fish. By the time they were done the whole truck and back seat were full. Locking up the store Faith got into the car and looked at Xander. She was impressed that he hadn't objected even once.

"So I never got to thank you for saving us at the vineyard." He started and Faith just nodded her head. "I know I haven't been the friendliest person since you've been back and I'm sorry. I haven't really thought about the past and what happened between us until you arrived. When I first saw you I have to admit I was angry. You hurt us all the last time you were here. But after talking to Dawn earlier today I think I might final understand why." He paused and Faith wondered where he was going with the conversation.

"I just well I wanted to say I am sorry." He said making Faith stare at him in confusion. "I didn't understand what you were going through when you first came here. I don't think any of us understood. We should have worked harder to include you and we shouldn't of ostracized you for Finch. It was an accident but we acted as if you had done it on purpose." He paused again as if unsure of what else to say. "So I guess I just really wanted to apologize and thank you for coming back. You've helped a lot and maybe the others don't see it but I've seen it. You train the girls, you cook dinner every time you are over, and you think of the basic things like shopping. You've made this war a little easier to get through and I just wanted you to know I appreciate it." He stopped as they pulled up in front of the house. Turning to look at Faith he studied her for a minute. "So thank you." He said before getting out of the car and leaving Faith in a state of shock.

Shaking off her shock Faith got out of the car and stopped him as he was grabbing the bags. "Well if we are in a sharing mood then I'll say I'm sorry for the past and I hope we can start fresh." She said offering the olive branch. She didn't know if they would ever be actual friends but getting along would be good enough for her.

"I forgive you for the past since it seems you are forgiving me. So yeah we can start fresh." He said grabbing a couple of bags and making his way to the house.

Faith grabbed the rest in the trunk and trudged her way into the house. The sun had long since set and she called the potentials to go finish emptying the car. She had to admit they were good for manual labor. Smiling Faith went to the kitchen and put away the vegetables that she wouldn't be using over the next couple of days. She kept out the fruits in the hopes that the girls would eat them. Asking the girls to put the groceries away she got to work making dinner.

Finishing up dinner Faith looked at the clock. It was nearly 9pm. They were going to have a very late dinner. Remembering that the dining room was filled with her transmitters Faith set out all the food on the island and called the girls in to grab dinner. The girls practically stormed into the kitchen and she knew that they were tired and hungry. She expected they would all be asleep before eleven. Shaking her head Faith waited for all the girls to grab their food before she grabbed her own.

Everyone sprawled around the living room. Joining the girls Faith was a little surprised to see Willow, Xander, Giles, Andrew, and Buffy join the group. Buffy had been rather reclusive coming and going as she pleased. Faith hadn't seen her join them for dinner any of the times she had cooked. She was glad that Buffy had joined them. She knew Buffy kept herself at a distance from the girls and she understood the need to protect herself. Yet she also knew that the girls needed to have a bond with Buffy, needed to have confidence in Buffy in order to follow her. The thing Buffy didn't seem to understand was that the girls weren't soldiers; they wouldn't follow blindly and obey orders without objection. They were teenagers and emotional and argumentative. If Buffy wanted their support and respect then she had to earn it.

Getting up Faith went back to the kitchen to warm up some blood for Spike. She hadn't seen the vampire through most of the day and she knew he wasn't a big fan of hanging out with the potentials. Finishing her dinner while the blood warmed up Faith placed her dish in the sink grabbed the mug and went downstairs. She found the vampire smoking while starring out at nothing.

"Hey Spike." She said breaking his daze and handing him the mug.

"Hey." He said taking a sip and starring again at the emptiness.

Deciding the vampire wasn't in the mood to talk Faith shook her head and returned upstairs. The sink was already full. Going into the living room she told the girls that they could wash the dishes in the morning. She reminded them she would be there in the afternoon and to eat the fruit before it went bad. Walking out into the darkness Faith released a sigh at another long day before walking back to her apartment.


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note: Really I should just call this author's thanks to the few and awesome people who keep me going by putting in their two cents every time they review. Really I can't stress this enough; you guys are the ones who keep me writing. I hope ya'll like this chapter and I apologize it has taken me so long to update. I've edited this story a bit, cut some stuff out and changed directions a couple of times. It's hard to keep it going especially when I had originally thought I would never work on it again. I'd given up on it and trying to come up with a new plan is a lot more difficult then I would have thought. Well again thanks for the taking the time to review and I do take comments into consideration in writing chapters and in changing directions.

Walking down the streets of Sunnydale Faith had to admit that the town was empty. It felt as if she was walking through a ghost town, no people, no noise, and very few cars. It was convenient she supposed for her own plans. The town being empty meant she had free reign and all 'crimes' she planned on committing wouldn't get her in trouble.

Sunnydale had three banks and all three of them she planned to rob. From everything she had learned the hellmouth was under Sunnydale and if it was closed she suspected the town would collapse under itself. If that was the case she saw no reason not to take advantage. The whole group would need a fresh start. The Council was gone and they would no longer be available to fund the training of potentials. It would become the gang's job and since the gang was relatively poor they would need funds. The town of Sunnydale would be underground and its banks gone. What money lay within those banks would be insured so stealing it wouldn't really hurt anyone. The way she saw it insurance companies rarely if ever went broke and they deserved to pay out every once in a while.

Figuring since no one was really left in the town each robbery would be rather easy. All she would have to do was cut the power line to each bank. Using her lock picks to break into the bank and her skills at safe cracking she would be in and out in a matter of ten maybe fifteen minutes. She didn't know how much had been cleared from the vaults or the registers but she hoped it was enough to help the gang out when everything came to an end.

Going to the high school Faith called Robin and asked him which lab he had allocated to her. She spent most of her morning making a couple of small ranged explosives. It was dangerous and corrosive and she was glad no one else was in the lab in case she screwed up. Three hours later she had everything ready. Keeping the explosives at the school in a cabinet she made her way to the Summer's house to work with the girls.

Like the day before Kennedy had organized the girls and taken them on a run. Faith had to admit that even though the girl was a bit cocky she was a hard worker and more importantly she was eager to learn. Faith knew she would make an excellent slayer. Rounding up the girls in the backyard Faith broke the girls up into pairs. Each pair got a set of weapons to work with. She wanted them to focus on the long sword, quarterstaff, knives, mace, and crossbow. Setting up each station Faith walked back and forth between the groups correcting, instructing, and demonstrating.

She was doing her best to get to know each girl just a little. She knew some of them would die but she felt that they deserved the respect of being known. She didn't want them forgotten. She knew they didn't want to be here. She knew that they were afraid. She also knew that they needed to know someone cared. She had expected that person to be Buffy but it seemed the 'Leader' wasn't willing to socialize with the troops.

Finishing up with the girls before the sunset Faith walked them back into the house and got to work on dinner. Again she marveled that she had fallen into two roles she didn't particularly want to have. The first was leader by proxy and the second was mother to the girls. The girls helped cook dinner and it wasn't long before everyone was eating. Seeing to it that the girls would clean up after dinner Faith left. She had three banks to rob. With promises to return and take the girls out for a quick patrol Faith made her way out of the house and back to her apartment.

Grabbing a pair of black leather pants, black long sleeved top, and a face mask along with three duffle bags Faith made her way to the high school. Changing at the school Faith grabbed her homemade bombs and went to the first bank. As she had suspected it was easy enough to cut the power lines and even easier to break in. She knew that in a normal bank heist by cutting the power to the building she would in essence be setting off an alarm. The good part in this particular case was that there was no one around to respond to the alarm. Even the cops and firefighters had cleared out.

Going first to the cash drawers Faith broke into them and took out what little cash was inside. Each drawer had five hundred dollars and there were only three drawers. The vault was locked and it took Taffy only a couple of minutes to break it. Walking into the vault Faith shifted Taffy out of her mind and took out her bump key. Going through a couple of the safety deposit boxes she took out the few valuables before moving on to the banks cash vault. Sliding back into Taffy she cracked the second vault and opened the door. Looking into the bank Faith couldn't help but smile. It was full, the bank clearly hadn't had enough time to clear out the vault before everyone left. Grabbing her duffle bag Faith piled all the money into the bag. Part of her wanted to count it but the other part figured she could do that later when she checked for any marked bills.

Looking at her watch as she walked out of the bank with two of the duffle bags full Faith let out a small curse. It had taken her twenty minutes to rob the bank. She had missed her mark by five minutes. It was clear some of her skills were becoming a little rusting. Making her way back to her apartment Faith dropped of the two bags and picked up another two for the next bank.

Three hours later and six full bags worth of cash sitting in her apartment Faith was ready to return to HQ. Changing back into less suspicious clothes Faith walked back a little tune playing over and over in her head. She had to admit she was actually a little happy. Everything seemed to be going her way for a change. It seemed that working through an apocalypse was a great way to work through grief. The thought of Paul made her smile slip a little. She missed him or at least the part of her that was Echo missed him. She always wondered how much of her love for Paul came from herself or from Echo. Strange to think that there were so many people in her head and that one of them in particular was just a creation of her own brain. A method of coping she suspected from the loss of her actual self. Shaking her head she had to admit it was all so Meta.

Entering the house Faith was surprised to see everyone gathering into the living room. Seems someone called a meeting and forgot to tell her. Looking around at the group she failed to see Spike. He didn't hang out with the potentials but he did attend meetings. Searching for Giles, Faith spotted him by the fireplace.

"Giles, where did Spike go?" She asked wondering where the vampire had snuck off to.

"Well we found some interesting things on Caleb and I asked him and Andrew to go check it out last night." Giles said looking over a file.

Faith wondered when that had happened and how she had missed it. She figured he must have been sent off while she was breaking in and robbing the banks. Releasing a sigh of mild frustration Faith got down to business. "So what did you find out about the preacher?"

"A couple of days ago Willow and I went to the police and had them get what we think is Caleb's Interpol file. It didn't' provide as much information as we would have liked but it might have given us a clue about Caleb. I sent Spike and Andrew to a church someone of Caleb's description was reported to have been. We won't know what they found out until tomorrow night." He said getting up and walking into the dining room. "What's all this?" He asked looking at the tape recorders and receivers on the table.

"Faith bugged the vineyard." Dawn said looking over a couple of books. The receivers were silent.

"When? How?" Giles asked looking at Faith.

"Yesterday." She said.

"How did you get into the vineyard?" Giles asked a note of suspicion tinting his voice.

"Set up a couple of chargers off in the back of the building and when the Bringers came out I went in. They should last at least 48 hours maybe longer if there isn't that much going on." She said turning around and going to the kitchen. Grabbing a cup of coffee Faith snuck back out onto the porch. She didn't smoke often but she realized that she had smoked more in Sunnydale than she did throughout her entire life. She suspected it was something about the town that made her feel so stressed out. Years of combat and fighting for every scrap in a hostile world hadn't made her as tense as this town did.

"Hey you know that habit will kill you." He said taking a seat on the front porch.

Smiling Faith lit up her cigarette and took a seat further down. "Yeah but with all the crap I've been through I feel I deserve the occasional smoke."

"I guess you're right." He said watching her.

"Hey I really appreciate you getting those materials I requested and for letting me use the schools lab. Hell if we live through all of this maybe I will take you out to dinner as a thank you." She said finishing up her cigarette and standing up. Throwing out her smoke she opened the door and motioned him in. The troops were gathered and Buffy must have come down while she was outside. Taking a seat on the stairs Faith kept an ear out for the receivers and an eye on the girls.

Buffy stood a few feet into the living room and addressed the troops. "I'm glad you're all here. I've learned several important things about the vineyard." Seeing the tension spike in the room Buffy stopped and changed tactics. "I know that wasn't a very pleasant night for any of us." She started only to be interrupted by Kennedy.

"Wasn't pleasant for us? You led us into trap with a man who is stronger than you. He kicked your ass and if it wasn't for Faith we all would have died." Kennedy burst out angry at Buffy.

"Kennedy, stand down." Faith said looking the girl in the eye.

"I figured out something today. I went to the school and had an encounter with Caleb. He was going on and on about the seal and that's when I finally saw it." Buffy continued as if Kennedy hadn't interrupted her.

"Saw what Buffy?" Willow asked confused.

"The bad guys always go to their source of power. If the seal was so important he would be guarding the seal, instead he's guarding the vineyard. Its clear there is something important, something powerful in that vineyard. We have to go back."

Everyone stared at Buffy as if she was out of her mind. Faith on the other hand merely nodded her head. She agreed with Buffy even though she disliked the methods Buffy used.

"This is asking too much of us Buffy, of them."Giles said staring at Buffy in confusion and disappointment.

"I'm not going back in there." Kennedy said outraged. "None of us are going back in there."

"We have to go back in. We have to get whatever it is he has." Buffy said forcefully.

"You're chasing windmills Buffy." Giles said shaking his head.

"You're waiting for some kind of mystical sign to show up and tell us it's the right time, that sort of thing almost never happens, least, not for us. We need to strike now." Buffy says looking at her watcher as if he is stabbing her in the back.

"And I think whatever is there, if anything is there, will still be there in a few days." Giles counters.

"I don't know that. We don't know that. What if we let it go and we lose our chance? I'm not prepared to live with that." Buffy says looking at everyone.

"And if we rush in now, before we're ready, and more people get hurt, are you prepared to live with that?" Wood asked ignoring the annoyed look from Buffy. "You need to consider this."

"I don't understand. Seven years I've kept us safe by doing this, exactly this, making the hard decisions. Suddenly, you're all acting like you don't trust me." She said staring at her friends.

"But didn't you just tell me today that you don't feel like you can trust us? Maybe there's something going on that we need to address." Giles said his voice firm.

"Is this why you sent Spike away? To ambush me?" Buffy asked confused and outraged.

"Look around you, this isn't about Spike. This is about you. You're being reckless." Rona says quietly.

"What?"

"You are. I don't even know you, and I can tell. You're so obsessed with beating this guy that you're willing to jump into any plan without thinking." Rona says getting more and more ticked off.

"That's not what I'm doing." Buffy says becoming defensive.

"Well, that's how it feels to us!" Kennedy says jumping up and getting into Buffy's face. "You don't know us, you don't care about us, and yet you want us to go off and get killed so you can get this thing that you don't know is or isn't there." Kennedy says getting closer to Buffy only to have Willow step in between them. Buffy looks relieved for the support. "Why are you always defending her?" Kennedy asks looking angry and betrayed.

"Just calm down Kennedy, it's clear she's strung out. Once she gets some rest I'm sure she'll be fine." Willow says pulling Kennedy back to the couch.

"Look, I wish this could be a democracy. I really do. It would be more fair, I agree. But democracies don't win battles. It's a hard truth, but there has to be a single voice. You need me to issue orders and be reckless sometimes and not take your feelings into account." Buffy said looking at everyone. "You need someone to lead you." She says confidently.

"And it's automatically you. You really do think you're better than we are." Anya starts and stops Buffy every time she tries to interrupt. "You do. Of course you do. That's why it's your voice leading us. But we don't know, do we? We'll never know. That you're actually better. You came into the world with certain advantages, sure, that's the legacy. But you didn't earn them. You didn't work for them. You never had someone come to you and say, Here, you deserve these more than anyone else. There were just…handed to you. And that doesn't make you better than us. It makes you luckier than us." Anya said staring Buffy down.

"That's enough." Faith said breaking the silence that had fallen among the group.

"No it's not enough. Anya is right what makes Buffy the automatic choice for leader. From what I've seen you've been doing more for us than she has." Kennedy said getting back up and moving towards Faith. "You've been training us, you've actually taken the time to get to know us, and you are the one who saved our ass in that cellar." Kennedy said getting louder, her words encouraging nods of approval from the rest of the potentials. "And where Buffy has been busy getting her ass handed to her by Caleb you've been working towards figuring out what he's up to."

"I am still responsible for this group. I am still in charge here." Buffy said hoping to regain her authority.

"And why is that, exactly?" Rona asked.

"Because I'm the Slayer." Buffy said.

"And isn't Faith a Slayer, too?" Rona asked looking at Faith with a bit of hope.

"Okay and now this little meeting is over. I am not taking charge of all of you." Faith starts only to be interrupted by the Mayor of Sunnydale walking into the room.

"You never were the take charge type were you Faithy?" He asked jovially. "You were always a solo player, the lone wolf. It's what made it so easy to get you to come work for me." He said walking up to Faith.

"Hey Boss." Faith said with a smile. "You know I have to admit I have missed you. If it wasn't for the fact that you are the First I would even be a little happy to see you."

"How about me Faith are you happy to see me?" The First asked shifting into Faith's watcher after Kakistos had tortured her. The whole room gasped and Faith stared her eye's blank.

"You can haunt me as much as you like. You can stand there and tell the whole room about everything I've done. It really doesn't matter to me. Hell I'll do it for you." Faith said looking at her dead watcher as it shifted to Allen Finch. "This is Allen Finch everyone, I accidently killed him with a stake. Buffy threw him at me and I didn't have time to tell he was human. So I rammed a stake into his heart and he died within a couple of seconds. Then I killed Professor Wirth. He was a volcanologist. I knocked on his door and when he opened it I gutted him. It was rather messy but I was trying to make an impression." Faith said looking at the slightly shocked faces of the group she smiled and continued. "However, Mr. First you don't know about all the other people I have killed. I've used a variety of methods too. I once had a man who was as innocent as a child hold a bomb and count to ten before letting it go. He died obviously and took a whole building out with him. I've strangled more than one person to death; I've stabbed people, shot people, and snapped a few necks. I'm not innocent but I'm not evil. You can try all you want but I will help take you down." Faith said getting closer to the First.

"Not if I can help it." The First said shifting forms before disappearing.

"Well that was interesting." Faith said looking at the place where the First had been. "Anyways back to what I was saying. I'm not going to lead you. That isn't my role and it isn't a role I want. I have spent six years leading people to their deaths and I have no desire to do it again. However, I do agree with you all that Buffy needs to stop, think and listen." She said turning away from the girls and looking at Buffy. "We don't need a General and I'm not a soldier regardless of whether or not we are fighting a war. I'll follow you but you will listen to what I say, to what we all say. It is our lives on the line along with yours, so if we are going to die, we are going to have a voice." Faith stopped waiting for Buffy to show some sign of acknowledgement.

The two stared at each other for several moments before Buffy turned to the rest of the group to judge their reaction. Looking back at Faith, Buffy nodded. "Good now not to burst the bubble you all had." Faith said looking at the group. "But I agree with Buffy because I've seen it. The preacher is digging up something that was under the vineyard. I don't know how long it will take for them to dig it out but once they do we have no chance at getting it. Now I don't know what it is but from the preacher's reactions to me getting too close to the entrance I agree that it's important. Now we have to make a plan on how to get into that building. Mine currently is running along the lines of blowing it up. I've stolen enough C-4 from the army base to do just that. Now I say we blow it up, kill the remaining Bringers and get whatever is in there." Faith said smiling at the group.

"You're insane!" Giles said looking at Faith then Buffy. "You're both insane." He said taking off his glasses. At that moment the lights went out leaving the whole room in darkness.

"Kennedy, Molly, Vi please get the flashlights, lanterns, and candles I brought over the other day." Faith said and the aforementioned girls immediately got up and went to the closet to grab everything.

In a couple of minutes lanterns were lit and candles. Faith looked at the group and smiled. "Well I might be insane but at least I was prepared Mr. Giles. Now as I said before I find the easiest way would be to blow the vineyard up."

"Do you even know what you're doing? I mean after listening to you talk about how you've murdered people I don't believe you have been rehabilitated." Giles said outraged at Faith's calm behavior.

"Would you rather I had lied? The Council sent me to a dimension where the world ended. We had reapers scavenging through the cities. Have you ever seen a reaper? No of course not because they don't exist here. Reapers were a byproduct of the wipe on normals. Humans who lost all sense of their humanity and began killing and eating people. They were alive and if I didn't kill them I would have been killed. Do I have an issue killing humans? No. After spending years killing people so that I could save humanity has desensitized me. Now is it a good idea to blow up the vineyard? Yes, it's quick, it's easy and it will prevent these girls from getting killed. Do I know what I'm doing? Yes, I've used C-4 more than once." Faith said staring at Giles. Deciding she has had enough of the dirty looks and animosity and doubt coming from these people she decides to go with the truth.

"Do you know what the Council did to me? Do you have any idea of the hell I've been through?" She asks moving closer to Giles. "And now you stand there and think you have the right to judge me and my actions? Do you want to know how the Council planned to rehabilitate me? They gave me to a corporation who removed everything that made me Faith and stuck me onto a hard drive. The plan was to take me out of storage after five years, edit out the bad parts and put me back in as the good slayer they desired. Do you know what happened to my body during that time?" Faith asked looking at Giles before shifting her attention to Willow, Xander, and Buffy. Receiving disbelieving shakes she continued.

"They implanted different people into my mind, into my body. I was a toy, I was a doll. People bought me for a night, for a week, for a month. I became whatever they fantasized about, whatever they needed. I'm not as lucky as the other dolls, the implants never wiped clean. I have 46 people in my head. I have saved a world and honestly you all have no right to judge me." Faith said looking Giles in the eyes. "Now it's been a very long night and we have all heard more than enough. I need to go to my apartment and pick up my supplies. I promise I won't accidently blow up the house." Faith said with a smile and walked to the door.

Walking into her apartment Faith packed up the C-4 and detonators alone with a couple of changes of clothes. Locking up the apartment she said goodbye to it and started back towards HQ as she had come to think of it.

"Did you send the boys to get her?" Buffy's voice said over the transmitter. Everyone turned and looked into the dining room and then to Buffy. In a rush the originals walked into the dining room.

"I did they should have her by now." Caleb said with confidence.

"Good, I had hoped to weaken her connection with them, to bring her over to our side voluntarily but I don't think that is going to happen. If I had known she was so easy to turn before I would have focused on her instead of the Original. Now she's not so weak, not so malleable. We have to turn her." The First said.

"How do you plan on doing that?" Caleb asked with a bit of wonder.

"Well you'll have to soften her up first. I would think a little bit of torture would make her a bit more acquiescent. Then, well then you have a very important job to do. The Bringers will perform the spell for you then all you have to do is implant a seed of darkness. Once she turns the Scythe will turn. Then you can take it. Then you can kill her and the line will end. No slayer will be called." The First said and Caleb chuckled. "I hope you are up to the task."

The voices moved further away and the room was left in silence. The whole house was silent as everyone processed what they had heard. Buffy looked at Giles and the other before staring at the transmitter. Dawn finally spoke up breaking the tension filled silence. "They are going after Faith." She said stating what everyone was thinking.

Gathering the troops Buffy led everyone onto the streets of Sunnydale to search for Faith. Two hours later they all reconvened back at the house. There was no sign of Faith. Dawn was sitting at the dining room table worry and fear etching the lines of her face. She had stayed behind to listen, to see if it was true that the Bringers had gotten to Faith.

"Dawnie?" Buffy asked hoping against logic that Faith was safe. Dawn shook her head.

"They got her. I don't know if the transmitters aren't working properly or if she is being kept in a room away from the bugs. All I hear is the occasional muffled groan, moan, and scream. I don't know what he's doing to her but I know it's not good." Dawn said looking at her sister with a touch of despair.

"Start the spell." They heard the First say in Buffy's voice.

The chanting started and Willow got closer hoping to hear enough to be able to determine what spell they were going to perform. It was muffled and she only got the occasional word. Listening intently Willow wrote down every word she could decipher. The chant seemed to go on forever and Willow still had no idea what type of spell they were casting. Finally the Bringers stopped and Willow looked down at her notes. Of course they made no sense and she knew it would be a while before she would even have a slight idea at what it said.

Everyone stood around the table listening to the muffled screams, each cringing as their imaginations ran rampant. They had run to the vineyard once they realized Faith was there but the place was swarming with Bringers. They surrounded the vineyard and Buffy knew it would be suicide to walk into the building. Using force and the occasional harsh word she had gotten the girls back to the house. Buffy wanted to get Faith back as much as the potentials did, but she knew it was impossible at the moment.

It had been hours since they had returned. Buffy was tired of hearing Faith's muffled pain. It made her feel helpless to hear Faith in so much pain and not be able to do anything about it. She felt useless and that made her angry. They finally had a plan, they were finally close to getting whatever it was that Caleb had, and now it was ruined. Part of her blamed Faith for being so foolish as to walk the streets alone at night and the other part blamed Faith for not listening to her about staying at the house. Unwilling to admit it out loud she was also afraid that she was going to lose Faith.

It had been so long since she had seen Faith. That old feeling of security and connection, of belonging had finally started to return and she had just realized how much she had missed it. She was only now realizing how much she had missed Faith. Her feelings were flying in every direction and that was making her crazy.

"How long will it take?" Caleb asked making everyone perk up.

"As long as it would normally take I would think. The spell wasn't to make her turn; it was to give you the opportunity to turn her. I make no guarantees that it will work but she is young enough and if we are lucky it will work." The First said in Buffy's voice.

"Is there any way for me to keep it?" Caleb asked his voice going soft with wonder.

"No this time there isn't. It could be powerful I will admit, a mixture of my essence and hers but I want the slayer line ended more than I want it." The First said.

The silence that filled the air waves made everyone stare at the transmitter hoping to hear something, anything. Instead Faith's muffled moans floated through.

"What the fuck did that mean?" Kennedy asked breaking the silence. The moans of pain had taken on a new meaning in her mind and she prayed to God that what she was hearing wasn't what she thought it was. It was too horrible to think and yet… and yet the First had said mixture of essences and an it. Shaking those terrible thoughts out of her head Kennedy refused to think about it.

Her words however had brought her thoughts out into the open and she could see that everyone was thinking something along the same lines as she. Getting up Kennedy made up her mind; they needed to save Faith.


	12. Chapter 12

Author's Note: I've been posting more and making less chapters on this site since I find it's a bit of a pain cutting and pasting to upload chapters. So those of you who read this site instead of the other get a I think a little more per chapter. Anyways thanks for the reads and the reviews. Since so few people actually bother to read this story I don't feel it is necessary to keep chapters to myself after they have been written.

Sadly it means I occasionally want to go back and rearrange things but it's already posted and that makes it a pain. I think one day when I have nothing to do I will go back print this out and rewrite and edit the whole thing. Thanks again everyone.

Faith was hanging back up from her arms. She was tired and she was in pain. Everything hurt. There wasn't a place on her entire body that didn't ache. She was torn, she was bleeding, and she was sore. She thought of death momentarily but the conviction to destroy Caleb and the First had slowly drilled itself into her head every time they came into the cave. That's what it was to her considering she was surrounded by stone. Behind her she could see the thing the Bringers had been digging out of the stone. It was almost completely out and Faith knew with one good tug it would be free.

Looking up Faith studied her chains. She was hung five inches from the ground and the chains were screwed into the stone above her. Putting her weight on one arm Faith began to twist her right manacle to the left. It tightened and tightened but eventually she felt a give from up above.

It felt like hours, days, weeks, and years before she felt the chain give enough. Lifting her arm Faith yanked softly over and over until the chain came free. As it fell to the ground Faith collected as much as she could in the hope of muffling the sound of it falling. Using both arms she slowly and insistently tugged on her remaining chain. It felt like eternity before it came out of the ceiling. Catching the whole chain Faith made her way to the thing in the stone. Yanking it out she felt the power surge into her, she knew without a doubt that it belonged to her. Looking around the room Faith found her bag and her smile only got wider.

Using the axe part of the weapon or scythe as she had heard the First calling it Faith broke the manacles around her wrists. Walking over to her bag she pulled out the C-4. Taking all the charges out she lined them up in front of her and started making charges. Six large charges later she smiled as she set the timers. She had one shot and she had every intention of making it out of the vineyard alive. Setting down the one minute charge Faith turned all the timers on and started running. She had a minute and twenty eight seconds to get out of the building.

She saw Caleb talking to First (Buffy) again but she ignored them. She ignored the Bringers as they moved and began to follow her. Dropping a charge every couple of steps Faith ran for all she was worth. Charging up the stairs Faith grabbed the Bringer at the top of the stair. Shoving the last charge into his hand she flung him down the stairs and ran.

The first charge went off and she knew she had run out of time. The force of the explosion hit Faith's back throwing her away from the building. Slamming into the ground Faith wished desperately that she had, had enough time to put on some clothes. Her already sore and bleeding body had managed to get even more torn and bloody. Turning onto her side Faith looked at the burning heap and smiled. She hoped Caleb had been in the building and that he hadn't managed to hide or get away. The copious amounts of wine inside the building would only make it that much hotter and hopefully that would be enough to kill the sadistic preacher.

Feeling a set of hands grab her arms Faith moaned out in despair. She didn't have the strength to fight Caleb and the Scythe was in her bag. She was helpless and she knew that she had failed. He was going to kill her. Faith waited for the fatal blow but it never came. Instead several sets of hands grabbed a hold of her and helped her up.

"Oh my God Faith, you're alive, thank God you're alive." Faith heard Kennedy say before a set of strong arms lifted her up. A jacket was placed around her to cover her nakedness. Pulling her bag to the front Faith clutched it with one arm and the other she wrapped around the person holding her. She could tell from the body temperature that it was Spike and that made her smile before she fell into oblivion.

Buffy paced back and forth her mind in a whirl of emotion. They had arrived ready to die to save Faith only to watch the building blow up and a dark haired woman get thrown into the woods. They had rushed to Faith and Buffy's heart had flown into her throat. Faith was naked. She was also bruised and bloody.

Unable to do anything but stare in shock Buffy watched as Kennedy had checked on Faith. She had watched as the others helped Faith up and she had watched as Spike lifted Faith up. Robin took off his jacket and covered her and in silence they had all walked back to the house. Now she paced back and forth. She had been too agitated to help take care of Faith's wounds. Every time she had looked at the bruises and the cuts and the blood she had been forced to move away from Faith. Finally Willow had kicked her out.

Stopping she stared at the door as it opened. Willow stepped out and closed the door behind her. "Is she going to be okay?" Buffy asked her voice catching.

"I don't know. Will she live? Yes. But I don't know how in the world she will ever be okay again. Buffy…." Willow stops unable to go on. "That bastard…." She starts and stops again unable to finish her sentence. The myriad of bruising and bleeding that she had treated are burned into her mind. The meaning of what she had seen making her feel sick. Shaking her head Willow stopped. She couldn't say it. She couldn't tell everyone something that happened to Faith that was so painful, so personal.

"So it's what we all thought?" Buffy asked unable to say the words either. The slight nod from Willow was enough. Buffy released a sigh when she really just wanted to scream.

The two women walked downstairs and their faces were enough for the rest to know the truth. Yet it was an unspoken truth. None of them wanted to talk about it and they all knew Faith well enough to know that they shouldn't mention it unless she did. Instead they all became quiet and settled down for the night. Faith was back and safe, and the vineyard along with several Bringers was gone. There was nothing they could do for Faith so they would all get some rest.

Buffy walked back upstairs and quietly entered her room. Faith was covered in a sheet. She was pale and for a moment Buffy was afraid that she had died. She was so quiet and so still. Getting closer to the bed Buffy saw Faith breathe and in turn she released a breath of relief. Changing into a pair of pajamas Buffy slid into bed next to Faith. She wanted nothing more in the world than to hold her fellow slayer but she denied herself. She didn't know how Faith would react and the last thing she wanted was to frighten her fellow slayer. Instead she laid back and hoped Faith would be alright.

Waking up Buffy feels a source of warmth against her front. Opening her eyes she realizes that she shifted during the night and wrapped herself around Faith. Lifting up Buffy stares down at Faith. The young woman is still unconscious and the bruises on her face are more pronounced. Releasing a sigh Buffy brushes her fingers along Faith's brow. She marvels at how strong her fellow slayer is, marvels at how much Faith has survived.

Faith had not entered her mind over the last several years but now she seems to be the only thing going through Buffy's mind. She can't help but wonder at the kind of life Faith had been forced to live. It's clear that Faith had changed. Buffy wasn't sure if it was all for the better though. She still had a hard time wrapping her mind around the fact that Faith had no issues with killing. It went against her own nature so she couldn't help but think it was wrong of Faith. Then again she rationalized that she had never lived in a world where humans were in essence the demons.

Getting up Buffy went to the bathroom. Thankfully most of the girls were still asleep. The house was rather eerily silent. A rarity since all the potentials had slowly moved in. She would have relished the silence if it wasn't for Faith. She couldn't help but be worried that her counterpart hadn't woken up. Willow had given an account of Faith's injuries excluding the one no one wanted to talk about or what it implicated. Faith had three cracked ribs, a broken wrist, severe bruising, a cracked skull, several cuts and she had lost a lot of blood. Knowing Faith's history of coma's she couldn't help but worry that Faith had fallen into another one.

Going back to her room Buffy's attention was attracted to the bag Faith had been carrying. Kneeling on the floor she unzipped the bag and gasped. It was an ax with a stake at the end. It was beautiful and something inside her knew with absolute certainty that it belonged to her. Looking up at Faith, Buffy wanted to cry. Faith had managed to get the thing that Caleb had. She knew without a doubt in her mind that the weapon in front of her was important.

Lifting it up out of the bag Buffy brought it downstairs. Giles was in the kitchen talking softly to Willow. The looks on both their faces told Buffy that the topic of conversation was Faith. Interrupting the two Buffy showed them the weapon. Handing it to Giles she asked him to find out as much as he could about it.

"So this is what was inside the vineyard? This is what the preacher was protecting?" Giles asked as he looked over the weapon.

"Yes I think so. I knew there was something important in that vineyard. He was guarding it way too well Giles." Buffy said starring at the weapon. "I'm not sure exactly what it is but I know it's powerful. I can feel it."

"Well we will look into it. How is Faith doing?" He asked looking away from the weapon in his hands.

"I don't know she hasn't woken up yet." Buffy said keeping as much emotion out of her voice as possible.

"Let's hope she wakes up soon." Giles said grabbing his tea and making his way upstairs.

"Are you okay?" Willow asked seeing the frown pucker Buffy's brow.

"Honestly no. I mean I wanted to get that thing but I didn't want it to cost as much as it did." Buffy paused her anger building thinking of what probably happened to Faith. "I mean why did she have to go off on her own Will? Why couldn't she just listen to me? Why didn't she stay here with us?" Buffy asked her voice becoming shaky with emotion.

"Because she is Faith and Buffy she is an adult and she is more than capable of making her own decisions. She came here to help you and she has. She's worked with the girls. She's helped around the house. She has taken up the slack you've left behind." Willow stopped and looked at her friend. "I know you don't want to hear this but Faith has been the one keeping these girls here. You've been away doing your own thing and they have been faltering while you were gone. I know you are worried about Faith and I am too. But right now you have to focus on the girls. This might be the final straw for them." Willow said knowing that Faith was the glue in their little group. She kept the girls active; she made the girls want to fight the war. Now with Faith out of commission the girls would falter, would lose their motivation for fighting.

Nodding Buffy walked down to the basement. Everyone was still asleep and she felt a need to talk to someone. Walking to the bed Buffy took a seat next to Spike. She felt broken, as if she had lost something very important. The tears came before she could stop them. Soon her body was torn with sobs and she felt Spike wrap his arms around her and pull her close. She welcomed the comfort even as it made her cry harder. Even as she thought of the other arms she would rather have holding her at that moment.

Night had fallen and the girls were either tucked into bed or in Buffy's room watching Faith. No training had been done and Buffy had managed to avoid the girls throughout the day. She had wanted to talk to them, to get to know them but she just couldn't. She couldn't bear the reality of the future. They were going to die, some of them if not all of them. How could she get to know them if she knew that they were marked for death? How would she be able to bear the guilt of knowing she had led them to that death?

Buffy had to admit that Faith was better fitted for that job. She got along with the girls. It was clear that Faith was able to handle the guilt. Walking into Willow's bedroom Buffy looked at Giles and Willow. They had been busy researching all day and had finally come up with something about the Scythe as they had called it.

"So what do we know?" She asked locking her emotions out and getting down to business.

"Not enough but we have some ideas. It's pre-Christian and we think Egyptian in origin. What we do know is that before the vineyard was a vineyard it was a monastery. We are presuming that the monks placed it there but for what reason we are unsure. Overall we don't know that much about it or it's origins. Since it's of pagan origin we figured you would need to find a religious area in unconsecrated ground. I know that's not much to go on but since it was placed here we have to assume the place of worship is also somewhere in Sunnydale." Willow said handing the Scythe over to Buffy.

Nodding her head at the two researched Buffy grabbed the Scythe and made her way downstairs. She wanted to check in on Faith but didn't want to face the girls. If there was any change in Faith's condition the girls would surely tell her. Walking through the darkened kitchen Buffy did her best to keep quiet as she snuck out of the house.

"You're leaving?" Spike asks coming up from the basement.

Starring at him she just nods her head.

"Another secret mission?" He asks in a vain attempt to be nonchalant. "Do you need help?"

"No." She states simply.

"So that's how it's going to be then?" He asks becoming a little annoyed.

"Spike please don't start with this. I'm tired of the mixed signals and the defensive attitude. You've been my rock through most of this and you know that." She says hoping to comfort him in some way.

"Yeah I've been your rock, I've been the one to comfort you, and I've been the one fighting on your side. Yet I'm the one you keep secrets from. I'm the one you keep pushing away."

"I know how you feel about me and you know I care about you. I just I don't know how I feel about you exactly. You are important to me. Do you think I would have gone down there today if you weren't? I know you feel like I'm hiding things from you but this is a secret mission for a reason. We don't know who the First is and can be and we don't know when it's listening so secret mission it is. When I come back and I've learned a little more I promise I'll share." She said coming closer and giving him a light kiss on the lips.

Nodding his acceptance Spike watched her turn away and walk out the door and into the night. He gave her a couple of minutes before sneaking out after her. Keeping to the shadows he followed her through several cemeteries and finally to an Egyptian looking tomb. He wondered how he had failed to find the place over all the years he had spent wandering the cemeteries of Sunnydale. Walking to the trees that surrounded the little oasis of dilapidated unmarked graves he hid. He had no idea the size of the tomb and he didn't want Buffy to spot him.

Hidden in the shadows Spike desperately wanted to move closer. It was pure strength of will that kept him from moving especially when he saw a burnt up preacher walking into the tomb. Instead he kept his place thinking Buffy needed to defeat the preacher on her own. She needed the confidence that she had lost bit by bit as she had faced off with the preacher. More than anything Spike knew that Buffy needed to avenge what the preacher had done to Faith. He knew the tears she had cried into his arms that day were for the dark slayer. The sense of complete despair and helplessness was one he had felt on more than one occasion.

He wanted a piece of the preacher himself. He had grown to like the dark slayer. Faith had a sense of life that filled a room. She had clearly seen more than one lifetimes worth of pain and suffering yet she didn't let it destroy her. Instead Spike could see that Faith made the best of every situation. She was a survivor more than that she was a strong leader. When he had lifted the dark slayer into his arms he had known immediately what the preacher had done to her. He could smell it and part of him had raged. Part of him had wanted to rush into the burning vineyard and make sure the preacher was dead and if not dead drag him out and torture him to death.

Yet all he had been able to do was carry her hope. He hadn't even been able to care for her wounds and when he had walked up to Buffy's room to check on her the potentials had denied him the right. As if he was unworthy of sitting next to their fallen hero. He hated them in that moment. Hated that they felt he was untrustworthy after all he had done.

A new figure walking towards the tomb brought him out of his reverie. He was shocked to see Angel. The poof was supposed to be in Los Angeles not wandering around Sunnydale. Waiting until the poof walked into the tomb Spike moved closer. He hears muffled voices and slowly inches himself down the stairs. The scuffling and grunts tell him that Buffy is fighting the preacher. He listens as Angel offers a commentary and wishes he could stake the bastard.

His un-beating heart aches as he hears Buffy walk up to Angel. It breaks as he watches her kiss him. He knew that they would always be attracted to each other. He knew that Buffy was rather indecisive when it came to her lovers. Yet he wished he didn't know. He wished it didn't hurt to watch her run back to Angel as if nothing had ever happened. He wished the First wasn't whispering in his ear. Turning around Spike walks away in disgust.

Buffy looks at the corpse of the burned preacher with a slight smirk of satisfaction wishing he had suffered more than he had. Overall she had to admit the preacher had gotten a quicker death than he had deserved. If it wasn't for the fact that he was still rather powerful she would have done her best to beat the living shit out of him before she had killed him. Instead she had the satisfaction in knowing that he wouldn't be hurting anyone again especially not Faith.

Turning to Angel she smiled again. She was happy to see him, ecstatic even. Cleaning of the blade of the scythe she watches as he pulls out a folder. He hands them to her and she slides the scythe under one are so she can scan the papers.

"I'll have the guys run through this, see if there's anything new. Reliable source?" She asks getting back to business.

"Not remotely."

"Well, any port in an apocalypse…"

"I brought something else as well." He says pulling out an amulet out of his pocket.

"I can already tell you I don't have anything that goes with that." She says with a smile.

"It's not for you." He says and smiles at her confused look and use of the word "splainy". "I don't know everything. It's very powerful and probably very dangerous. Has a purifying power…or a cleansing power- or possibly scrubbing bubbles, the translation is…anyway it bestows strength, worn by the right person." He finishes staring at the amulet and then at Buffy.

"And the right person is…"Buffy says encouraging him to finish his sentence or train of thought.

"Someone ensouled, but stronger than human. A champion. As in me." He says with a bit of a cocky attitude.

"Or me." She counters.

"No. I don't know nearly enough about this to risk you wearing it. Besides you've already got that cool axe-thing." He says keeping the amulet away from her.

"So you're gonna be with me in this." She states matter of fact.

"Shoulder to shoulder. I'm yours." He says the underlying meaning coming through loud and clear.

"No." She states emphatically.

"No what?" Angel asks clearly confused at the sudden change.

"Cause I can't risk you." She says shaking her head.

"You need me in this." He points out.

"No, I need you gone."

"Why?" Angel asks looking at her with a touch of pleading along with the confusion.

Stopping and staring at Angel Buffy thinks about how to say everything she is thinking. "If I lose…if this gets past Sunnydale, then it's day, or hours, before the rest of the world is gone. I need a second front, and I need you to run it." She says hoping he understands.

"If I'm here we have a better shot at capping this thing. I've read the files…" He says only to be cut off.

"Well I've lived the files and i…if I can't win this…it's my fight, Angel. It might be my last but it's mine." She states waiting for him to understand.

"Okay. That's one reason. What's the other?" He asks sensing there is more going on than she is willing to tell him.

"There is no other reason." Buffy says before walking away.

Staring after her Angel knows she's lying. Chasing after her he calls out. "Is it Spike?" She stops and turns. It's clear she's not overly anxious to talk to him about it. That alone tells him he's right. Approaching slowly he keeps his face as neutral as possible. "You're not telling me something. And…his scent. I remember it pretty well."

"You vampires…did anybody ever tell you that the whole smelling everybody thing is a little gross." Buffy says making a face of disgust.

"Is he your boyfriend?" Angel begins to interrogate.

"Is this your business?" She counters.

"Are you in love with him?" Angel questions incredulously. "Maybe I'm out of line, but this is kind of a curveball for me. We are talking about Spike here."

"It's different. He's different. He has a soul now." Buffy says unable to explain her strange relationship with Spike.

"Oh, well." Angel says with a touch of sarcasm.

"What." Buffy says becoming defensive.

"No, no that's great." Angel says before mumbling "Everyones' got a **soul **now." He face a little pouty and petulant.

"What are you, pissed?" Buffy asks staring at Angel as if he has lost his mind.

"No, it's great. One for our side."

"He'll make a difference." She tells him.

"You know, I started it." Angel says almost to himself. "The whole…having a soul. Before it was all the 'cool new thing'…"

"Oh my god, are you twelve?" Buffy asks incredulous of the preteen attitude.

"I'm getting the brush off for Captain Peroxide, it doesn't bring out the champion in me." He said with a slight pout.

"It's not the brush off. Having both of you here would be …confusing." She said unable to fully explain how she felt about having two ex lovers growling for her attention.

"For who?" He asked wanting some form of clarification.

"Everybody!" She practically shouted lifting her arms up in frustration. "Why are you so…are you gonna come by and get all Dawson on me every time I have a boyfriend?"

"Aha! Boyfriend!"Angel crowed.

"He's not!"She denied vehemently. "But…" She starts only to pause and think about it. "He is in my heart."

"That'll end well." Angel said a touch of sarcasm marring his words.

"And What was the highlight of our relationship?" She questions stressing their relationship part. "The time you broke up with me or the time I killed you?" She asks taking the fight out of both of them. Leaning against a crypt Buffy places the files on top of it and looks to Angel. "I'm well aware of my stellar history with guys, and no, I don't see fat grandchildren in the offing with Spike, but…I don't think that matters right now." She pauses trying to think out what to say to explain how she has been feeling. "You know, in the midst of all this…insanity, a couple of things are actually starting to make sense. And the guy thing…" She says pausing again trying to find the words to make everything make sense to Angel. "I always thought something was wrong with me because I always failed to make things work. Now I think I've finally realized that there is nothing wrong with me just that something was always missing. I didn't even realize what that thing was until it came back into my life." She says looking out over all the graves.

"You mean Faith?" Angel asks confused about where Buffy is going.

"Yeah…" She says pausing trying to get the words in her head to come out making sense. "When Faith first came around I was so jealous of her of what she represented and what it felt like she was taking away from me. Yet even through all that there was something about her that made me happy. She brought out the life in me, she got me to enjoy being a slayer, instead of feeling like it was a burden. Around her it didn't feel like a burden. When Faith came I finally felt a sense of belonging, I suddenly didn't feel so alone in the world. When she disappeared I didn't even realize that the sensation of comfort, of belonging, of being connected with someone was gone. The last couple of years I've felt as if I've been in a daze. My emotions have been muted and since I came back from the dead the feelings have gotten even worse.

"When I saw her again it all started coming back to me. As much as I have been fighting her, fighting these feelings I've finally realized that she's the missing link. I don't know if we are meant for me or even friendship but I know I need her. She makes that yawning emptiness in my stomach disappear. Now as she's stuck lying down unconscious in my bed I feel that gapping emptiness coming back to swallow me whole and I've realized that I might just be in love with her." Buffy finished confessing feeling the weight sliding off her shoulders as she finally revealed her emotions. She would have preferred talking to Faith about her feelings but she knew that wasn't a possibility at the moment.

"I guess I should have seen this coming." Angel said releasing a pent up sigh.

"How could you have seen this coming?" She asked confused.

"I remember how you two were. How you danced and touched. It was like watching a bizarre mating ritual. Yet you kept coming back to me and I just turned a blind eye. I didn't want to see how much she wanted you or how much you really wanted her. I saw her struggle with it. I saw as it drove her beyond the breaking point but I just couldn't address it. I ignored it and hoped that it was all in my imagination." He said thinking back on all the little touches and caresses he had witnessed between Buffy and Faith.

"Yeah well I still don't know what if anything will happen between us. I guess it's my turn to wait and see. Plus I still have feelings for Spike that I haven't fully worked out. Overall I have to say my emotional life is still rather complicated." She turned and smiled at him. "Now you have to go and set up a second front just in case." She said her smile wilting a bit around the edges.

Angel nodded, handed her the amulet, hugged her goodbye and walked away. She was sad to see him go. It was another chapter in her life closing and this time she knew it was closed for good. Whatever she had with Angel, residual feelings aside, was over. It was never meant to be and it would never be. She had gotten passed him but she knew she would always hold a small place for him in her heart.

Turning in the other direction from Angel, Buffy made her way back home. She had a lot of things to explain to the gang and they had a lot of research to do before they fought the First.


	13. Chapter 13

Echo opened her eyes and stared blankly at all the girls in the room with her. She didn't recognize any of them but she knew that Faith knew them. Shifting slowly up she felt how abused their body was. The cuts had healed and most of the bruising was gone but a deep seated pain still resonated through their body. Searching through Faith's memories Echo understood why her other half was hiding. It was clear Faith was hiding since she was in charge of the body. Faith was alpha and she was omega. She was the calm half, dominate but without the need for control. She never minded when Faith was in control of their body because she understood that she was Faith, she was everyone.

Looking at all the girls she heard a couple of them squeal in surprise as they saw her rise. In a rush they crowded her and several even hugged her. Staring at them all she shifted through Faith's memories plucking out names and faces. Reaching for a glass of water next to the bed she took a sip before talking. Her throat was dry and she wondered how long they had been unconscious.

"How long was I out for?" She finally croaked out.

"Three days." A brunette she knew was named Kennedy said while taking a seat next to her. "We've been so worried about you especially with everything that Buffy found out."

"Yeah we've missed you a lot too Faith." Another girl with reddish hair said. Echo stared at her thinking of her name; Violet.

"I'm not Faith." She said before standing up. Their body protested but she ignored it. Three days of lying down would obviously cause stiffness and she had to work it out sooner rather than later.

"What do you mean you're not Faith?" Kennedy asked confused.

"I'm Echo." She said looking down at their naked body. Walking over to their bag she picked up a set of clothes and got dressed ignoring the girls. Walking downstairs Echo examined the house. She had Faith's memories but it was better to see everything herself than to rely solely on memories. The house felt as if it was alive with so many people moving and eating and working. She wondered how many their actually were and with that thought the number popped into her head.

She knew she had to take Faith's place and fight this war. It wasn't what she wanted and she knew it wasn't what Faith wanted. Yet that night three days ago had changed everything for Faith. She was fragile at the moment and she needed to heal. It wasn't healthy but in a way it was. Someone else would fight the war with the body more than capable of helping to win it.

Like a wild fire the knowledge that Faith was awake ran rampant through the house. Soon everyone was gathered downstairs staring at her as if she was a miracle from god.

"Faith I'm glad you're awake and just in time." Echo turned to look at a blonde woman who Faith called Buffy.

"I'm not Faith, I'm Echo."Echo states turning away from the blonde and staring out the window. Knocking on the door of her mind she begs Faith to come out, to talk to her. Blocking out the world Echo sees the mental door crack open.

"They need you, you know that right."She tells Faith through the crack.

"I know and I wish I could help them but I can't. I can't face them right now. I can't face everything that happened. If I look at my body, if I feel it, then it makes it all real. I'm not ready for the reality of it all to come crashing down on me." Faith said unwilling to open the door all the way.

"What do you want me to do? How do you plan on surviving this when I don't know all the facts?" Echo asked lost on how to make everything better.

"If we win and I put a big if on that then I expect the whole town to implode. I need you to fight and follow along with Buffy's plans. When it comes to getting out of this town you're partially in charge of that. Go to my apartment and pick up the money I took from the banks. It's in the bedroom closet. Then get the money onto one of the school buses. You'll need the bus to get the rest of the people out of town. Make sure everyone packs their clothes and anything that might hold sentiments or emotions. Buffy will be more focused on the job than on what she needs. I'll trust you to pack her a bag, include a couple of photos of her mom and her stuffed pig. I know she'll miss it if this place goes kablooie. Beyond that I don't know what to tell you. Tap into whatever memories you need, into any of the people you need. I know you'll do fine. You got us through the Dollhouse I know you can get us through this." Faith said and started to shut the door.

Echo stopped her. "You will come back though right? You belong here. I'm just the light at the end of the porch remember?" Echo asked a tinge of desperation coating her voice.

"I'll come back when I'm ready." Faith said closing the door.

Opening her eyes Echo noticed everyone was staring at her as if she had lost her mind. "Faith wants me to set a couple of things up. We need a school bus to transport everyone." She said and then looked at the girls. "Faith says to pack your things. When I come back you can get them onto the bus and then we'll go fight this war." Turning back Echo made her way to the front door.

"Hold up wait a minute." Xander said clearly confused. Turning back around Echo stared at the young man, tilting her head to the side as she found his name.

"What is it Xander?"

"You said you're not Faith, and then you keep saying 'Faith said' do you mind explaining what the hell is going on?" He asked voicing everyone else's thoughts.

"Faith and I are one but not. She is all of us and we are part of her. I'm the part of her that was left after they took her away." Echo said hoping it explained everything.

"Yeah that doesn't really mean much to us." Kennedy chipped in.

"The Dollhouse fulfilled needs but to do so they needed the body and not the person that came with it. They took Faith out, left just the hollow shell of her body and me. Right now Faith won't come out. She's not ready and so I have to help you." Echo said unable to fully explain everything.

"What do you mean she's not ready?" Dawn asked not fully understanding the strange conversation.

"I know what she went through but I didn't experience it. We may be a part of her but we don't feel what she feels. We can see, we can watch, and we can understand but the sensation and the emotions involved belong to her alone. She can feel everything we experience and she can involve herself but we can't do the same. Right now after everything Caleb did to her she has shut down for lack of a better way of explaining it. She says when she is ready she'll come back." Echo explained turning away from the group and out the door. She had her orders and she intended to follow them.

Everyone stared at the door Faith/Echo had just exited through and wondered what the hell had just happened. "What the hell just happened?" Xander asked voicing everyone's thoughts.

"I have no clue." Buffy said unable to take her eyes away from the door. "I'm not sure any of that even made sense."

"I know right?" Willow said turning to look at Kennedy and the other potentials. "I mean I know she said that the Dollhouse as she called it took Faith out of her body I just wasn't sure I believed it. I mean that was really kinda creepy."

"She looks like Faith but she doesn't talk like Faith or act like Faith. Hell she doesn't even have Faith's accent." Dawn said finally taking her eyes off the door and looking at her sister.

"Well we have no choice except to accept her help. She's Faith in a sense. She'll at least have an idea of what's going on and she can still help us." Buffy said looking at the girls. "Now that Faith is back with us, or Echo, we need to finalize our plans. Robin and Xander already cut off the escape routes for the uber vamps. Everything is already in order. Once Echo gets back we'll go to the school."

Echo returned two hours later with the bus and all the cash. She had stored the money under the seats where hopefully no one would notice it. She had no idea really one how to properly explain that much money to a bunch of strangers. Parking the bus in front of the house she walked into the house and was mildly surprised at the level of chaos going on as everyone gathered their things and weapons.

"Faith you've returned good we are all ready to go." The British man she knew was Giles said upon seeing her.

"Yes I have, the bus is open everyone just needs to load up their things and we can go." She said ignoring the fact that the man had called her Faith.

"Willow needs to speak to you by the way." Giles told her before moving on to direct the girls.

Walking around the house Echo spotted the red head and walked up to her a bit curious as to what she needed. "You asked for me?"

"Ah yes uh Echo." The red head said with hesitancy. "I have to do a spell to activate all the potentials and make them into slayers. Kennedy is going to stay and help ground me but I need you to stay so I can use you as a conduit into the slayer line."

"What does that mean exactly?" Echo questioned not liking the idea overly much.

"Well you're the last slayer, or Faith is. The slayer line runs through her. I need to tap into the line to activate all the potentials. So I'm going to have you be in my circle and holding the Scythe with me. It's a little dangerous but it was the only thing we could think to do." Willow explained.

"So you were going to do this spell on Faith even if she was still unconscious?" Echo questioned having even more reservations in regards to these strangers.

"Well yes…there really wasn't any other way." Willow said hoping the stranger in Faith's body would understand.

"Alright call me when you are ready." Echo said walking outside to get away from the chaos. She felt a little bit lost and the silence coming from Faith was more than a little disconcerting. They had been together for so long it was more like they were one being instead of two individuals sharing a body. Overall it was a rather symbiotic relationship. She helped guide Faith, helped her control her own inner darkness and demons. It was a lot to ask of a person to kill without remorse or mercy. Echo had on occasion taken over that role. A moral compass was not something she had exactly fully developed and Faith's was never pointing quiet north.

And now with so much being asked of her she wasn't sure what to do. She wanted Faith to deal, to come out of her own darkness and back to the light. On more than one occasion she had helped Faith out but on this one she was at a loss. She had no real personal experience with what Faith had gone through. The only one in their mind who had was merely a child when it had happened. That person was unable to be of any real assistance in helping Faith cope.

Closing her eyes Echo slid into the depths of their mind and knocked on the door Faith had created to keep her out. "It's almost time you know. You've been in there a long time already. This war you've thrown me into isn't going to win itself. You have to help them. You have to help us." Echo said to the closed door. All she got in return was silence.

Opening her eyes Echo stared up at the sky and prayed for a little bit of luck. She knew she would need it to get through the next couple of hours of her life. If she got through the next couple hours of her life.

"Faith…I mean Echo we are ready for you." Echo turned around and walked back into the house. It was time.

Everyone stared at the large crater that was once Sunnydale. Almost everyone had made it and that was a considerable feat. The few who had fallen had died bravely. Among the fallen were Andrew, Amanda, Chloe, and Nora. She knows they were probably important to Faith. The idea that even without being there Faith would suffer through the pain of their loss hurts her. Turning away from the group of strangers she knows belong to Faith, Echo boards the bus again. Walking over to Anya she takes out the medical bag Faith had packed for the occasion.

"Do you know what you're doing?" Anya asks skeptical of the stranger inhabiting Faith's body.

"We do." Echo says taking out a roll of gauze and cutting off a small strip. Soaking the bit of gauze in alcohol she proceeds to clean Anya's wounds much to the ex-demons protests and groans and squeals of pain. Overall the damage isn't terrible, nothing a couple dozen stitches wouldn't fix.

After wiping away all the blood Echo threads a needle and takes out a tube of topical anesthetic. "This will take away some of the sting but it's still probably going to hurt a bit. I recommend you close your eyes while I work." She said while applying the cream to the areas she needs to stitch up.

Ignoring the others as they began to pile back into the bus Faith finished up with Anya and moved on to the next girl. Most of the new slayers had only minor wounds a couple cuts that a few stitches would take care of. Some had more severe wounds like Robin Wood. A name she found to be rather funny. His wounds were beyond her capabilities and the supplies she had brought with them. If he survived the ride to the nearest hospital she would be surprised.

Looking over to the front of the bus she watched as Giles sat in the driver's seat and started the bus back up. She didn't care where they were going she just hoped they got there soon. Wood needed surgery and she wasn't sure if she had enough supplies to fix everyone up. Moving Violet out of her way Echo looked Rona over. The girl was in bad shape. She had more than one broken rib but it was the deep gash in her leg that worried Echo. She didn't think the girl had nicked any of the major veins or arties. However the wound was large enough and seeping enough blood even with a tourniquet that Echo knew it could turn serious.

"You seem to have a propensity of getting hurt rather seriously don't you?" She asked as she shifted through Faith's memories of the past. "Sadly as before with Faith, this is going to hurt." Echo said getting up and going to the back to grab her second kit. Faith had prepared herself for almost any outcome and a variety of injuries. The internal bleeding going on with Robin however would require more than the morphine and surgical tools Faith had brought along.

Taking out a needle and the small bottle of morphine Echo measured out 2mL. Tapping the needle making sure all the air bubbles were out she looked a Rona. "This should take away a certain amount of the pain." She said grabbing Rona's arm and injecting the needle. Taking out a pair of scissors Echo cuts away Rona's pants. Pouring out a bit of alcohol directly onto the wound Echo ignores Rona's screams and grabs a pair of sterile gloves. Laying out the instruments on the seat next to Rona, Echo slides on the gloves. Looking over at a pale Violet she begins to give instructions.

"I'm now as sterile as I am going to get. I need you to pour that alcohol over these instruments." She said and watched as the girl shakily did as she was told. "Good now I've already medicated her as you saw but she is still going to feel pain. I need you to hold that leg down while I patch her up" She said and watched as the girl shifted over her seat and next to Rona holding the leg down.

Looking over the wound Echo probed deep to see if it was only a couple of layers of muscle that had been cut into and not any blood vessels. There were bits of debris that needed to be removed before the leg could be sown back up. Thankfully she had enough dissolving thread to do the muscle along with clotting gauze. It was expensive and when she had raided the hospital she had taken every bit she could find. Now she was more than grateful that she had taken the time to stop and raid before the battle began.

Working carefully and trying not to move too much or erratically as the bus lumbered down the road Echo stitched up the sliced muscles. The knife or axe she presumed had torn through the Sartorius, the vastus intermedius and into the vastus lateralis. Thankfully she had enough clamps to hold everything together as she slowly stitched everything back together. Placing a layer of Haemostatic gauze over the muscle Echo closed up the wound and clamped the layers of skin together to begin stitching it closed.

Bending over Rona for so long Echo felt as if her back was on fire by the time she was finished. Looking up at Rona she could see the girl was on the verge of passing out. Echo thought it would be a mercy. Grabbing the morphine she took out another 2mL and injected it. She felt the girl deserved a little extra dose even though it was pushing it. Well medically it was pushing it to give two doses so close to each other. Then again she had no idea how quickly the body of a slayer metabolized and absorbed drugs.

Shaking her head Echo looked at the other girls. Several were staring at her with a mixture of awe and fear. She supposed the fear came from the fact that if they were injured she was going to stitch them up. She also figured watching major surgery on a moving bus would be rather frightening. Putting away her tools and kit Echo threw away her gloves and moved slowly and carefully through the bus checking on each girl. Only one other had a wound that needed to be stitched up. The rest she figured would be fine.

Finally sitting down at the back of the bus Echo relished the silence and the ability to relax. The world was saved and everyone would live to see another day. The only thing she was left to really worry about was whether or not Faith would ever come out again.

"Hey" Buffy said taking a seat next to her.

Looking at the blonde slayer Echo just nodded leaning her head back again and closing her eyes.

"Since we're all alive and all I was kinda wondering how this thing works with you and Faith?" Buffy asked breaking the silence.

Opening her eyes and staring again at the blonde Echo shook her head. "It's complicated; I don't think I can really explain everything since in this world the technology doesn't exist. Thankfully it doesn't exist and if it did we would be on a mission to destroy it." Echo paused thinking of all the people inside of her and all the lives that had been wasted due to the aforementioned technology. "It's hard to explain becoming an individual, to slowly develop. The Dollhouse took people out of their bodies. What was left was a blank slate, a person living in a childlike state. We were easy to control, malleable and happy to please. We did as we were told and lived our lives waiting for the next 'treatment'. I can't explain how I came to be though I know I was different. Unlike the others I really developed. I went beyond the natural occurrences of grouping. I became self aware and the thing I wanted most, the thing I needed most was for Faith to come back. I am her but I am myself. She's followed along with me on several things and my thoughts and emotions have influenced her. Yet we are different people. We can each control this body but I know she is the one who should be controlling it." Echo started feeling it was a vain effort to explain something no one here in this world could ever really understand. Something no one in her own world had ever really understood.

"Yeah I guess you were right. It is a bit complicated." Buffy said nodding her head. "Can you tell me more about the Dollhouse?" Buffy asked hoping to know more or understand a bit more about Faith and her past.

"What do you want to know really? It would take years to go through all the lives and people who exist inside of us. I'm guessing you are trying to understand Faith more than what she went through and why she is having a hard time dealing with what happened." Echo began and watched Buffy seeing a minute nod. "It's different and you may ask how it is different. When we were on an assignment we became whatever the client needed. When we took them to bed we loved them. We wanted them because the person in control of the body at the time wanted them. It was never rape, we were never in control but the person, and the implant wanted everything that happened. With Caleb it wasn't. He took Faith without her consent and he broke her. The only person she can relate to was a child who was prostituted by her mother's boyfriend. Yet it took that child years to cope, to deal, to understand it wasn't her fault. I think it's harder for Faith to deal with everything because she has always been in control of herself in one manner or another." Echo paused feeling she had said too much.

"But she was never in control of her body when the 'implants' were put in." Buffy said trying to see the difference.

"Again that was different. When the implants were being put in Faith wasn't there. She was on a hard drive stored away until her contract was up. I was there but again I don't feel the same loss of control in regards to the implants as she does. She never cared for the implants, which is understandable but I never minded them. They were a part of our life. We were meant to please, we were expected to please. We just wanted to do our best. When Faith returned she never had a treatment. She could slide through the different implants but she never lost control. She needs control. I don't know if it is just a part of her personality or because she is a slayer. That loss of control, that helplessness, is too much for her to deal with."

"It's strange talking to you about Faith when you are Faith but not. Is she ever coming back?" Buffy asked finally letting her fear of Faith abandoning her seep through her bones. She still had to cope with the loss of Spike she didn't want to deal with losing Faith at the same time.

"I think she will. She says she will."

"She talks to you?" Buffy asks becoming even more confused.

"This might sound strange but my mind is like a village, each person has a place and I can tap into all of them. Faith has locked herself away. I've knocked on the door and spoken to her and she says she will come out but that could take a while. Trust me I want her to come back more than you do. It's nice being in control again but this isn't my world. The things and people who mattered to me are gone. I'm even more lost here than she is." Echo said remembering Paul and the fact that she would never see him again.

"Who mattered to you?"

"Well we had friends, we had a family. They are all gone now since I'm here and the ones who survived are there." Echo said vaguely.

"Did you have anyone special?" Buffy probed wondering about Faith's relationships.

"They were all special while the Dollhouse was around. Most of my lovers were murdered by Alpha though. He wanted me. He was a bit mad at the time don't get me wrong." Seeing the look of confusion on Buffy's face Echo decided to elaborate. "Alpha was an active like me. He wanted me to be number one so one day he attacked Whiskey and disfigured her. They took him and planned on placing him in the attic. That's where broken dolls went." She said and saw even more confusion coloring the blonde's features. "The Attic is rather complicated as well but it was in essence a massive computer. The human brain is a giant computer capable of processing large amounts of information. All the 'broken' dolls and enemies of Rossum where put there. They were hooked up and their brains were being used as data processors. When you go to the Attic it's like a mind suck, every thought is just at the edge of your mind but you can never get to it." Echo paused to reorganize her thoughts and get back to the point.

"Alpha was supposed to be sent to the Attic but he fought and in the struggle every single personality he had ever been implanted with had composited in his mind. He went a little mad to say the least. He was a bit like me before he went a little crazy. It's all theories really but before he was ordered to the attic he had attacked another doll in order to make me number one. He cut up her face pretty badly. His doll self had 'fallen in love' with me, so after the composite he became rather obsessed with obtaining me. He managed it once but it didn't exactly work out like he wanted it to. The next time he went after all my lovers. He managed to kill all but two and that's rather impressive when you consider I had thirty regular lovers. Then he went after Paul. He actually managed to put Paul in a coma and in the end the Dollhouse had to give Paul Active architecture to bring him back." Echo stops as her throat constricts a little at her own personal loss.

"I'm guessing Paul was very important to you." Buffy said trying to fill in the silence that had suddenly fallen between them.

"He was and he became important to Faith. She didn't love him like I did. She cared for him and I know he holds a place in her heart but she was never fully able to commit to him. It was always as if a piece of her was missing. She never cheated on him, not that there were actually that many sane humans left to cheat with, but she never fully opened up to him. Most of her past she kept hidden from him. I think he realized in the end that we really were two different people even though we shared the same body. He died when we returned to the Dollhouse with Topher. Faith actually stepped aside that night and let me come out and mourn. It was the first time in years that I was fully in control of our body." Echo stopped her voice catching and tears streaming down her cheeks. The memory was still fresh and the loss still heavy on her heart.

"I'm sorry for your loss." Buffy said unsure of what else could be said. Everything she had learned only confused her more. Nothing really made that much sense. Faith had lived several lives and none of them really made sense since even the concept of being taken out of your own body was rather foreign to Buffy. It was clearly possible and the proof was sitting next to her but it was still difficult to process.

"How much longer till we reach the hospital?" Echo said wiping the last of her tears and clearing her throat.

"Uh I don't know I'll have to ask Giles." Buffy said as she got up and moved slowly to the front of the bus to speak to the ex-watcher.

As the blonde walked back to the back Echo frowned. The stain on the blonde's stomach was still bright red and she knew the blonde was still seeping blood. "Why didn't you say anything?" Echo asked as she took out her medical bag.

Looking down Buffy was almost surprised to see the stain. She knew she had been stabbed but she didn't feel it now. "I didn't think it was bad enough to need attention." She said taking a seat and allowing Echo to lift up her shirt and examine the wound.

Wiping away the blood and cleaning the area Echo was surprised. It was clear that the wound was already healing. Removing bits of debris and fibers from the wound itself Echo took a quick sniff to make sure it wasn't septic before stitching it up. She suspected that the wound would be healed in a day, two at the most. The wound wasn't deep and she wasn't sure how deep it was originally but the blonde was right and she could do fine without medical attention.

"So how long did Mr. Giles say it would take? Mr. Wood over there doesn't look like he is going to live much longer. Though even with medical attention I will be surprised if he survives." Echo said as she looked at the broken and bleeding man.

"Why didn't you do anything for him?" Buffy asked curious and confused.

"Because there isn't much if anything I can do for him. He received a slicing blow to the chest that from what I could see severed several layers of muscle and probably cracked several ribs. The tingeing of his side lead me to think there is some internal bleeding. Whatever hit him probably broke several bones and I suspect burst his spleen. I didn't bring blood and I don't have the tools, anesthetics, or skill to save him. I stopped by and gave him a bit of morphine before I sat down to each his pain and make it less difficult for him to breathe. Beyond that there isn't much I can do." Echo said without taking her eyes off the dying man. She didn't bother to mention that the man looked rather pale for his coloring or that his breathing was already shallow. Again she was surprised he had survived as long as he had.

"Oh well we should be in the next town over in about ten minutes. There isn't really much around Sunnydale and the closest town is thirty minutes away. I guess that is a good thing since the place is a big crater now." Buffy said looking at Echo before shifting her attention back to Robin.

"The sooner we get there the better." Echo said letting the conversation die. She didn't have much else to say and was rather surprised she had spoken so comfortably with a relative stranger.

Fifteen minutes later they pulled up in front of the hospital. The girls declined getting checked out since the few who had more serious injuries had been taken care of by Echo. The only person to stay in the end was Robin Wood. He was sent straight to surgery, Willow and Xander offered to stay at the hospital while the rest figured out where to spend the night.

Echo stepped out of the bus and looked around the town. It was clear that the hospital was the hub of the town. She suspected the hospital was the closest one in the region and that the surrounding towns relied on it. She spotted a nice Hilton Garden inn across the street from the hospital. Pointing it out to Mr. Giles she requested he drive over.

"Faith I don't think we are able to afford a motel let alone a hotel." He said looking at the slightly bruised woman in front of him with doubt.

"Faith took care of the money situation so don't worry about it." Echo said before ordering everyone back onto the bus. Amazingly everyone was quick to follow and no arguments were made. Pulling up in front of the Garden Inn Echo told the others to give her a minute while she checked for vacancies.

Receiving a few doubtful nods of agreement she walked into the hotel and up to the front desk. Taking a quick mental count of the survivors she asked the clerk if there were eleven rooms available. She figured the new slayers could share rooms while some of the originals would rather have their own rooms and beds. There were eleven double bed rooms available and six king sized bedrooms available. After talking to the woman for a bit Echo confirmed her suspicions regarding the town. The Hospital owned the hotel and the majority of the rooms were booked for friends and family members of the hospital patients. Accepting the four doubles and six of the king sized rooms, Echo handed the woman Faith's bank card but requested to pay cash at check out. The nightly rate made Echo cringe internally but she merely nodded as she picked up two keys for each room and thanked the woman. Thankfully the hotel had a simple restaurant and room service. She expected the end bill would be astronomical by the end of their stay and she was grateful Faith had thought to rob the banks.

Walking out to the bus Echo ordered the girls to grab their bags. Turning to Kennedy and Anya she asked them to grab Xander's and Willow's bag as well. Walking to the back of bus Echo grabbed the eight duffle bags full of money and placed them on the bell cart she had grabbed. Lining up the girls in front of the bus she grouped them into twos and handed them the appropriate keys.

"I suspected you would like to room with Willow so I got you a private room." She said as she handed Kennedy two key cards. "Mr. Giles will have his own room along with the rest of us." She said before giving a key to Anya, Dawn, and Buffy. Taking Xander's bag from Anya she placed it on the cart and pocketed his key. She would give it to him when she stopped by the hospital or when he came to the hotel.

"How are you able to afford all this Faith?" Giles asked looking at his key card with a bit of suspicion.

"Let's just say Faith thought ahead." Echo said not bothering to correct the watcher. "Go to your rooms settle in, shower, change and then we can all meet at the restaurant for dinner at let's say five? I'm betting everyone is starving and exhausted so we'll make it an early night." Receiving nods from the girls she watched them walk into the hotel. Ignoring the questioning gazes of the others she followed after the new slayers pushing her cart.

Entering her room Echo put all but one of the bags into the closet. Setting one bag full of money onto the bed along with her own bag she opened it up and took out a couple hundred dollars. She had to pay for dinner tonight and she would rather use this money instead of Faith's. Setting the money on the desk, she put the bag into the closet, and took out a set of clothes.

Overall she came out of the battle with very little damage. She felt sore and even a little bruised but she knew she was fine. Going into the bathroom she turned on the water and waited for it to warm up before stepping in. It felt delicious and she was grateful to be able to wash away the dirt and grim off. Taking her time she enjoyed every minute of her shower before stepping out, drying off, and applying lotion. Turning on the television to the news she searched for any reports on the collapse of Sunnydale. She was surprised that it wasn't all over the news already. She suspected that since it was such a back in the woods place out in the middle of nowhere that it would be a while before anyone looked. That was a good thing since it would take longer for people in this town to connect them with that particular disaster.


	14. Chapter 14

Walking downstairs Echo leaves the hotel and makes her way to the hospital. She had moved Xander's things into his room and now it's time to check on Robin Wood. Entering the hospital she spots Willow and Xander talking quietly as they make their way to the exit.

"Xander, Willow what happened?" She asks already knowing the answer.

"Robin died while in surgery." Willow tells her with a sad little frown. "They were unable to stop the bleeding. He's in the morgue."

"I had suspected as much. Well since we aren't family members we don't have any right to take his body. I'll speak to the town's coroner and request for him to be cremated." Echo said as she led the two out of the hospital and towards the hotel. "Xander here's your room key. I already put your bag in the room. I recommend you both go shower and change. You have an hour before we all meet downstairs for dinner." She said stopping the two and handing over the keys. Turning around Echo made her way back to the hospital to speak to the receptionist about getting in contact with the coroner.

An hour later and several lengthy conversations Echo had the cremation arrangements settled and was making her way back to the hotel. She would pick up the ashes tomorrow afternoon. The coroner hadn't felt it was necessary to do a report so Wood would be cremated without delay. The coroner had also agreed to release the ashes into her care after she had given a long speech about Wood having no family. It was against the rules but since she was paying for the cremation he was willing to write down that she was a cousin.

Entering the hotel Echo found the whole group gathered in the lounge waiting for her. She had rented one of the conference rooms earlier for them to have dinner in. She didn't wanted strangers hearing their conversation over what to do next. The room was going to cost her another hundred and fifty dollars and they would be charged room service prices for having dinner there. She considered it a necessary expense for the sake of privacy.

Leading the group to the conference room she was pleased to see water at least was already served. A waiter waited for them with menus laid out on the table. Motioning for everyone to sit and look over their menus Echo picked out what she wanted to eat and placed her order. She waited for everyone to do the same and for the waiter to leave. She requested he knock before he returned.

"Well as some of you may already have heard Robin did not survive." She received several nods from the group before continuing. "I've made arrangements for his body to be cremated and I shall be picking them up tomorrow afternoon. Now to the business at hand; what do we do next?" She asked feeling no need to linger over Robin.

"Faith I have to say you've been rather cavalier about all of this." Giles said starring at Echo as if he was looking at a stranger. "You brush over Robin's death as if it means nothing to you."

"I am not acting Mr. Giles." She states looking him in the eye. "And I will not tell you again that I am not Faith. She might be willing to mourn Mr. Wood, I however, am not. He was just another soldier in the war we just won. I am sorry that he has passed but every war has casualties. We have lost many today but we could have lost a lot more. The world has changed and we have changed it. Hundreds of girls varying in age have been called, have become slayers. We caused that change and now we are responsible for those girls."

"What do you mean you are not Faith? You keep saying that but how is it possible?" Giles asks shaking his head in confusion.

Releasing a frustrated sigh at the willing ignorance of people in general she looks the group over, seeing the various degrees of confusion. "Honestly it won't matter how often I explain it. None of you will ever be able to fully understand that I am not Faith. The whole process of implants is beyond your ken, it is something that needs to be experienced to be understood. To put it simply I am a person inside of Faith. She at the moment is unable to deal with the fact that Caleb brutalized her and raped her repeatedly. When she is done dealing she will return and I will go back to the background."

The whole room became quiet at her words and Echo knew she had struck a nerve with the group. "Is it that hard for you all to understand or to acknowledge?" She asked seeing several members of the group turn their heads. "She has gone through a lot in her life but that was more than she could take. Until she is able to return I am in charge. Either you can listen to me or you can leave. The door is right there and I won't stop you. Faith had plans implemented before and I am merely following her orders in that regard. She wants me to take care of you all and I will. If you don't want or need my help you are more than free to walk away." She said looking at the group expectantly, seeing no one move to get up she nods her head.

The knock on the door stops her from continuing. "Enter." She calls out and watches as the waiter returns and passes out drinks. He leaves four carafes filled with soda and two with coffee on the table. Nodding her head in thanks she waits for the waiter to leave before returning her attention to the group.

"So again the question becomes what do you all want to do? You all have options. You can go back to your normal lives. You can start a new life. Or as Faith wished you can help us gather the new slayers and start a new Council." She said looking at everyone waiting for some type of response.

"How do you plan on starting a new Council?" Giles asks.

"Well I was hoping we could access their funds before it becomes government property. We certainly have enough time to do it. I'll go out tomorrow and buy a couple of laptops for us to use to hack into their system and transfer the funds."

"Are you able to do that?" Xander asked looking at Echo with a frown.

"I have a hacker in here who is something of a cyber thief. I am more than capable of doing it." Echo said tapping a finger to her head. "The question of obtaining the funds isn't an issue. The issue is who is willing to join us?"

"Well I'm in." Kennedy said breaking the silence that had fallen. "I can't turn my back after everything that's happened."

"Me too." Said Rona then Violet. Soon the entire room minus the originals had agreed to follow Echo and Faith.

"Now it comes to you guys. I know from Faith's memories that you have all spent a good portion of your lives fighting. We understand if you want to retire, to enjoy normal simple lives. Faith has made arrangements for you to have just that if you want it. Each of you will be paid for your time spent fighting. It should be enough for you all to start over." Echo said making sure to look each of the originals as she spoke.

"Well you'll need Watchers so I'm in." Dawn said giving Echo a smile.

"Me too." Said Willow looking over at Kennedy her decision clearly tied in with the younger woman.

"I guess you will need a carpenter to fix all the things you guys break." Xander said with a goofy smile.

"I'm in." Anya said looking at Xander with a smile.

Everyone looked to Buffy and waited to see what she would say. She was quiet for a long time looking at Echo as if she was trying to puzzle something out in her mind. Nodding her head in ascent she looked over to Giles.

"Well I suppose I can start looking for some of the watcher's who survived. You will need them as well." He said as way of an answer.

"It's settled then. I'll obtain the Council's funds tomorrow before I pick up Mr. Wood and then we can go." Echo said nodding her head.

"Uh where are we going?" Kennedy asked looking at Echo like she was missing a screw.

"Cleveland, there is another hellmouth there along with one in Tokyo and Kabul in Afghanistan. I figured Cleveland is closer so it would be the better place to set up a new Council. I would normally arrange for us to fly there but that is currently not an option." Echo said thinking of the bags of money sitting in the closet upstairs.

"Why isn't it an option?" Violet asked curious.

"Well…" Echo stopped as the waiter returned with dinner. Patiently she waited for all the plates to be handed out and the waiter to leave before continuing. "Faith considered it prudent to relieve the banks of their cash before we left Sunnydale."

"Is that your way of saying she robbed all the banks of Sunnydale?" Xander asked his eye's bugging out a bit.

"Yes, she knew that the money wouldn't be missed. Don't worry she made sure all the bills are unmarked before she took them. She figured we would need the funds to help us take care of immediate expenses." Echo said taking a bit out of her chicken.

"How much did she take?" Kennedy asked with a bit of awe.

"Enough. She took what she figured she would need to arrange new lives for everyone. However that means we can't exactly fly to Cleveland. It will be difficult explaining eight duffle bags filled with cash to airport security. So I'll rent a couple of vans and we can drive to Cleveland."

"Shit." Kennedy said shaking her head.

"I admit it is a long drive but if we take turns we should be there in a day or two."

"I wasn't saying shit to the drive. I was saying shit at the fact that Faith probably stole about two million dollars from the banks." Kennedy elaborated.

Smiling Echo merely nodded her head. "I promise it won't be missed. The whole town is gone and the money will be compensated to the companies through their insurances." She told them before returning to her meal.

"Wow, that's the only thing going through my mind right now is wow. How the hell did you manage to do all that?" Xander asked with a bit of awe.

Taking another bite of her food Echo considered what to tell them. "I didn't, Faith did, and even then not really her but Taffy." She said before returning to her dinner.

The knock on the door dragged her attention away from the others. The waiter returned and asked if they wanted anything else. "Everyone please order your desert now if you want one. Then I would like the check please." She said to the waiter and immediately began eating again. She was hungry and she knew she still had a lot she wanted done before the night was over.

"That made absolutely no sense." Xander piped out the second the door closed behind the waiter.

"It did just not to you. I've said it before and I'll say it again; we are all one. Taffy was a thief of the highest order." Echo said by way of explanation.

Silence pervaded the room as everyone tried to process everything Echo had told them. The confused expressions spreading through the room made Echo choose to ignore them and finish up her meal. She had chosen to skip desert so the weird line of questioning would be over sooner rather than later.

The waiter returning with the desert cart was like a blessing from above. Echo signaled for the waiter to hand her the check first. Looking over the bill she gave a large tip before signing the bill to her room. Leaving the check on the table she took one more bite of her diner before making her excuses and leaving the group.

Looking at her watch Echo decided she had enough time to go to the store and pick up the laptops. There was no reason to delay anything. She was tired but her body was rather pumped up. It was an interesting mixture of exhaustion and hyper energy. Entering the school bus she made her way to the closest electronics store and spent the next hour and a half picking out three laptops. She was going to be committing a couple of cyber crimes and it would be best to hide her trail from anyone who might be looking.

Coughing up five grand for the laptops and other necessary software she left the store and returned to the hotel. Parking the bus she went straight up to her room to get to work. Unpacking the three laptops she got to work setting them up. The knock on the door was a bit of a surprise. Opening it up she was confused to see Giles, Willow, Xander, Anya, and Buffy outside her door. Opening the door wider she motioned them in.

Moving back to the laptops she finished setting them up and began to work on hacking into the British banking system. One laptop was to hide her trail, one was to break into the system, and the last was to create a new account for the funds to go into. Looking at the group who had strewn themselves around her room she paused for a second before going back to work. "What can I help you all with?" She asked keeping most of her attention on the computers in front of her.

"I don't approve of this Echo." Giles began his tone serious. "You and Faith have clearly gone too far. You robbed the banks and now you are breaking into the Council's accounts to steal their money. I can't help but question your judgment."

Pausing what she was doing Echo turned around in her chair and looked at the older man. "Interesting, I've come to question your judgment as well Mr. Giles. Faith has always questioned your judgment."

"How so?" Giles began confused by the topic change.

"Well the girl was sixteen when she came under your care. Even then you never had much time for her did you? You never took the time to see to her welfare but you were rather quick in condemning her for her actions. Yet those same actions you condemned her for were rather similar to the ones in your past. Interesting really, how quick you come to judge her actions now. You've faltered more than once Mr. Giles and I doubt I am the first one to tell you that you've led your little flock astray with your willing blindness. Willow over there was slowly sliding into black magicks and you turned away from the signs. Buffy was going through post traumatic stress disorder after being brought back and you just walked away." Echo paused and looked at the little group.

"You may question Faith's judgment all you like but everything she has done has been for your benefit. She has more than enough money without the money from the banks to live a very happy contented life. She doesn't need to help you. None of you offered to help her when she was in need. None of you showed her mercy when she needed it. She helps you because she wants to… do not forget that. I told you all downstairs the second you don't want to follow me all you have to do is say the word. I'll walk over to that closet, take out two hundred thousand and hand it over to you without a word. You can start over, recreate yourself, or just disappear. I won't condemn you and neither will Faith." Echo said before turning to her laptops and beginning her work.

"Faith stole that money for your sake not her own. She is having me hack into the banks of the Council for the sake of all those girls you have turned into slayers, not her own. She has fought at your side because you **needed** her. You few are not the only ones who have suffered and sacrificed. She has and in ways you will never fully comprehend. Do not take her willingness and abilities for granted." Echo said before ignoring the group and continuing her work.

Hearing the group leave Echo worked hard through the night. It took several hours to break into the British banks holding the Council's accounts. It took even longer to create an account under the names of the originals including herself. She gave Faith executive power in case the group decided to form a coupe. Unlike the others she thought of Faith first not last.

The sun slowly rising in the east finally saw her falling asleep. She had rented three vans online with Hertz and needed to pick them up by ten in the morning. It would allow her three hours to sleep before she had to get up and begin her day.

The second she closed her eyes Echo walked the passages of her mind. She could almost feel Faith's pain. It stalked the different rooms like a howling beast. It was clear Faith wasn't ready to come out. That she still hadn't managed to deal with the things that had been done to her. Walking into one of the rooms she wasn't surprised to see the entire thing being played out in front of her. Starring at the macabre of horror in front of her Echo attempted not to interfere. She knew it was just Faith's way of dealing with the situation. She needed to play it out and realize that there was nothing she could have done to stop what happened. Echo had seen it before, had watched from a distance as it happened. She knew without a doubt that it wasn't Faith's fault. Now all she could do was wait until Faith understood that. Wait for Faith to accept that incontrovertible truth and finally deal with her emotions.

The alarm screaming next to her woke Echo up, breaking the sequence of disturbing images. She was grateful for the interruption. She had no desire to see the performance repeated over and over. Getting up she worked out the kinks in her body before getting dressed. The hotel was already alive with people moving about and getting ready for the day. The maids were already going from room to room to clean. Making sure the 'do not disturb' sign was on the door Echo left the room. Going down to the restaurant she found the majority of the group waiting in the lounge.

"I'm sorry to have kept you all waiting. I should have told you last night just to sign the check to your rooms. I'll take care of everything when we check out." She said before leading the group into the restaurant for breakfast.

It was a buffet style breakfast and Echo took her time picking out her food and enjoying every bite. Her body was still hungry and she knew that it was from exhaustion and the need to keep providing energy. Sitting with Kennedy, Willow, and Buffy she started her breakfast and ignored most of the conversation around her.

Finishing up her meal Echo looked at her companions. Everyone was done and waiting obviously for her to say something. "Since you're all done who would like to volunteer to come with me to pick up the vans I rented? I need two volunteers."

"Willow and I can go with you." Kennedy piped up ignoring the look her girlfriend was giving her.

"Wonderful, make sure to bring your license so we can sign the paperwork." She said before getting up and making her way over first to Xander, then Giles to pick up their licenses.

"Don't you need mine as well?" Buffy asked confused as to why Echo hadn't asked her.

"I've heard from Faith that you're not the person to put behind the wheel unless you want a car accident." Echo replied giving Buffy a dimpled smile.

Walking out of the hotel with Kennedy and Willow following Echo entered the cab she had ordered last night. The two followed giving Echo a slightly perplexed look.

"I didn't want to the leave the bus at the car rental company. I asked Xander to drop it off for me." She said looking at the driver so the girls would know not to continue that particular line of conversation.

They just nodded and waited patiently for the cab to pull up in front of the Hertz. Paying the driver, Echo thanked them and shut the door. Kennedy and Willow had already gotten out and made their way into the building. Following the duo Echo smiled at the person behind the desk.

"Hi I'm, Faith Lehane, I rented three vans online to be picked up today at 10am. I have a couple of people I'm going to sign on as possible drivers as well." She said taking out Faith's license along with Xander's and Giles'.

"Alright let me bring up your request and we can get everything going." The small brunette behind the desk said moving to her computer.

Thirty minutes later, a variety of paper work signed and three vans inspected the trio were on their way back to the hotel. Echo detoured to pick up the ashes of Robin Wood and spread them. She founded a nice wooded glade, part of a park and figured it was as good as any place. She didn't know the principal but she knew he had been instrumental to the cause. Saying a few words of thanks she hoped he understood the lack of pomp and circumstance.

Returning to the hotel soon after the couple Echo ordered everyone to pack up and get down to the vans as soon as possible. She went straight to her room to do what she had asked of the others. Bringing up a cart she packs up her bag and placed it on the cart along with the money. Going back downstairs she packed up the van she would be driving with the money and locked it up.

Entering the hotel she found everyone waiting in the lobby. Collecting every one's key cards she returned them to the front desk and checked everyone out. The bill as she had expected was pretty steep but thankfully they had enough cash to cover it. Finishing checking out she ordered everyone to the vans.

It took a while to pack everything up and for everyone to finish squabbling over who went in which van. Finally they were on the road. Stopping at the closet gas station she gave out twenty dollars to each person and told them to pick out the snack and drinks they wanted since they wouldn't be making any stops for quite some time.

She had a hotel booked in Flagstaff Arizona and they had an eight hour drive to go before they got there. She estimated that it would take three to four days to arrive in Cleveland and it was not a drive she was looking forward to. She knew they could make it sooner but she had no desire to spend two solid days driving stuck in a van filled with semi strangers. She wanted a bed at the end of each night and by god she deserved it after everything she had been through. She suspected the others would agree.

Echo had assigned Giles to drive the second van with Xander and Willow to drive the third with Kennedy. That left herself with Buffy so she suspected that she would be doing all the driving.


	15. Chapter 15

After three and a half days of driving they finally arrived in Cleveland, Ohio. Echo had never been so grateful for anything in her entire existence. It had been a trial of patience not to kill everyone the further they got. By the second day everyone was tired of being cramped up in the van and tempers were running high. She desperately wished she had sent everyone ahead by plane with enough money to pay for a hotel. Instead she had chosen to listen to Faith and had suffered dearly for it.

Arriving at the hotel she had booked Echo mildly considered falling to the ground and thanking all the gods that existed and ever existed that the trip was finally over. However, she felt it would only make her look a little more insane to the group. So she opted to cross herself and give up a silent prayer that she never had to do that trip again.

Unloading everyone out of the three vans and all the baggage Echo led them into the hotel and checked in. She was tired and in no real mood to deal with anyone so she announced that they would leave for dinner at six and to meet in the lobby. Without another word she made her way with her barrage of baggage up to her room. She put away the bags of money into the closet, took off her clothes, set her alarm and took a nap.

A two hour nap later she got up, showered, and got dressed. She had an hour before she had to go down to dinner and she wanted to look up some of the surrounding property for sale. She had originally intended to look up property when they stopped each night but after twelve hours sometimes more of driving she was in no mood for it. So she took the opportunity now to catch up on her original plans. She set up one of the laptops, connected to the internet and got to work browsing through the mass collection of property.

It took her the whole hour to look at only a small portion of the property in Cleveland proper. That hour had led her to decide that she would need to expand her search to the surrounding area. The suburbs of Cleveland were crowded and even the largest houses would not be able to accommodate the amount of people that would soon be fluxing to Cleveland. They would need something with a lot of land. Taking out a notepad she wrote down her requirements. The main requirement was land size. She expected they would need at least 100 acres of land. The problem however was finding a piece of property with a large house and that much land. She suspected that the few billionaires around Ohio would not be willing to sell their property at the drop of a hat. They would clearly have enough money that even if she offered an outrageous price for the property they would only laugh at her. She considered purchasing a nursing home or independent living community but figured they would need months or more to relocate people. Overall her options the more she thought of it were becoming more limited.

Puzzling over her options Echo shut down her laptop and made her way out of her room and down to the lobby. The group was still assembling but she could tell with just one look that everyone had either rested or found a way to refresh themselves. She supposed that finally arriving at their final destination would take the tension out of everyone. Tucking herself into a chair Echo waited patiently while the last few of the herd made their way down to the lobby. It wasn't a long wait and Echo was thankful for it. The day had been long and even with the nap she was tired. She also knew that she had a lot more work to do before she could actually call it a night.

"So um Echo where are we going for dinner?" Colleen asked dragging Echo out of her thoughts.

Giving the young woman a blank look for several seconds Echo shook her head. She had been so busy thinking about what would come next in the grand scheme of things that she hadn't taken the time to consider what they would do in the mean time. Looking around the hotel she walked to the front desk. "Do you guys have an in house restaurant?" She asked thinking it was a possibility that they didn't.

"No sorry we don't. We only have a bar; it has bar food but no real meals. However, there is a TGI Friday next door. It's attached to the building so you can either go outside and take a left or go down that corridor and take the second door on the left." The middle aged woman behind the counter said explaining with gestures as she did. Nodding her thanks Echo made her way back to the group.

"I guess we are going to Friday's next door." She said before leading the troop down the hall and into the bustling restaurant. They had to wait nearly thirty minutes considering the size of their party and the fact that no one had thought to call ahead. Echo didn't particularly mind considering she was still puzzling over future living arrangements. She couldn't help but feel it was a little unfair that she was stuck thinking out the logistics. Releasing a sigh of frustration she focused on the problem at hand. They couldn't buy a retirement facility or a massive mansion or estate. There was a small possibility of buying a summer camp. That would provide them with enough land but she suspected it would involve a lot of renovation, tearing down buildings, and rebuilding. Overall even with the land it made the prospect rather unappealing.

"Echo come on." Buffy said with a gentle tap. Looking up at the familiar yet foreign face Echo nodded and followed the group to their table. She had arrived at her final conclusion in regards to their future living arrangements. She didn't particularly care for the idea but she found that in the long term it would be the best one. Sitting down Echo gave the menu a cursory glance before picking out something. Ordering water with no ice she waited while the others talked for the waitress to come back.

Once the group had ordered and conversation was fluxing between the girls Echo decided it was time to interrupt the multiple conversations. "Now that we have arrived in Cleveland several decisions will have to be made." She started off looking at the semi familiar faces around her. "We can't spend all our time in a hotel so we have to find new living arrangements. I've searched around but I haven't been able to find anything close enough to Cleveland to accommodate our needs. I fear we will have to buy land and build to our specifications. It will take a lot longer than I had hoped but I find it may be our best choice." She paused to judge the group but seeing no objections she plowed on. "I suspect it will take a year to build a facility that is capable of housing and educating the girls that will soon be coming to us. I propose we buy a large mansion for the time being. We can alter it as necessary to accommodate us and the few girls we will begin retrieving. I found one possibility on that front. The mansion is large but it's the size of the property I am most interested in. It has nearly 30 acres of land which will provide the privacy we will need. It is expensive to say the least but funding isn't something we currently have to worry about. Also there is enough land to build an addition or a separate smaller house." She paused again not sure what else to say. Overall she knew it was her decision to make. She had made it clear on more than one occasion that she was running this particular rodeo. However, at this moment she wanted a little input, instead all she got where several blank faces.

"Are there any objections or opinions on the matter at hand?" She finally asked sick of the silence pervading the group.

"At this moment no, I think once we look at the two pieces of property you have in mind we may form some opinions." Giles said giving Echo a slight smile of reassurance. He had to admit that aside from his own personal misgivings he was rather proud. The woman in front of him was a strong and confident leader. He was impressed by her level of forethought and organization.

Seeing the slight smile Echo recognized what the older man was thinking and sighed. Undoubtedly he still did not grasp the difference between herself and Faith. It was a strange concept and to a person who had never experienced the realities of the Dollhouse everything about her would seem foreign. Even to the members of the House she was an anomaly. Yet she made sense. In this world she was a foreigner even though part of her belonged here that part was currently in hiding. It was all rather unfair. She didn't belong here and the place she belonged to she could never return to.

Shifting her attention away from the older man Echo looked at the others. Reading one expression after the other she felt that they were all rather content with her as their current leader. That in it of itself was strange. She was a stranger and she had expected on more than one occasion to expect some resistance. Instead she had encountered only mild cases of disapproval with no outright objection. Nodding her head she thought over whatever else she had to say. "I'll contact the realtor tomorrow and make an appointment for us to see the house." She said before the food arrived and everyone's attention turned back to the mundane.

The conversation shifted back and forth between topics Echo had no interest in. It was a lot of work to feign fascination for the lives of people she didn't know. She didn't particularly care that Rona had a girlfriend back in Philadelphia. She didn't care that Molly clearly thought Rona was cute. She didn't care that Kennedy had something of a worship crush on Faith. She didn't care that Buffy was obviously hung up on Spike and still not sure how to cope with his death. She didn't care because she didn't know these people and she didn't want to. As much pain as Faith was going through she was going through her own. Her grief for Paul was still fresh; raw. Her grief for the friends she would never see again was a fetid wound that stung bitterly. She didn't want to open her heart to new people when she hadn't even had time to mourn her people; her family.

Working through her meal Echo ignored the conversation around and declined dessert. Pulling out eight hundred dollars she handed it to Kennedy and asked her to pay the bill. She figured it would be enough considering everyone only ordered one drink, one entree , and she factored in the possibility of dessert and coffee. Getting up she excused herself as politely as possible and made her way out the restaurant. Feeling a deep tug she walked away from the hotel, away from the looks, the unasked question, the unspoken thoughts. She walked away from the responsibility that had been unceremoniously thrown at her.

Stopping at the van she picked up a stake and a couple of knives and pocketed them. She might still not be used to this world with its vampires and demons but even in her world she never left a safe zone without being armed. Locking up the van she took a slow meandering walk along the quiet road leading towards the hotel. It was late. Dinner had taken longer than she had intended and the sky was dark, the street lights were flickering on and off, and the world had a hushed quality to it. She expected that the area would be busier on a weekend but a Tuesday night left the streets silent after eight o'clock.

She only had a vague idea of where she was. She knew her way back to the hotel so she wasn't worried about becoming lost. No the vagueness came from memories from another life and another world. Cleveland had once been a prospering city in her world too and she had visited it on one occasion before the end, before the world had ended. She had visited it again after the end, she had searched for survivors, for supplies, for a House through its streets. It was those memories that tried to interpose themselves on top of her current sight. The Cleveland she had seen after the fall was a mass of destruction and chaos. What could have been looted had been. What could burn had been burned. It had been an ugly experience with enough death and mayhem to have served several lifetimes.

Now she was wandering through a small corner of Cleveland and it was nothing like what she had experienced. She wasn't sure how she felt about it all. Her thoughts felt jumbled, her emotions felt torn and stretched. Walking further from the hotel she wondered what would come next. She wondered if she would be the one in charge of their body for the rest of their lives. It wasn't a pleasant thought but Faith had still refused to budge. Had still refused to walk back into their body and take control of their lives. She desperately wanted Faith to come back. Faith knew the girls, she knew the problems, she actually cared. Echo didn't and that was the problem.

Turning around Echo made her way back to the hotel. She hadn't encountered anything interesting and a part of her had wished for a little action, for a little distraction. A vampire would definitely helped to take a little of her edginess away. Vampires; she couldn't help but think they were wonderful creatures. A way to release her anger and frustration without the guilt. Any time they had been forced to kill a reavers or a taken doll she had felt a deep consuming guilt. She had killed a person. Destroyed a body. Even if the soul or person who the body belonged to was long gone it still left her with a deep seated guilt. Now vampires, vampires were much simpler creatures. They exploded into ash instead of leaving a body for you to look at. Instead of leaving a corpse with dead eyes staring into the abyss with a question lingering in the darkness; why me? She couldn't help but like vampires just a little bit.

That thought brought Spike to the fore front of her mind. Faith undoubtedly wouldn't be taking that death well either. The two had formed a rather unlikely bond and Echo knew without a doubt that her counterpart would miss the man. For Faith Spike had transcended from being a blood sucking vampire to a man with thoughts, feelings, and opinions. It was strange considering Faith had a strong view of vampires; soul or no soul the only good vampire was a dead vampire. So the idea that the two had become such good friends was indeed an oddity. Another person on a long list for Faith to deal with, for her to mourn. The level of mourning and grieving Faith had worried Echo, it made her think that Faith would indeed hideaway in the depths of their mind for the rest of her life. It was a horrifyingly possible future and Echo dreaded its possibility.


	16. Chapter 16

Faith opened her eyes to a white ceiling and a room she vaguely recognized. It was always strange shifting from her mind to the real world. She was accustomed to it but the weirdness of it all never went away. Starring at the ceiling she reviewed what had happened while she was gone. It was strange to think that, to think that she was gone, that she had left her own body when in reality she had never left. Instead she had locked herself up within her own mind and let someone else control her body. The human brain amazed her. It was a malleable computer able to reroute and rewrite itself. There were hundreds of cases even in this world where a person's brain was traumatized and was able to fix itself to a certain extent. Her brain had just gone to a new level, reached a new height after years of being wiped clean and rewritten. As person after person was written into the coils of her brain. All while her mind, her personality, sat quietly on a disc unaware of what was being done. It still blew her mind and part of her still wished it wasn't true but she could hardly ignore it when she woke up every morning with 46 people wandering through her mind and Echo occasionally giving commentary.

She especially wondered about Echo, now more than ever. The fall of Rossum had left her with a lot of work to do and survival was more important than studying herself. She was in control of her body and dwelling on the past was something she didn't have time for. Contemplating the existence of Echo was an impossibility. She had attributed Echo to her DNA as Rossum had said. Echo was a byproduct of her body's ability to accept each implant without being wiped. Her body created antibodies to the implant, a way to combat them, to stop them from destroying her.

Now she questioned that. Could it have really been her genetic makeup when Alpha didn't show up on Rossums radars? Alpha's blood, his DNA, was in the system yet he never set off any alarms. He was able to shift from on personality to another just like her. He still had a core personality like she had Echo. His real personality didn't occupy his body but he was still able to exist. He didn't become a Reaver, he didn't become a mindless empty shell, he was a high functioning semi psychotic person. So if they were both capable of sliding through personalities why wasn't Alpha considered a cure for implants as she had been. She didn't understand it. There was still so much that she didn't understand.

Shaking away her confused thoughts Faith slid out of bed and made her way to the bathroom. Turning on the light she shut her eyes unwilling for a moment to see the reality. A part of her still feared what she might see even though Echo had sworn everything was gone. All evidence of what had happened had disappeared, had faded away. She knew it was true, her calm logical side said that it had been eight days, more than enough time for her slayer healing to have taken care of the damage. That logical side was unable to stop the illogical fear. Unable to stop her from wanting to close her eyes to continue to pretending it hadn't happened. It didn't matter how often she had replayed what happened in her mind. It didn't matter how often she had gone through her every move searching for where she had gone. It didn't matter how often she had worked out a way to have avoided the whole thing. She couldn't rewrite history, she couldn't erase what had happened, but seeing it, seeing her body covered with the evidence would be more than she could take. She had worked hard to face what had happened but she wasn't over it, she hadn't moved on, and she knew she never fully would. It was a part of her, ingrained in her brain, on her body, on her soul. The marks, the bruises, the scars, might fade, disappear but they would never disappear from her mind. The images would never fade. The reality was simple and unavoidable; she had been raped.

She knew the statistics. She knew that every two minutes someone in the United States was being sexually assaulted. She knew that there were an average of 207,754 victims of sexual assault every year. She knew that 54 percent of rapes weren't reported and that 97 percent of rapists didn't go to jail. Those statistics, those simple facts, those numbers of logic, did not deter from the fact that she was now a victim. She had never thought of herself as a victim. It blew her mind that she had escaped the darkness of her childhood without once being sexually assaulted, molested, or abused but failed to do so in adulthood. She was a slayer, powerful, strong, capable, and she was now a victim. It was that helpless reality that hurt the most. The act, the crime, had been painful, humiliating, detrimental but it was nothing compared to the feeling that she was helpless to stop him. She was helpless and weak, two things she had never been before, never in her entire life. She had always been a fighter. Yet he broke her down, he forced himself on her, and in her and she was weak and powerless and unable to stop it. Unable to do more than stifle her screams as he went on and on and again and again.

Faith shuddered hard trying to keep herself from breaking down again. Breathing deep she controlled her urge to flee back into the recess of her mind and avoid what had happened. Avoid the reality that she was a victim of a sex crime. She was part of the statistics. She knew he was dead. Knew that the bastard would never be able to touch her or hurt her again. She knew a lot of things but none of her vast array of knowledge stop the stomach clenching fear that overwhelmed her when she thought of him.

Opening her eyes Faith examined her body. Stripping off her shirt and shorts she looked at every limb. She stared at her breasts searching intently for any sign, any trace. Her body was blank, a nearly empty canvas of flesh. Her scars were few and far between. If he had left any scars she didn't see them. She knew the scars he left would be spiritual ones. Releasing a sigh Faith picked up her clothes from the floor folded them and placed them on the bathroom counter. Turning on the shower she waited for the water to warm up before stepping in. Feeling a sudden sensation of being unclean she turned up the water until the heat was nearly unbearable. She felt it scorch her skin and relished in the pain, in the burning away of his touch. Grabbing a wash cloth and soap, she lathered up the cloth and began scoring her body. After removing a layer or two of skin she felt a little cleaner, a little less tainted.

Stepping out of the shower Faith tenderly dried herself off and generously coated her skin with lotion. Looking at herself in the mirror she shook her head. She knew what she just did was a little foolish, illogical even, but it still made her feel a little better. She would never be clean of the stains he had left on her but she would eventually learn not to feel those stains. She would get over what happened. She would heal. She would be whole again. She just needed to take it one day at a time, one step at a time.

Walking back into the room Faith grabbed a pair of jeans, a bra, underwear, and a t-shirt. Changing quickly she looked at the clock. It was only eight in the morning. Turning to the two laptops she signed in and checked her email. Echo had emailed a couple of realtors in the area last night and she was curious if any had responded yet. Seeing the mailbox was empty she turned her attention to going through the classified and realty websites looking for a good chunk of land. Echo had already explained her thoughts in regards to a central headquarters where the girls could receive an education and training. Faith agreed whole heartedly. She also agreed that buying land and building to specifications was easier than buying a building and remodeling the whole place to fit their needs.

After half an hour of looking she found a piece of land in Cuyahoga county; 100.43 acres of land with the ability to be sectioned off into developmental lots or commercial. It was perfect. Jotting down the name of the realtor and the number she moved on to her next problem. She liked Echo's idea of a house but she found it a little optimistic. The idea of placing a bunch of people in one house with limited about of privacy seemed like a recipe for disaster. They would either need a huge mansion like the Biltmore estate or a building. Since it was unlikely an estate was going up for sale or auction any time soon she choose to look for a apartment building. They were rare she knew but a lot less than a estate.

That search took longer considering she had to search through most of Cleveland's classified. There were several apartments and condos for sale which cluttered up the sites. Finally after an hour and a half of reading through ad after ad she found two buildings for sale. The first had 24 apartments; 18 one bedrooms, 4 two bedrooms and 2 three bedrooms. The second building had 38 apartments; 6 studio, 26 one bedroom, and 6 two bedroom. Jotting down the names of the two realtors and their numbers Faith shutdown her laptops and picked up the phone. Three conversations later she had appointments to meet the realtors.

Stepping out of the room Faith made her way downstairs. She was starving. She hadn't intended on surfing the internet for so long. She'd expected a quick search instead she had spent two hours. Shaking her head she hoped the girls had gone ahead and eaten. She was surprised that no one had knocked on her door. Echo hadn't left them with any extra money and she knew that the hotel didn't have a restaurant. She wondered if they girls had been able to eat or if they were patiently or not so patiently waiting for her. Stepping off the elevator she wasn't too surprised to see everyone gathered in the lobby. She really needed to give everyone a small amount of cash to hold them over in case she got occupied.

"Sorry for the wait guys I just got caught up doing some work. Have you guys been waiting here long? I don't remember Echo telling you all to meet down here at any specific time." She said reviewing with Echo the last conversations before they had gone to bed.

Buffy perked up at Faith's words, she knew it was Faith. She didn't know how she had come to notice the difference but there was a difference. Echo felt different, she acted different, she wasn't Faith. Smiling Buffy wished she could run to Faith and wrap her up in a big hug. She had missed Faith. It had been strange starring at Faith's body and knowing that even though Faith was there she wasn't. Echo was in charge of the body and thinking of it like that; "the body" was even stranger.

"Did you say Echo?" Kennedy asked breaking out in a huge smile. "Does that mean you're back? Faith are you back?" Kennedy asked moving slowly closer. Seeing Faith give a nod she lunged at Faith grabbing her she gave the older slayer and tight hug. "We are so glad you're back." Kennedy sounded as if Faith had been gone for years instead of a week and a day.

In seconds the rest of the Potentials, now new slayers, were surrounding Faith. Each one touching her, reaffirming that she did in fact exist. Faith found it to be rather funny if just a bit disconcerting. The whole group acted as if she had miraculously risen from the dead. She knew it must have been odd for them to meet Echo but she hadn't expected this type of reaction to her return.

"I missed you guys too." She said giving everyone the right amount of reassurance. She was again amazed that these girls placed her in a mother like role. It wasn't something she was accustomed to, not really. She was a leader and beyond one person in her head, she wasn't a mother. Yet she had mothered them and now she was stuck with the role. She would much rather of preferred the role of careless aunt. It's what her pre-rehabilitation would have like. It was a role filled with a lot less responsibility and one she would have appreciated after years of nothing but responsibility."Come on there is a Denny's a couple of miles down the way. I bet you guys are hungry." Faith finally said pulling away from the group of young women and making her way towards the door.

Stepping outside she made her way to her van knowing without thinking about it that the others would get into their respective vans and follow her like little ducklings. The image struck her suddenly and she couldn't help the slight laugh that escaped her lips. That small slip caught Buffy's attention and Faith looked at her as they both got into the van. It was the first time in what felt like an age that Faith had looked at Buffy. Giving Buffy a slight smile Faith turned her attention to starting the van and looking behind her to see that all her ducklings had gotten into the van. The thought again made her smile.

Buffy saw that smile, she wanted to ask what had Faith smiling so but she wasn't sure how to. She wasn't sure how to treat Faith knowing what she knew. After Echo's blunt announcement that Faith had been raped and brutalized by Caleb no one else had touch on the topic. No one referenced it or asked how to treat Faith if she came back. When she came back. No one had thought to and now Buffy wished she had, asked that is. She had been attacked by Spike but she had stopped him. She had fought back and she had won and he had left. Faith had lost. Buffy didn't know how to respond to that. She didn't know what to say. She had no way to relate to Faith on this. In reality beyond being slayers she knew she had nothing in common with Faith. They were on two different levels. They had lived two very different lives and what they had in common was so minuscule, so infinitesimal that it didn't even register. This new Faith was a stranger, more so than the old Faith was.

Faith turned back put the van in gear and pulled out. She waited for the two other vans to do the same. "Did you enjoy meeting Echo?" She asked randomly feeling a desperate need to break the silence between her and Buffy. The occasional looks, the wonder, the blatant desire to say something coming from Buffy finally drove her to it.

"She was different. It was strange. She's like you but not. Watching her is like watching what could have been you're twin, similar traits but completely different personality. I'm glad you're back." Buffy finished turning away embarrassed she stared out of her window. She felt lost on how to continue the conversation. She was embarrassed for her comment about missing Faith. She was also confused on how to move the conversation onto a different topic. She couldn't ask 'how was the little vacation you took in your head?' or 'How are you doing?' or 'Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?' All those questions would lead to having to talk about IT and she didn't know what to say in regards to IT. She didn't know if Faith was ready to talk about IT. She was already sick of saying IT in her own mind.

Sitting in the first row of the back seat Dawn watched the two slayers interact with mild interest. She knew what Buffy wanted to say, what Buffy wanted to ask. She knew because she wanted to ask as well. She wanted to know how Faith was doing. She wanted to know how she was coping, if she was coping. Since that night she had wanted to help. She had searched the sites and looked at the facts and was disgusted by the statistics. She had never known until that moment how prevalent rape actually was. She had never seen that she was being raised in a culture that accepted rape as a matter of fact. She had never noticed that the American cultured expected women to be raped, that it was an inevitability. The facts didn't lie and the more she read the more she was disgusted. She had never noticed before how much rape was perpetuated in the media, books, movies, and TV. If a woman was assaulted those nice words were always used; sexually assaulted. Women were told to be careful, to walk in crowds, to not walk alone, to never go out at night all in the fear of being raped. American society was hell bent on restricting women with the threat of rape instead of condemning rapists. It was all rather disgusting.

Statistically speaking one out of six women between the ages of 16 and 25 will be raped. Faith was now part of the statistics. If they were really close friends then you could almost say Faith had saved the rest of them. She had looked closely at the other girls that night. She had wondered how many had been sexually assaulted, how many had been molested, and how many had been abused. It was an accepted reality of society and a shocking awakening for her. She had grown up in a relatively normal house. Her mother had never abused her. Her father had never assaulted her. Buffy had never touched her sexually. None of her friends had shown any inclination to do such a thing. Yet the statistics clearly stated that out there even as she was thinking one girl was being assaulted. It was rather mind blowing.

"Deep thoughts back there Dawnie?" Faith asked breaking the silence and Dawn's thoughts.

"The deepest." She said unsure of how to proceed.

"Care to share with the group?" Faith asked clearly interested. The group only consisted of Faith, Buffy, and Dawn. The three vans were rather unnecessary without all the luggage and bags of money.

"I was marveling over the prevalence of rape in our society and wondering how you are doing?" Dawn said deciding it was better to go with blunt and blatant when it came to Faith. Faith respected people who told it how it was instead of constantly beating around the bush.

"Dealing with what Dawn?" Faith asked getting quiet. Her mind wandered to Echo wondering how much the gang knew.

"Dealing with the fact that Caleb raped you. We know, and I know you wish we didn't know but we know. Even if the evidence hadn't told us as much Echo would have. She was rather blunt. No one else has said anything and it's been rather hushed up but I wanted to see if you are okay. If you need anything, if you want to talk, I just want you to know I am here to listen." She said hoping she had gotten her true message across. That Faith was able to see how concerned she really was.

"In truth Dawn I am not okay. I am not even close to being okay. I woke up this morning and for one horrifying moment I thought oh god no it really did happen. I prayed it had all been a dream. Even as I went through it, dissected it, tried to figure out a way I could have avoided it I realized it was out of my control. I am a victim and that terrifies me. The fact that he is dead helps but it doesn't take away what happened, it doesn't erase it from my mind, it doesn't make me feel clean. I've had over thirty lovers and not one of them was my choice but I have never felt dirty. I have never felt like this before." Faith said her breathing picking up a notch. She hadn't intended to talk about it. She had hoped vainly that no one knew. She had prayed that it would never be brought up and that she  
would never have to speak of it aloud. She had done what so many women before had done; she had tried to pretend it hadn't happened.

"I had never thought it would happen to me. I mean I'm a slayer there isn't much out there that is powerful enough to overcome me. I never thought anything out there would want to violate me, kill me yes, violate me? never. I expected to die fighting, not fight and strain and bleed and suffer as I was beaten and raped. I never thought there was anyone out there strong enough to hold me down, to break me, to keep me pinned as he..." She stopped she had parked in front of the Denny's and for a moment her mind shut down. She went back to that place. She returned to that torch lit cavern, to the pain, the ripping and tearing, to the muffled screams. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of hearing her scream. She wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of breaking her. She fought and even as she lost again and again she still fought until she didn't. Until she realized he was enjoying himself more the harder she fought. Then she stopped, went limp and let it happen. She closed her eyes and let it happen. She listened to the voices and tried to will herself away, to lose herself in her own mind far away from them.

"Faith, Faith are you okay? Faith?" Dawn said getting closer but refraining from touching Faith. She had read enough to know that victims of rape went through post traumatic stress. That some returned to the time and place. That some experienced physical flashbacks, that others experienced emotional ones. She didn't know which Faith was experiencing now but she knew better than to touch Faith.

"Dawnie is she okay?" Buffy asked almost as if Dawn was the definitive voice of sexual crime victims.

Starring at her sister blankly for a moment Dawn nodded. "Just don't touch her." She said wondering if she was the only one who even bothered to look up rape. It was clear she might have been. Knowing now what she knew about what had happened between Buffy and Spike, Dawn marveled that her sister wasn't more informed. Then again she supposed even a temporary victim was unwilling to delve into such a dark world. Buffy was like many victims of sexual assault. She was ashamed of it, she didn't want anyone to know about it, and worse she partially blamed herself. It was part of the culture. A woman blamed herself for getting raped. It was ridiculous and wrong. No woman asks to be raped in any shape or form. It is not the woman's fault it is the rapists.

The part that amazed Dawn the most was that most women are raped by a friend, family member, or acquaintance. She had always assumed that rape was a case of the dark stranger. Yet the reality was evident even in her own little world. Buffy had be nearly raped by Spike, an ex-lover and close friend. Faith was raped by Caleb, an acquaintance of sorts and an enemy. She had thought rape was a sexual crime but after looking at Faith, after reading the facts and the reports she realized that it was about violence, hate, and dominance. In Buffy's case it was Spike trying to dominate her. In Faith's she suspected it was about all three.

Waiting patiently for Faith to recover Dawn watched as the other two vans pulled up. She watched as the others spilled out into the parking lot and as a group began to make their way towards the entrance. Opening her door Dawn poked her head out and shouted that they would be in shortly. "Faith the others are here are you ready to go in?" Dawn asked just to break the silence and in the hopes that Faith had returned.

"Give me another moment Dawn, just another moment." Faith responded shaking her head.

"Take all the time you need." Dawn said sitting back into her seat.

Faith nodded her head and took a couple of deep breaths. She hadn't intended to go back there. She hadn't intended to return to that place so quickly. It had been easier to deal with in her mind. There she hadn't felt anything, at least not physically. Here she felt both. Releasing a final breath she looked at Buffy. She had avoided really looking at her counterparts face. She was afraid of what she would see. She wasn't surprised to see confusion but where she had expected to see disgust or pity she saw only concern. Turning to Dawn she smiled. She was surprised the girl had taken the initiative to bring up such a volatile topic. She was even more surprised the girl seemed so composed about the topic, knowledgeable even. "Thank you Dawn." She gave the girl another smile. "If you don't mind maybe we can continue this conversation some time after breakfast. I'm starving." Faith said a need to lighten the mood a little.

Dawn smiled and nodded. She knew Faith would talk when she was ready. If Faith chose to speak to her about it, so be it. If Faith chose someone else so be it. Dawn was happy as long as Faith spoke to someone. It might not help but she knew that it couldn't hurt. Opening her door she out and closed the door before making her way into the restaurant. She thought of waiting for the other two but figured it was time for them to talk a bit.

Looking at Faith, Buffy wondered what to say. She was shocked to say the least. She had known it had happened; it being that Faith had been raped but part of her wanted to pretend it hadn't happened. She wished it happened and she was ashamed to admit that she had blamed Faith. She had been angry at Faith for going out alone, for being on her own so often, and for making it so easy. She hated herself for thinking that. She hated herself for blaming Faith. Now hearing Faith, hearing the despair tinge her voice, she felt more shame if that was even possible. She didn't know what to do with Faith, for Faith. It was clear that Dawn had thought about it. It was clear that Dawn had considered the reality of Faith's situation. Dawn who had no experience with sexual assault. That thought drew Buffy up short. She assumed Dawn had no experience but she didn't know for sure. She had never asked her sister about it. It was a topic as taboo as it was evident. Starring out towards Dawn she couldn't help but wonder, couldn't help but think that she would have to have a very long conversation with her sister.

Turning back to Faith, Buffy still didn't know what to say. Too much time had passed on now she felt stuck in the gap created by the silence. It was like a wall or a gaping hole between them. It was only getting bigger and her mind shut down on what else she could say. She had nothing to add. She didn't know anything about what Faith was feeling. She was clueless on the topic as a whole.

"We better get going." Faith said opening her door and stepping out of the van. Swearing under her breadth Buffy followed suit. In silence the two slayers walked into Denny's and joined the others in the waiting area. It was clear the restaurant wasn't ready for a group of seventeen.

"What took you guys so long?" Molly asked with a little smile curious about the two slayers.

"Just catching up on current events." Faith said casually "Which reminds me I have an appointment with three realtors today. If everything goes right we will all be moving within the month. I don't know how many offers have been made on these properties so I don't want to make any promises that we will get either of the properties but it's a possibility." Faith said happy to have a topic to distract the girls. She wasn't ready for a share and care group. Sharing with Dawn and Buffy had been intense enough she didn't want to do it with all the girls.

"Wow that's great Faith. When will we be able to see the properties?" Violet asked with a little overabundance of cheer.

Faith stopped for a second as she watched the hostess appear. As a semi silent group they made their way over to their table and ordered their drinks. Faith waited for everyone to fully settle in and start perusing the menu before continuing.

"I'd like to see them first and if I decide to make a bid then we can make arrangements for everyone to take a look. I just don't want it to look suspicious. I mean I can play rich financial investor but it's hard to get that look across with a bunch of teenagers following me about. When we get back to the hotel I'm going to give you all some pin money. I figure we can have breakfast and dinner together but I would rather you guys take care of lunch on your own. Also since it is clear we will be here long term I think you all should go out and buy some necessities. I will include that in your pin money. Mr. Giles, Willow, or Xander can take you guys out. I'll be leaving the van behind. I have a limo ordered to pick me up at..." She paused and looked at her watch "Two o'clock." I won't be returning right away to the hotel with you all so I would like everyone to meet me in the lobby at one thirty to get your money." Faith finished as she looked over the menu and picked out her meal.

"Why aren't you coming back to the hotel with us?" Kennedy asked and then looking at the waitress as she approached with their drinks.

Again Faith wondered why all serious conversations ended up being had over a meal. It made it rather inconvenient. It wasn't that she cared what these strangers heard it was more that she didn't want them to hear anything that might be misconstrued. So she waited patiently as everyone got their drinks and then placed their orders. Thankfully she knew she would have at least twenty minutes to iron everything out before she was interrupted again with the food.

"I have to go shopping for some new clothes. I mean my clothes don't exactly scream business woman. These are clothes from around what four? five years ago? Not only are they out of date they also belong to a teenager not to an adult. I want to give off the right impression. One that goes along with the persona that Echo created for this world." Faith said taking a moment to add two sugars to her coffee and a bit of cream.

"What do you mean by your persona?" Giles asked clearly confused about what he was hearing.

"Well my record is clear as per order of the Council, however, as far as this world knows I haven't done a single thing over the last four years. Echo created, no, embellished my history a little. It helps to explain my money along with my affiliation with the SCSG." Faith said wondering how much they would question Echo's actions. She knew that Echo always had them in mind with everything she did.

"I'm not sure I understand what you are talking about Faith. How was she able to embellish on your history? What is the SCSG?" Giles asked becoming a little agitated at Faith's constant ambiguity.

"The Council wiped away my records, my history, my entire existence in essence and rewrote it. The identity they created is similar. I am still Faith Lehane. I was still born in Boston and my parents names are still the same. However, I was never arrested, I graduated high school, I went to college, and I inherited a reasonable fortune from my grandfather Richard Wilkins III. It is all false but it allowed for all my associations and for my disappearance. Echo added to my history. I've been traveling for the last four years investing my money as well as enjoying myself. It will allow for my personalities to be used without drawing suspicion. My new history includes college, travel to Japan, England, Saudi Arabia, France and Italy, oh and Russia. It's why I am fluent in each. Almost everything about the people inside me has been rationalized into this world, into my history. I have a credit score, a credit history, a portfolio of excellent investments, and a couple of properties along the Californian coast. The last is pure bullshit but it looks good.

"As for my affiliation with SCSG that is the Slayer's Council School for Girls. I had Echo create the name, set up the bank accounts, and arrange for funds to be available for its board of directors." She said pointing in the vague directions of Buffy, Xander, Willow, Anya, and Giles. It allows all of you access to the accounts and as soon as we have a little more time I would like you all to come to the bank with me. We have to have bank cards and checks made out for you all." She said not bothering to include the fact that she was the controlling body of the board.

"How were you able to do all of this exactly?" Giles asked his disapproving face making itself known.

Releasing a sigh Faith heard Echo reflect her sigh in their mind. It was clear Giles was against breaking a few laws. "Mr. Giles you're moral high ground regardless of how noble is a little inconvenient to the realities of your situation. The Council would never have given you the funds. They kept you on the border of poverty for the sake of dominating and controlling you. They have never financially assisted their slayers beyond the bare minimum. Now the Council is gone. Their funds sat happily in accounts that would soon be claimed by the banks. Echo took that money. She transferred it to an account with all our names on it. She arranged for us to be fiscally able to take in these girls and do more than the bare minimum."

"What would you have done without Echo's help? How would you pay for the hotel you are staying at now? How would you have gotten all of the girls here? How would you feed them? How would you clothe them? These are vital questions your morality is not able to take into consideration. The Council's money belonged to the Slayer line, to the women who lived and died for the world. Instead it was used to fund the relatively self indulgent lives of fat watchers. The Council lived in a luxury much akin to that of the Pope. It was disgusting and its destruction is not a tragedy but a reformation. It has opened the gates for a new world, a new generation, and a new life for slayers and potentials all over the world. We will not be an organization bent on controlling slayers, we will be a force for good." Faith finished as the waitress arrived with help to set down their food.

Silence pervaded the group as plates were set down and the waitress murmured if everything was alright. Several nods assured the girl and her help. She left with a glance back at the group and a slight shake of her head. She hoped they had the decency to leave a decent tip.

"It is not that my morality is inconvenient Faith. I just worry that you are doing all of this without thinking of the consequences. What happens if the police discover what you have done? What will happen not only to you but to the girls, to us?" Giles asked looking at Faith with a bit of righteous indignation.

"Mr. Giles unlike you I have spent the last ten years of my life surviving. Four of those years I was a toy for the pleasure of strangers. I became everything they wanted. I was also a tool for higher powers. I was made to do some very terrible things. I learned the system, all system inside out. I know how the C.I.A works, I know the F.B.I, I know the N.S.A and I know politicians. The world of power and government is one where I am very familiar. I would never do anything if I had not first thought of the consequences and the repercussions. Echo has thought out every single scenario in regards to the Council's accounts. More than that she had created a history, a record, and a will. The Council's funds was placed into control of three people. The treasurer, the head of the Council, and the Secretary. Echo has created a will for the corporation, as the Council legally was, that all funds be relocated to a subsidiary in control of us in the case of the demise of the Council proper. She has also created legal documents stating as much with the signatures of each of the three controlling parties. Every T has been crossed and every I has been doted." Faith said her voice calm and her face blank. She was angry but didn't want to let that emotion leak to the surface.

She had spent years surviving in a hostile world in part because of these people, because of the people he sanctimoniously referred to. They had no right to question her actions in such a tone. She was working for them, not for herself. She could be sitting on a beach in South Florida sipping mai tai's instead of sitting in a Denny's in Cleveland. Giles words stung and his lack of trust was a bitter pill to swallow. Having to justify her actions made her want to call it quits and walk away. She didn't owe any of these people anything.

"Giles, Faith is right." Willow said surprising Faith. "We would have needed the money and instead of her it would have been me trying to do the same thing. Faith undoubtedly broke a few laws in reallocating the funds but she probably did it in a more legal way then I would have been able to. I would have had to hack into the system and use magic to hide my trail. She has probably made it nearly impossible for us to get caught and if we did she could probably use enough legalese to get us out of it." Willow finished. She was tired of Giles questioning Faith when it was obvious Faith didn't have to be here. She didn't have to go to Sunnydale to help and she definitely didn't need to stay and continue helping them. This Faith was nothing like their old Faith. She was new and complicated but there was nothing malicious about her. It was clear she was trying to help and Willow was more than willing to trust her to do just that.

Nodding her head Faith silently thanked the witch. She hadn't expected the defense to come from that corner but she was grateful for it. Focusing on her food Faith began to eat. She was glad the conversation seemed to have come to an end with Willow's defense. She was tired of defending herself. For her first day back everything was already so intense she was afraid she was going to break. Her emotions were in a torrent storm and her mind was walking back and forth between things that had happened and things that she had to do. It was nice to have a simple quiet meal without having to keep up inane conversation.

Finishing up her omelet Faith looked over the table. There was light conversation going on but not much beyond that. No one else seemed willing to bring up a topic with her and for that she was grateful. Looking at Buffy and Dawn she noticed that they were still eating. She didn't want to wait for them or for the conversation that they would undoubtedly end up having in the van on the way back to the hotel. She wasn't ready to delve back into her nightmares so soon. "Buffy, Dawn" She started and waited to catch their attention, once she had it she continued. "If you don't mind I would like to head out to the store now. I figure you guys can stay here for a bit longer, finish up and return to the hotel with the others." Seeing them nod in assent Faith gave them both a slight smile. Standing up she pulled out three hundred dollars and left it with Dawn. She figured it would cover the meal and leave enough for a tip. "Make sure you tip the girl well." She said before getting up and making her way out.

Getting into the van Faith wondered where the hell she would go to buy some clothes. Her version of Cleveland was different but she suspected if she drove to the nearest gas station she could get some directions. Pulling out she felt a weight sliding off her shoulders as she put distance between herself and the group. She knew everything would work out, it would just take time.


	17. Chapter 17

Sitting in the lobby with a cup of tea Giles wondered when everything had changed so drastically. He supposed it was gradual. The children grew up and their relationships changed. He was still father figure to most of them but he knew even that picture was tainted by the reality of who he actually was. He understood that conceptually the image of parents changed as people got older and eventually as adults children learned whether or not they actually liked their parents; as people not as parents. He wondered now if his 'children' actually liked him. He had taken them all under his wing. He had advised them, nurtured them, and encouraged them but he had also failed them. He supposed all parents did at one time or another. He also suspected most parents didn't have to deal with such strange failures as his. He had failed to control Willow's magic. Instead of teaching her the difference between light and dark magic he had let her figure it out on her own. He hadn't wanted to return to that world. He had dabbled too deeply in magic and had paid severe consequences for it. He didn't want to face it more than he had to. He did the occasional spell for the sake of his slayer but no more than that. Teaching Willow, training her, would have taken years of working with magic. He nearly broke out in a sweat just at the thought of it. He had fought his own addiction to it. He couldn't fight hers. Sadly he was too ashamed to even warn her using his past as an example. So he had failed Willow. She had dabbled, she had learned on her own, and then she had fallen into the addiction.

He had failed his slayer on more occasions than he cared to think of. He had walked away from her. He had left her on her own to deal with a world too dark for any single mortal. He had assumed that she didn't need him. He had felt hurt each time she took another step away from him. He had felt anguish as she turned to others and to herself instead of to him. She was growing up and he hadn't liked it. So he had walked away. He had left her thinking he was doing the right thing. He had been glad each time he had been called back to help. He was sickened to admit that it had given him satisfaction that she still needed him. He suspected all parents went through something similar as their children grew up and grew out of them.

He had also failed Faith; the slayer he had never wanted. He was ashamed to admit it. As he watched her come back downstairs and hand out money to the girls, to his children, he admitted the truth to himself. He had never wanted her. She wasn't one of his children. She was too different, too independent, too hostile, too volatile, too dark. She wasn't anything like Buffy. That had been the main problem with Faith; she wasn't like Buffy. She didn't take orders. She didn't follow directions. She didn't listen. She didn't seem to care. He wasn't sure if that was who she actually was or the person she projected to the world. The facade to protect herself. It didn't matter though because he had come to know only the facade and he hadn't liked her. He hadn't taken her into consideration and when she had betrayed them he had patted himself on the back for never trusting her. It sickened him to think he had been so egotistical, so self righteous. He didn't like Faith because she was a representation of the person he had been in his youth. So wild, so rash and disrespectful of authority, so ready to do wrong for the sake of attention. He had ignored everything he had seen under the surface of her facade and she had paid the price for it. She had killed someone, she had turned to the mayor, and she had been taken by the Council.

He didn't doubt her story now. He knew the lengths the Council would go through to get what they wanted. If they wanted a perfect slayer they would have found a way to get one. If the world they had sent Faith to hadn't had their own Armageddon then they would have succeeded. However, regardless of his belief that she was being honest he couldn't turn off his distrust of her. She was too different. She was calm, controlled, systematic, and thoughtful. She behaved like a completely different person and he found it hard to believe, hard to trust someone who could make a complete change in personality in a matter of four years. No matter the consequences or the time range he knew that the core of a person did not change. Yet she was different and now he was left wondering if this was just another illusion, another facade.

"Here you go Giles." Faith said interrupting his mental process.

Looking up at the woman in front of him Giles took another sip of his tea. He didn't understand where his own hostility was coming from but he knew it was evident in her tensing up. She shifted her hand and placed a envelope onto the table next to him. "Thank you Faith." He finally managed to get out as he watched her turn and walk away. He knew she heard him because she nodded but she never turned back to him to acknowledge him. Releasing a small sigh he internally groaned at his own arrogance.

He was doing it again and he hadn't intended to. He was shutting her out. He didn't trust her he admitted that to be true. He didn't trust her because he didn't know her and that was his own fault. He needed to sit down and talk to her. He needed to accept the fact that he had screwed up in regards to her and to apologize for that fact. He needed to accept that his children were no longer children and that it was time to stop treating them as such. She had blatantly pointed out his failures and instead of accepting the truth of it he had resented her. It was time to stop. It was time to learn more about this strange new Faith, time to accept her as a member of the team. He would not help to isolate her this time.

Releasing another sigh Giles picked up his tea cup took a sip and set it down. Starring at the envelope he picked it up and was surprised at its weight. Opening it up he found several $100 bills along with a note. He counted the money first and was surprised that Faith had thought to give him so much as 'pin' money. The note merely said that they needed to talk. It was vague but since it was along the same lines as what he had been thinking he merely nodded his head subconsciously agreeing with her.

Tucking the envelope into his jacket he took another sip of his tea and stared out at the girls milling around the lobby. He hadn't thought things would go the way they had. He had never expected that in defeating the First they would activate every single Potential in the world. At the most he had hoped for survival and the worst a quick death. Now the world had changed. Faith was right that the girls would need training and that they would need funds to train said girls. He just didn't like how easily she did everything. It seemed without thought for consequences that she orchestrated everything. She didn't consult with him or with the others. She just did as she pleased. He supposed that was one of the reasons he was a little less than trusting in regards to Faith. She did things without consulting him.

Shaking his head slightly to shift his thoughts aside he focused on the reality of his situation. It wasn't pleasant. He was at the mercy of Faith if he wished to help the girls, to help his children. Again another reason he was distrustful of Faith. He disliked being at anyone's mercy. He disliked that they were fiscally dependent on her. Willow was right when she said Faith method was simpler and closer to obeying the law but it also put them at a disadvantage. If Willow had taken care of the financials he knew he wouldn't be so worried. He knew that Willow would ensure that they had absolute control of the funds. With Faith in charge of the financials he wasn't so sure. He didn't know how closely he loyalties laid with their objectives. She might want to go on a different path than the group and they would be powerless to stop her.

"Bugger" He swore out load voicing his inner frustration as quietly as possible. He hated the doubt and distrust running through his mind. He hated that he questioned every move that Faith made. That he questioned her motives. Yet he couldn't stop himself. Until he knew more about her, about her intentions, he wouldn't be able to let his distrust and resentment go.

"Giles?" He heard Willow call while searching for him. Raising his hand a little he drew her attention to his little corner of the lobby.

"What is it Willow?" He asked unable to hide the exhaustion from his voice.

"We are going to take the girls to lunch and then shopping like Faith said do you want to join us or want us to pick up anything for you?" She asked solicitous as always.

"No, I'm fine for now Willow. Thank you." He said a clear dismissal in his voice.

Nodding Willow turned away leaving the old watcher to his thoughts. She wondered why he was so broody lately. She suspected it was due mostly to Faith. It was clear as day that the Slayer got under Giles skin. She didn't understand why since the only thing Faith had done since returning to Sunnydale was help.

Moving towards the group of girls Willow gathered them up and began to prod them towards the exit. She wanted to get lunch out of the way and get the shopping done before Faith returned. She was more than curious about the properties Faith was looking at. Sighing she did her best to release her own personal resentment at not seeing the property and being stuck herding about the baby slayers.

"Why so glum Wills?" Xander asked seeing the little frown mar his best friend's brow.

"Oh you know just mourning the loss of everything. It's the first time we've really had to kinda think about everything that happened. Look back at everything we had to walk away from." She said thinking to distract Xander and only succeeding in making herself feel a little depressed. Her words had sparked the reality of their situation. Had reminded her of everything she had left behind; Tara specifically. She hadn't had enough time to say goodbye.

Xander stared at his friend for a moment longer before shifting his gaze to Giles. He saw then tension in the older man's shoulders and the grief in his best friends eyes. It was clear that something had happened between the watcher and the witch. He wasn't sure what it was but he assumed that Willow would tell him when she was ready. He didn't feel the need to poke and prod to reveal things anymore. He just watched and pieced things together over time. As the preacher had said it was something of a gift. He saw more than the others because he was willing to see, to look beyond the surface. He marveled at how much he had changed over the years. Shaking his head at his own thoughts he patted Willow lightly on the shoulder.

"I know what you mean Wills. It's still with us though, everything and everyone we left behind is still with us. It's just here" He said placing his hand gently on her chest above her heart. "And here" he caressed her hair. "It may sound corny but it's the truth." He finished wiping away the tear that had slid free. "Now let's not be too glum so early in the day. We have a gaggle of girls to take shopping and I think we will both need our strength. If you want we can have a little heart to heart tonight with a couple of drinks."

"I think that would be perfect." She said moving away from Xander. Ordering the girls into the vans Xander took the first van and Willow took the second. It would be hours before they finally returned to the hotel.

Going over the last piece of property Faith wished she was able to switch places with the others. She felt mentally and physically exhausted, emotionally she was beyond depleted, the reservoirs were empty and the fumes were quickly dissipating. Sucking in a deep breath she braced herself for the last tour. The building was rather nice. The apartments were recently renovated with a more modern look. It was clear the current owner had invested a lot of money in his building. It was no wonder he was making such a high return on rent. She imagined the rent to be a grand to two grand depending on the apartment. The realtor a Mr. John Langankamp was a rather over excited fellow who clearly was pleased at the first sign of interest. She guessed that the asking price was a deterrent for most investors and potential buyers. At nearly four million it was a hefty asking price but she liked the building. It was clean, it's security was top of the line, and the two apartments she had seen were rather impressive.

Stepping out of the building with Langankamp following closely behind Faith made her decision. She liked it, the group would like it, and it would be best to place a bid for the building as soon as possible. There was no point in losing the building to a new buyer. She knew their weren't that many people in the market for a 3.89 million dollar building but there was the possibility that someone would see it and decide it was worth it.

"I'll take it Mr. Langankamp." She said interrupting the man's enumerations of the buildings wonderful qualities and features. "How soon can I have the building cleared?" She asked deciding to get straight to business.

"Why would you want it cleared." Langankamp asked his face going blank with confusion.

"I don't intend to tear the building down Mr. Langankamp. I like the building very much in fact. However, I am opening up a school within the next year. A charity project of mine for underprivileged and misguided young women. This would be one of the off campus dormitories for the older girls." She said convincingly.

"I see Ms. Lehane, that's very noble of you." Langankamp replied clearly at a loss for what else to say. "I will have to speak to the seller and see about what arrangements can be made. I would hate to disappoint you but Mr. McClaren is very attached to this building and has been rather reluctant to sell even though it is necessary. He has refused the last three offers and raised the price twice as a discouragement to future buyers. I've become rather desperate. I'll make the offer to him and I will give you a call." Langankamp finished a slight blush creeping up his cheeks from over sharing.

"I see, well that is a little discouraging Mr. Langankamp. I can only imagine how nice a commission this piece of property will be for you. If Mr. McClaren would like to meet with me I would be more than happy to try to convince him to sell to me. I really do like the building." Faith said giving the realtor a thousand watt smile. "Please give me a call when you hear from Mr. McClaren." Faith finished shaking the realtor's hand and making her way back to her waiting limo.

Settling into the limo Faith considered everything she had accomplished since she had left the hotel. She had seen the first apartment and been satisfied if not impressed. She hadn't made a bid on the property because she wasn't amazed by it. If she had seen this building first she would have put in offer regardless of the fact that she hadn't seen the other building. As it was it looked like she might have to settle for the first building. It was nice and clean, but it wasn't as loved. It was simple, basic even, instead of the building she had just seen.

"Take me back to the hotel please." She said to the driver realizing she had been sitting in the car unmoving for several minutes. She was glad the day was over. She had placed a offer on two properties and one of them she was rather certain that she would get. The 100.43 acres was perfect. It was close enough to Cleveland that the girls could easily commute in for patrols. There was enough land and space that they could achieve some semblance of privacy. If they got the building she wanted then the girls old enough to slay solo wouldn't even have to commute. Everything was coming together rather nicely.

Pulling up in front of the hotel Faith stepped out of the car, thanked her driver, and straightend her three piece suit. She had to admit looking in the glass doors windows of the hotel that she looked very professional. She still pulled the look off rather well even if she did feel a bit like a imposter. Shaking away her strange thoughts she made her way into the hotel.

It was six thirty and the whole group was happily gathered in the lobby. Stepping into the chaos Faith was swarmed by the girls admiring her clothes, asking how her day was, telling her what they bought, asking what would they be doing next. She felt a little overwhelmed. For one brief moment with all those hands touching her, holding her, moving her, she felt herself transported to a place she didn't want to go. Dropping her notebook filled with the property information Faith pulled herself away from the group. Nearly running back outside she walked away from the hotel doing her best to gather her thoughts, to bring herself back from the edge.

"Faith are you okay?" She heard Dawn say from behind her. Shaking her head no she continued to walk taking deep breaths she wrapped her arms around herself. If she just kept moving just kept breathing it would all be okay, she would be fine.

Stopping abruptly Faith stared out at the street she had nearly walked into. She didn't want to die and walking onto a busy road seemed like a very dumb way to go. Turning around she looked at the worried face of Dawn. "Do you want to talk about it." Dawn asked reaching out to Faith. Nodding and shaking her head Faith took the younger woman's hand and let herself be led away from the curb.

"It was just too much Dawn, they were all around me and suddenly I was back there. It was just too much." Faith said shaking her head again. She felt confused. She felt lost. She felt as if she had lost control of her own body. She hated it.

"I figured it was something along those lines. They're not sure how to react around you now. They don't want to treat you differently. Sadly they don't know that touching you right now can have some rather unsavory side effects." Dawn said keeping her hand loose. She understood that Faith didn't want to be constrained, that she couldn't be.

"How do you know so much?" Faith asked her voice shaking slightly.

"Literature about the topic online. It's just the basics." Dawn replied moving back towards the hotel at a snail's crawl.

"God Dawn why did he do that to me? Why did he pick me? What did I do to deserve that?" Faith asked her voice getting choked up with each question. The tears threatened to fall and her knees felt weak.

"You didn't do anything Faith. It wasn't your fault. You didn't deserve what he did. It was wrong but it wasn't your fault." Dawn said catching Faith before the older woman collapsed onto the ground. Lowering them both to the pavement Dawn lightly wrapped her arms around the older woman. She held her repeating the mantra that it wasn't her fault as Faith broke down and cried. The tears soaked into her shirt and Dawn continued to coo softly. Her heart breaking as she listened to Faith sobbed and choked. Dawn didn't know how much time had passed or how long they had sat on the warm pavement. All she knew was that the tears had stopped and light hiccups had replaced the choked up sobs. "I'm here for you Faith." Dawn whispered softly feeling the older woman nod slightly in her arms.

Moving away slowly Faith stared at the young woman in front of her. She had never expected so much compassion, so much understanding from someone so young, from someone who didn't really know her. Yet here was Dawn offering all of those things. Wiping away her tears she nodded again. "Thank you for this Dawn." She said unwilling to comment on her break down.

"Do you think you are up for dinner with the whole group?" Dawn asked her voice as free of emotion as possible.

"I don't think so." Faith shook her head for emphasis.

"Okay then I'll take you back to your room. We can order in. I'll take some money to Giles or Buffy and have them take the girls out." Dawn said standing up and helping Faith to her feet. "We don't have to talk or I can leave you be." Dawn continued thinking that Faith might not want any company.

"I might not be much in the sense of company but I would like you to stay." Faith said looking at her feet. She felt a little clingy and she was ashamed.

"Alright then." Dawn said letting the silence fill the void between them.

Walking back into the hotel Dawn stopped the others with a look and guided Faith silently to her room. Entering her hotel room Faith went to the closet and pulled out a grand. Handing it over to Dawn she watched silently as the young woman walked out of her room. Turning on the TV she did her best to drown out the emotions threatening to overwhelm her. Sitting on the bed she stared blankly at the TV.

Walking back downstairs Dawn wasn't surprised by the group waiting confusedly in the lobby. The questions came at her faster than she could understand them. She didn't hear every single one but she got the general sense that everyone was worried about Faith. "She'll be fine." Dawn said once everyone had quieted down. "She wants all of you to go out and have dinner. She won't be joining you tonight. Save the questions till later okay when she feels up to it." Dawn said handing the money to Buffy and walking back to the elevator.

"Dawn where are you going?" Buffy asked clearly confused.

"I'm going to stay with Faith." Dawn said simply and stepped into the elevator. Walking back to the room Dawn braced herself. Knocking softly on the door she counted the seconds before Faith opened the door. Stepping into the room without a word she sat on the bed and looked at Faith. The older slayer's eyes were puffy and her nose a little red and swollen. It was the blankness of the eyes that worried Dawn.

"My mom was an alcoholic." Faith started picking up the remote and putting it on mute. "She wasn't the worst mom in the world. I've wondered over the years if I was the byproduct of a rape. My mother hated me to the point of wishing me out of existence. When she got really wasted she would tell me that I was a mistake, that she had never wanted me, that they made her have me. I always wondered who they were and why they would make her have me. I've never met my father and according to my mother I don't have one. She was mean and cruel but I loved her. It didn't matter that she was an alcoholic, or that sometimes she forgot I existed, or that she would hit me, I still loved her. She was my mom.

"She never let her 'friends' come near me though and the one time one of them took an interest in me she lost it. I still remember it like it was yesterday. His name was Daniel, he was a nice guy. He always said hi to me and brought me something. A bagel with cream cheese from Dunkin Donuts, a sandwich, a candy bar, just little things. I was always hungry since there was rarely food in the house. He just seemed like a really nice guy. One day he came over and my mom was on the balcony having a cigarette, he brought me a donut and asked me to sit with him on the couch. I remember him pulling me into his lap and talking to me. He tickled me lightly and said I was the prettiest thing he had ever seen. My mom walked in and saw him tickling me. She started screaming at him, she tore me off his lap and shoved me towards my room. I heard a bottle break and more screaming and I never saw Daniel again. She came to me afterwards and she was so angry. I had never seen my mom so angry. She hit me so hard, she told me never to let a man touch me. She told me that nice guys hurt you, that they took advantage. That I could never trust a man. I'm still surprised she contained herself. That she didn't beat me to an inch of my life she was so angry. I never went near one of her male friends again.

"It wasn't till I was ten that social services came and took me away. One of my teachers I suppose finally got tired of sending notes home asking my mom to get me a winter coat. I had few clothes that fit and even fewer that were winter appropriate. We didn't have the money and the few clothes I got were from good will or from my neighbor who had a daughter slightly older than me. She would occasionally think of me and pass down some of her daughters clothes. They never fit quiet right since I was such a skinny little thing. I was sixty pounds up until I hit thirteen." Faith stopped pausing to pull her legs up onto the bed, hugging them to herself.

"I remember when they took me away. They said it was only for a couple of days. I have never cried so much and begged so hard as I did that day. I didn't want to be taken away. I didn't want to leave my mom. Who would take care of her when I was gone? Who would take care of me? I begged them, I pleaded and they promised that it would only be a few days. They packed up my clothes and the police officer picked me up kicking and screaming and took me away. I remember crying at my mom that I was sorry, that I wouldn't do whatever I had done if she would just let me stay. She didn't even look at me. She just turned away and walked out to the balcony without a word to me. When they took me outside I remember looking up at our apartment hoping to catch one last look at my mom but she was gone. Just like that in a matter of moments my mom was gone. I never saw her again." Faith stopped pausing to wipe the tears that had slowly started to streak down her face.

Dawn listened intently her own tears quietly treading down her cheeks. She hadn't expected this type of confession from Faith. She hadn't expected to learn so much about the dark slayer. She had always suspected that Faith life was a difficult one but she had no idea it had been so traumatic. She couldn't imagine losing her mother in such away. She couldn't picture how she would feel at the age of ten to be dragged away and given to strangers. She understood grief, she understood the pain of losing a parent, she just couldn't imagine having to suffer through it at such a young age. Feeling that Faith had stopped, that she was done sharing, for now at least, Dawn wrapped her arms around the older woman. In silence she held Faith and waited until Faith was ready to make the next move.

Letting the younger woman hug her Faith took several deep breaths. She felt some comfort from the touch, it wasn't demanding or overwhelming. It was empathy and comfort in the most basic form. She knew that Dawn had experienced the loss of a parent. She knew that on some level Dawn could relate. It felt refreshing to reveal that part of her life to someone. Out of all the people she knew in her own world none of them knew anything about her. She suspected Giles and Wesley had the bare facts but she knew that didn't know anything about her life experiences.

"So what do you feel like for dinner?" Faith finally asked breaking the silence.


	18. Chapter 18

Buffy wasn't sure what she was feeling. Watching her little sister walk out of Faith's bedroom at eight in the morning was a little disconcerting. It was the last thing she expected to see of that she was sure. She knew it was innocent or at least the logical side of her knew it was innocent. She suspected that Faith needed some comfort and that Dawn provided it. The niggling bit of doubt though whispered into her ear asking what type of comfort had Dawn provided?

Shaking her head and clearing away the doubts Buffy walked to her sister's room and knocked. She wanted to know what happened last night while the group was at dinner. She knew if she asked Faith that she wouldn't be able to contain her jealousy, her fear, or her doubt. So she choose the easier route in Dawn. She could rant and rave and Dawn and she knew she would be forgiven within the day.

"Hey Buffy" Dawn said opening the door and stepping aside.

"Why you wearing last night's clothes Dawn?" Buffy asked with as much innocent curiosity she could muster.

"I spent the night with Faith, didn't think to bring a spare set of clothes." Dawn replied turning around and moving to her duffle bag.

Buffy let the door close behind her and tried not to let her jaw drop in shock. Her mind must be perverted and that's why she took Dawn's innocent words and defiled them with her own perversion. That had to be it. Dawn had spent the night comforting Faith and Buffy was a pervert. Shaking her head Buffy looked her little sister over searching for a clue that she might be wrong.

"Why did you spend the night?" Buffy finally asked hoping she was just a pervert.

"Really Buffy? God you are ridiculous. After everything Faith has just been through you think the type of comfort I would offer would be sexual? She was raped for crying out loud! It might be easier for her because I'm a woman but that would be something that could happen in the future not so soon after." Dawn broke out turning to give her sister one incredulous look before turning back to her bag and picking out an outfit.

Buffy's brain hit a wall at her sisters words. 'that would be something that could happen in the future'. Did that mean Dawn was interested in Faith? Sexually? Romantically? "Are you interested in Faith? Dawn are you a ..." Buffy stopped unsure where she wanted to go with her line of questioning.

"No Buffy I am not a lesbian and no I wasn't implying that I am sexually interested in Faith. Don't get me wrong Faith is beautiful. She is a fine example of feminine sensuality but I've never had an inclinations towards women, well nothing beyond the passing curiosity and mild attraction." Dawn laid out her outfit and looked at her sister. "Faith needs someone to confide in right now. She needs someone who won't judge her. She needs someone she can trust. I'm just being a good friend to someone who really needs one right now." Dawn said becoming serious. "She's had a hard life Buffy and it's going to be a while before she can move on from what happened. If she ever moves on. She's strong but you never get over something like that you know?" Dawn said hoping her sister would remember her own near experience and relate to Faith.

Nodding Buffy tried to wrap her brain around everything her sister had just told her. "Dawnie has anyone ever..." She stopped again unsure how to forge into the strange uncomfortable territory.

"No, I've never been raped, or molested, or anything else. The closest I ever got to this topic before was you and I didn't even know it. When I knew what happened to Faith I wanted to be there for her so I did some research. I don't know everything and I'm certainly not a trained counselor but I do have ears and I can listen. I might not know what to say all the time but I'll do my best and that's all that matters right now." Dawn replied answering all of her sisters unasked questions. Buffy never spoke of her incident with Spike and Dawn never pushed her into speaking about it. When Buffy was ready Dawn hoped she would talk to her about it. Until then Dawn would just wait. It was the only thing she could really do anyways.

"So what should I do?" Buffy asked feeling a little lost.

"There's not much to do really. You wait until she is ready to talk to her. You listen to what she has to say. You trust her. You encourage her and stand by her. She needs our support even if she doesn't say anything. She needs to know that we are on her side through this and that we don't judge her for what happened." Dawn sat down on the bed and thought of what else she could tell her sister. "She may go through a whole range of emotions. She may have mood swings, post traumatic stress, flash backs, anger, rage, control issues. There are a variety of ways this could all go. We just have to be here for her through it all." Dawn stressed the last part hoping to impart on her sister that rash judgments could be detrimental.

Buffy nodded again. "I can do that. Thanks Dawnie and I'm sorry." She said before turning around and making her way out into the hallway and down to the lobby to wait for the others to gather. She had a lot to think about.

Dawn smiled and shook her head as she watched Buffy slip out of her room. She knew without asking what the apology was for. The idea that Buffy thought she was having a sexual relationship with Faith said more than it didn't. It was clear as day that Buffy was interested in Faith in a very non platonic sense of the word. It was a pity that those feelings had come at such an inconvenient time. Faith was nowhere near ready to enter into any type of relationship. There was a lot of hurt and a lot of healing to get through before anything would or could happen between the two. They had to work through their trust issues, their past, and most importantly their feelings for each other.

The hotel didn't have a traditional breakfast but it did have a continental service. Buffy supposed they could easily eat here but she knew no one wanted bagels, muffins, and cold cereal for breakfast. The coffee and tea were especially horrible. It was a bad topping to a overall mediocre breakfast. So they opted for going out again. She could only imagine how much they were spending on a daily basis. She hadn't thought about it before. Faith never said a word about how much they spent. She never curtailed them or lectured them on their spending habits. Then again Faith rarely lectured or judged. She let things happen and lightly encouraged people to do things the way she wanted. Buffy marveled at how easily Faith had taken control of the girls. How quickly she had become the group leader. Buffy didn't even remember giving up control. One day everyone was looking at her to guide them through the next battle and the next everyone was looking at Faith. It seemed rather sudden but Buffy knew otherwise.

She remembered Willow enumerating on Faith's deeds with the girls. Regardless of whether or not Faith intended to she had laid down the ground work for becoming the group's leader. She had earned the girl's trust and Buffy knew without a doubt that if she or any member of the Originals balked and left that the new slayers would still follow Faith. They trusted her implicitly. It was a strange role reversal that Buffy had never anticipated. She had always been followed, been looked to as a leader, and now she wasn't.

Feeling the urge for a little caffeine Buffy stood up and walked to the breakfast room. She disliked the coffee but it was caffeine and she was willing to suffer through it for a little pick me up. She was mixing her small cup of sludge when Willow walked up behind her breaking into her pensive thoughts.

"Hey Buffy, you're actually going to drink that stuff?" Willow greet cheerfully.

Looking down at the sludge with too much cream and sugar Buffy nodded her head. "It's what's available and I need something to get my brain going. Why are you so chipper this morning?"

"Just woke up on the right side of the bed." Willow said smiling. It was clear the witch's new lover was keeping her all shades of happy.

"I'm guessing I already know what has you in such a happy mood." Buffy said with a smirk. The ensuing blush was the only confirmation she needed. Nodding Buffy walked back into the lobby and sat back down. She wasn't surprised to see her best friend follow suit.

"Okay so what has you so glum?" Willow asked taking a seat with a cup of cheap Earl Grey.

"I was just thinking about Faith."

"And that got you into such a glum and pensive mood?"

"Well yeah I mean we don't know her Willow and I am beginning to wonder if we ever did." Buffy started taking a sip of her sludge and frowning. Willow merely nodded in agreement waiting for her friend to continue. "This morning I saw Dawn walk out of Faith's room and the first thought in my mind was that Faith had taken advantage of my little sister. I mean what is wrong with me to think such a thing. I know or at least I have an idea about what Faith is going through and I know she's in a bad place right now. The last thing on her mind is sex of any kind."

"Yeah but the Faith we knew would have used Dawnie, just like she used Xander." Willow stated simply an edge of hurt coming into her voice.

"Maybe but the Faith we knew is gone if she ever even existed." Buffy said on a sigh remember the wild girl she once knew and had fallen for.

"Meaning?" Willow stressed the word trying to draw out Buffy's thoughts. She had her own in regards to Faith and most were on the positive side. She approved of the new Faith and the memory of the old one was faded and mostly forgotten.

"I mean that we didn't know her last name, her birth date, her parents, if she has parents, her history, or hell anything about her. I mean looking back the only thing I know about Faith's past is that her mom was an alcoholic and never got her a puppy. Seriously that's not a lot to go on in judging a person. What she did while in Sunnydale wasn't great but she helped us more than she hurt us. She's a slayer and she easily could have killed us if she wanted to. She was a lot like Angelus, she played with us, she toyed with us, but unlike Angelus she never killed one of us. She always stopped before going too far. I know she killed Professor Wirth and that is saying she definitely was going over the deep end but she never really hurt us. It was just toying with us emotionally and occasionally physically. She even helped us defeat the mayor. She was the key to it all really. If she hadn't been in a coma the mayor never would have followed me into the school. I can't even think how we would have killed him otherwise.

"Then she was gone and I didn't even think about her. I never once wondered where she was if she was awake or if she was okay. I stabbed her and put her into a coma and I never gave her a second thought. What does that say about me Willow? Now she's back and she helped us and I don't know how to act around her. I don't know how to help her. You would think after what happened between me and Spike that I would have some clue as to how to help her but I don't. I've felt weak, I've felt helpless, I've felt like a victim but I still can't relate to her on what she just experienced because I've never experienced anything so horrible." Buffy stopped unsure what else she could say.

"Do you want to talk about Spike?" Willow asked laying a hand lightly on her best friends shoulder.

"What can I say about him Wills? He loved me and I felt something for him. Yet I don't know. How can I feel something like love for a man who tried to rape me? I'm not even sure I ever forgave him. Everything just happened so quickly. I mean one night he tries to rape me, the next he's got a soul and completely out of his mind wandering the basement of the school. How could I refuse to help him? Then we were at war and now he's dead. I didn't have time to process everything that happened between us. I'm still so confused about it. I'm like is it worth it being angry at someone whose dead? Will it solve anything? Will it make me feel better? Will it make this gut wrenching self hatred go away?"  
"Why do you hate yourself?"

"Because I caused him to be that way. I made him into a monster." Buffy couldn't help the slight sob that escaped her.

"Why do you think that?" Willow asked softly hoping to get Buffy to reveal her emotions, her thoughts about the past. She knew that they all had to grieve, had to process everything that had happened over the last couple of years. She had spent part of the night with Xander doing just that. They had laughed, cried, and held each other over a couple of beers.

"I asked him to be rough, to be cold, to use me. I needed to feel something after I came back and feeling ashamed and dirty and wrong was better than feeling nothing. I hurt him and made him hurt me. I am sick and twisted inside Willow. He tried to rape me because he thought I wanted it. I disgust myself just thinking about the lengths I put him through."

"Oh goddess, is that what you have been thinking over the last couple of years? Buffy, goddess, Buffy none of that was your fault. You didn't make him do anything. He did it because he wanted to. Nobody makes a rapist rape people. They are responsible for their own actions. You blame the rapist not the victim. I mean seriously Buffy. Would you blame a vampire for biting you or would you blame yourself? Just because you walk alone at night it is not a invitation to get bitten by a vampire. Just like a woman walking alone on a darkened street is not an invitation for her to get raped. When Spike attacked you it was because he wanted to. He wanted you back and he figured if he could break you he could have you. You fought back and you kept him from hurting you. I can't imagine how you felt Buffy but it was not and never will be your fault. Put the blame where it belongs, don't take it on yourself." Willow said feeling a touch of anger radiating through her.

Buffy stared at her friend amazed at the passion infusing her voice. It was clearly a subject Willow felt very strongly about. "It's hard Wills. It's hard not to feel ashamed, not to feel wrong. There is so much about the last couple of years that I wish I could change."

"I understand completely. But we can't change the past. If we could I wouldn't have done a lot of things." Willow said softly thinking about all the things she regretted. There was such a long list of things she had done wrong. So many things she thought had been the right thing to do. How often had her good intentions led her astray? Most of it had been small things and yet they had changed everything.

Wiping her eyes Buffy was surprised that she had been crying. Looking at her best friends sad down cast eyes she wondered what had gotten her friend so down so quickly. "Heavy thoughts?"

"I raped Tara." Willow gasped out. A wave of shame washing over her.

"You what?" Buffy asked completely confused at the change of topics.

"I wiped her mind. I had sex with her when she didn't remember what I had done." Willow sobbed out.

"Willow how is that rape?" Buffy asked feeling out her element.

"Don't you get it? She didn't know what I had done. I had wiped away her memories. I had taken away the reasons why she was angry with me. I wiped away her will, her choice. She wouldn't have touched me, we were fighting and she didn't give her full consent. I mean I didn't hold her down, or force her but I took advantage of her. It was like taking advantage of a completely wasted woman. I can't believe I did that to her." Willow said breaking into full shaking sobs.

"Oh god Willow. I mean god. I'm sorry." Buffy said unsure of what she was even apologizing for. Feeling unsure of what else to do she just wrapped her best friend in a hug and held her. She couldn't offer absolution. She couldn't erase what had been done. Nor could she condone it. She didn't know how she felt about the whole situation. Willow had taken advantage of the situation but Buffy wasn't sure it constituted rape. Then again it wasn't her it had been done to. She couldn't help but consider that a woman who was date raped was still raped. She might be willing because of the drug but she wasn't really willing. Her consent was taken away, her will and ability to make a choice were removed. So yeah if she thought about it Willow had raped Tara.

"I'm not sure what you want me to say Wills. What you did was wrong and I can't forgive you for it. Only Tara could and I would like to think that eventually she would have." Buffy said once the tears had stopped. She couldn't help but look at her friend and confidante in a new less bright light.

"I know and that is the most painful part of it all. I can't ever tell her I'm sorry. I thought I would have more time. I thought one day we would be able to talk about it. I thought one day I would tell her and I would face her anger and rage but we would talk and she would forgive me. Now I can't, now none of that is ever going to happen." Willow said wiping away her tears. Looking at the lobby she was grateful that they were in a quiet corner and even more grateful that no one else had come down yet.

"Come on let's go for a walk." Buffy said getting up and reaching down to help Willow. It was clear they all had a lot to talk about.


	19. Chapter 19

Faith walked downstairs feeling a little lighter after her conversation with Dawn. She was especially happy after hearing from her realtor for the 100.43 acre lot. Her bid had been accepted. It was one less thing to worry about with ten more to worry about instead. Now she had to find an architect to design the school and a contractor to build it.

Walking through the lobby she was surprised to see only a couple of girls sitting in the lobby. She had expected everyone to already be gathered. Releasing a sigh of slight frustration she made her way to the girls and took a seat. She supposed she should see how they were all doing. She had been seriously lacking in regards to the girls.

"Hey ladies how are things going?" She asked feeling as if that was the most lame opener she could have possibly thought of.

"Not bad all things considered." Kennedy responded smiling and making room on the couch for Faith.

"Have you seen Buffy or Willow?" She asked wondering where the witch was if her partner was down here with the rest of the girls.

"She spotted Buffy when we came down and then they went out for a little heart to heart. It's been going around." Kennedy remarked looking at Faith with curiosity.

"I bet." Faith said smirking at the younger woman. It was as obvious as the nose on her face that the girls were curious about what had happened to her. She wanted to tell them, she wanted to explain, but it was too hard to put into words. It was too hard to express to such a large group of relative strangers. It was a vulnerability she couldn't endure. "One day I'll share with you guys okay just not now, not yet." She said hoping to assuage their curiosity. "So really how are you all dealing? I know I wasn't around for the last week or so and I really wanted to make sure you are all doing alright?"

"Are you expecting us all to have a heart to heart here in the lobby?" Molly asked looking around the group.

"Well it is a little open but we can't really do much better right now. I don't want to rent a conference room just for a little tete a tete." Faith said feeling a little exasperated.

"What we don't merit a little privacy? A conference room is too much to ask for?" Rona piped out indignantly.

Feeling her level of frustration rise Faith started to get up only to have Kennedy stop her. "Faith we are just screwing around with you. Every time you've been around us you've been all business. We just want the more open Faith around for a bit. We're all doing fine really. I mean yeah it was harsh. It was a experience and a fight that none of us really believed we would survive but most of us did and we are happy to be here."

Sitting back down Faith stared at the smiling girls wondering if it would really be wrong to smack them all into oblivion. She wasn't in the mood to be toyed with. She wasn't in the mood for games. This was serious. Everything about what they did in the next coming days, weeks, months, and years was serious. They had changed the world and the consequences were still a mystery but she imagined they would be grave. "I'm sorry I've been so somber as of late, just absorbing everything, it has been a lot to take in." She said taking a deep breath and reigning in her own anger. She knew the girls were trying to diffuse the serious nature of their current situation with humor.

"I am still worried about how you all are dealing though." She started again. "We made you all into Slayers but we didn't really give you a choice in the matter. We have changed your lives and some of you might not consider it for the better. We have forced on you a life of danger, secrecy, and solitude. It isn't easy being a slayer and I am sorry you were pushed into this life. I want to know how you are doing? How you are dealing?" She stopped and looked at the girls hoping for some hint as to how they really were.

"I don't know Faith I mean I haven't fully even processed everything that happened. What do you want us to say? We may not all have wanted to become slayers but what choice did we have? If we had stayed as potentials there was a higher chance that we would lose. Hell even if we had been able to survive it there is a high chance the majority of us wouldn't be here. I don't know about the rest but I am happy to be on the breathing end of the spectrum." Kennedy said looking around at the other girls and seeing several nods of agreement.

"If you could go back to being a normal girl would you?" Faith asked suddenly feeling a wave of despair wash over her.

"No." Kennedy stated emphatically. "It's what I was meant to be."

The other girls all nodded in agreement again and Faith began to wonder if they were just following Kennedy's lead. Releasing a sigh she made a mental note to note only speak to the girls individually but to have a long talk with Willow. They had to find a way to reverse the calling for the girls who did not like or want the lifestyle. She didn't know if it was possible but they had to look either way. They didn't give the girls a choice and the ones here might want this life after everything they had see but there were plenty of girls out there who hadn't and who wouldn't want it.

"Okay good." Faith said filling the void that had accompanied Kennedy's statement. "Alright so..." Faith paused wondering what else to say."Well I guess all of you would like a small update huh? We got the piece of land I made a bid for. It's where I plan for the school to be built. Sadly we are still waiting for the other two properties to respond." She finally said feeling it was easier to resort to business as usual.

Shifting her attention away from the girls Faith noticed everyone had made their way down to the lobby. Getting up she motioned for the girls to follow. She was more than ready to get breakfast over with. The sooner it was over the sooner she could start searching for a contractor, taking the group to the bank, and finding a good lawyer. She knew the law relatively well but they would need a lawyer to handle the majority of legal aspects regarding opening a private school.

Releasing a breath of frustration Faith was grateful that breakfast was over. It had been quiet with only the sound of silver ware moving to break up the silence. It had been mildly eerie and nerve wracking. Faith knew the girls were reacting to the tension of the adults but it was impossible to lighten the mood. Faith had no idea what was going on between Willow and Buffy but it had been clear since the two woman returned that their discussion had been rather serious. Giles was quiet with a look of discontent that made Faith want to lash out. Dawn had made a few half hearted attempts to lighten the mood and Xander was deep in a hushed conversation with Anya. Overall Faith had found the entire morning painful. She suspected it would be more productive for her to avoid them. She had wasted nearly two hours suffering through breakfast. In that time she could have already started interviewing lawyers and searching for a contractor.

Now the day felt half over and she had nothing done. She still had to take the originals as she liked to call them in her mind to the bank and she knew that she had to have a good long talk with Giles. The talk however was going to be placed on the back burner again. She had things she wanted done as soon as possible and wasting time assuaging an old man's fears was not on her immediate to do list. Entering the hotel Faith stepped away from the group and made her way back to her room. She had several calls to make and she needed to change clothes. She failed to see the disappointed looks on the new slayers eyes or the disapproving glare from Giles.

Entering her room Faith released a sigh of relief and turn on her laptop. She began immediately on a search for a business lawyer. She wanted a relatively small practice since she felt they would be able to provide a more in-depth and personal relationship. It was moments like this that she was grateful for the internet. A two hour search and four phone calls later and she had appointments to meet with the different firms. Another hour and a half later and two phone calls and she had interviews with two architectural design firms. She wanted to keep everything local not only for the convenience of communication but also to help contribute to the local economy. She had every intention of having all the contractors be local and small company. She knew it would be faster to have a larger business do the work but a smaller company she hoped would be a little more dedicated. The problem of finding a contractor however would have to wait until she decided on which architectural company to go with.

Looking over at the clock Faith was a little surprised to see how much time had gone by. It was already late afternoon and she had a meeting with Mr. Donnelly the realtor in charge of the acreage. She had several documents to review and sign. Shutting down her laptop Faith went to the closet, pulled out a pant suit and went to the bathroom to change. The phone ringing as she stepped out of the bathroom wasn't much of a surprise. She suspected it was the front desk calling to tell her that the limo was waiting outside.

"Hello" She said casually.

"Good afternoon Ms. Lehane, this is John Langankamp."

"What a surprise Mr. Langankamp, I had expected to wait a little bit long before I heard a reply from you." Faith said with a smile hopping that things were finally coming together smoothly.

"Well yes I had as well to be honest. I am calling to ask you to dinner."

"Excuse me?" Faith asked completely confused by the turn in conversation.

"Not like that I am sorry. I spoke to Mr. McClaren and he has decided to consider your offer. The only condition to his consideration however is that he would like to have dinner with you and discuss your intention for his building." John Langankamp said with thinly veiled frustration.

"I see well of course I said I would be more than willing to meet with him." Faith replied holding back her sigh of relief.

"Are you available tonight?"

"Um, yes I can be." Faith said internally grateful for not having to go through dinner with the group. It wasn't much better going through dinner with a stranger but it would probably be a little less tense.

"Alright then I'll email you the address and the directions."

"What time should I be there for dinner?" Faith smiled into the phone at Mr. Langankamp's rush to end the conversation.

"Six o'clock would be best." John said. "I hope all goes well for you Ms. Lehane." He said before hanging up.

Looking at the phone Faith shook her head before hanging up. Picking it back up she called the limo company and ordered a limo for five thirty. She figured it would be enough time for her to get to where ever Mr. McClaren lived. She made sure to also have it waiting to take her home.

Releasing a small sigh she made a mental note to go car shopping the second they were able to purchase the apartment building. They needed a better mode of individual transportation than the vans. Stopping at the bathroom one more time to check herself in the mirror Faith made her way downstairs. She was surprised to see that the lobby was empty. Looking around she spotted the limo waiting outside. Raising her hand she made her way to the front desk asking to use the phone she called up and left a message on Buffy's and Dawn's phone. She hoped one of them would think to look. She also left a note with the front desk in case they stopped their to ask for her.

Walking out of the hotel she greeted the limo driver and slid into the back seat. Confirming the address she sat back and closed her eyes. She felt tired and she wasn't sure why. She was a slayer and she shouldn't be feeling so off. She couldn't remember if Echo had felt this tired then again she wasn't really willing to delve into Echo's memories of the last couple of weeks. She hated to admit it but the thought of seeing how her body was after it happened was a little too much. She couldn't help but wonder how other women dealt with being raped. How they were able to cope with seeing their bodies after the fact. She hadn't had to and she was beyond grateful for it.

"Ms?" The driver asked as he opened the door. "We're here."

Opening her eyes Faith was surprised she had dozed off. Nodding her head in thanks and in acknowledgement Faith stepped out of the car and made her way to the bank. She had decided to skip the process of taking everyone to the bank and just get everything over with on her own. She had made copies of their licenses and that would be enough as a form of identification considering it was her business account.

Stepping into the office she walked over to one of the desks and took a seat. After some light conversation she got to business. She ordered new checks for the account, one bank card for each name on the account, and a bank check for the amount of the property and closing costs. In half an hour she was out and back into the car on her way to meet Mr. Connelly.

The drive to Connelly's office was relatively short. Faith made quick work of reviewing the paperwork, signing in the appropriate places, and delivering the check. The entire process took less than an hour and Faith was grateful for it. She was unaccountably tired and the only thing she could think of was going back to the hotel and taking a short nap before her dinner meeting with McClaren. Leaving the small office Faith asked the driver to take her home. The property was theirs and as soon as she had a lawyer, a architect and a contractor they could get the ball really rolling.

The thought of how much there was left to do was rather daunting and Faith considered who she could delegate some of the work too. She assumed considering Xander's past experience as a construction worker that he would be the best man to be in charge of finding a contractor. She supposed that Willow could be in charge of speaking to the architect along with Xander to decide what the school should look like. Buffy then could be in charge of its aesthetic design in regards to the interior. She knew beyond interviewing the perspective firms that she didn't particularly want to be overly involved. She had other things to worry about in regards to building and running a school.

She also had various topics to bring up to the group. The most important one was amazingly enough their levels of educations. If they were going to open a school they would need teachers. Personally she had no real issue with hiring teachers but she wanted that the school become a little more independent. The world of vampires and demons was still expected to remain something of a secret. She knew as a whole the world was not ready for the introduction of demons or vampires or witches. Humans in general were panicky, stupid creatures, who would probably be as quick to judge slayers as evil as they would vampires. She knew that individuals could be just as bad as the population as a whole but there was a better chance of finding at least a handful of reasonable people who would be able to accept their reality. Then again there was the possibility of hiring outsiders and keeping them relatively ignorant. It would be a little difficult but they had the funds to alter the school and allow for a separate library to keep the books of demonology.

The limo stopping brought Faith back to the present. Getting out of the car she thanked her driver and made her way straight to her room. She didn't even bother to look around the lobby to see if anyone was around. She wanted a nap more than she wanted to deal with people who demanded more of her than she could offer.

Stepping into her room she leaned against the door and released a sigh of relief that she hadn't been stopped. Walking further in she stripped off her clothes and laid them carefully out. She had no intentions of wasting precious napping time searching for a new outfit. Sliding in between the sheets she smiled and closed her eyes more than ready to sleep. Groaning she remembered to set the alarm. Sitting up she turned and set the alarm for five. She figured it would give her enough time to redress, get the address, and get downstairs.

It was exactly five fifty five when Faith's town car pulled up in front of Mr. McClaren's mansion. Looking at the large house Faith refrained from whistling. Instead she turned to her driver handed him a twenty and told him to go get something to eat. She told him as long as he was back before seven she would be fine. It was a bold assumption that everything would go right. However, that assumption was based on the fact that even if Mr. McClaren refused her offer she would still be respectful enough to eat a meal with him. It was proper after all.

Walking up to the door Faith slid her purse over her shoulder and rang the door bell. A tall gentleman dressed in a suit opened the door. Faith wondered if he was the help or a member of the family. The look he gave her and the quick inspection made her think he was a butler.

"Ms. Lehane welcome." The man said opening the door wider and welcoming her in. "Mr. McClaren is in the drawing room, please follow me." He said after double checking that she didn't have a coat or jacket that needed to be disposed of.

Nodding in acceptance Faith followed the suited fellow through a series of hallways and into a well appointed room. Taking a quick look around she had to admit, if only to herself, that she was impressed. In a past life she had a home very similar to this one though much larger. She knew the ways of the top tier. She knew the correct mannerisms and etiquette. Stepping into the drawing room she was greeted by a rather robust gentleman sitting in a large masculine chair. It didn't feel like it belonged in the room, it was too dark and male for such a feminine room.

"Ms. Lehane, welcome I'm Robert McClaren." The man in the chair said standing up to shake hands with her. Mr. McClaren was obviously an older gentleman but Faith doubted he was over sixty years old. For some reason she had drawn a picture of an elderly and frail man in her mind. The reality was a little shocking. Shaking hands Faith took the seat he motioned and ordered a drink from the butler Edmund.

Accepting her glass of Chardonnay she turned her attention to her host and smiled. "Well Mr. McClaren have you considered my offer?" She asked hoping to get things going.

"I have but I would like to hold off on discussing that aspect until after dinner if you don't mind. I would just like to get to know you. I'm an old man and company at my age is a lot harder to find than you would think." He said with a smile.

Smiling Faith wondered if the old man was hitting on her. He was hardly senile and old wasn't really a word she would label him with. He wasn't young that was certain but he was hardly the version of old she pictured in her mind. It was clear the man was still rather active. He was just now going soft around the middle, his muscles weren't in poor condition so she didn't suspect any type of chronic or acute illness, over all he was a picture of health. It left her wondering why he had to sell his property and why he was so reluctant to do so.

"Well what would you like to talk about?" She asked doing her best not to sound coy.

"I figured we could get to know each other a little better. Tell me something about yourself." He asked and again Faith wondered if he was hitting on her or trying to decide if she was a decent person.

"Alright that is a rather broad question but I suppose I could go over the basics. I grew up in Boston, moved to California when I was sixteen to live with my grandfather. When he died I went to University in Los Angeles and got my degree in Education. I got my masters from my UCLA in administration then I spent some time travelling around the world. A grand tour some might call it. Most of my family was gone and there really wasn't anything holding me to the U.S. I spent some time in Russia, Italy, France, England, Japan, and finished off in Saudi Arabia." She paused to see how interested he was and seeing that he was looking at her keenly she continued.

"My travels taught me a lot and when I returned to the States I decided to open up a school. You see my grandfather was rather wealthy but my parent weren't. My mother had married against my grandfather's wishes and he refused to have anything to do with her." She lies easily going with the story the Council had created for her with minor embellishments. "We were rather poor and I got myself into several scrapes though nothing serious. When my parents died my grandfather took me in and gave me a better life. Sadly he passed away not long after my parents in a explosion. There was a gas leak in the school he was giving a speech. He went back to see if anyone was in the building when it exploded. He died a hero." Faith lowers her voice becoming a little choked up. She can't help but internally smile at how good of an actor she actually is. "During my travels I met some of the right people, made some very good investments, and discovered my dream of helping other young women. I have a group of investors already and we have just bought the property for the school to be built on." She tells him hoping to draw him to her side.

"Dinner is ready sir." Edmund states holding the door open. Faith and Robert rise in unison leaving behind their respective glasses and making their way to the dining room. Faith isn't surprised by the size of the table nor by the elegance of the room. Taking the seat Edmund pulls out she lays her napkin on her lap and waits patiently for the meal to begin.

Edmund she finds is going to be serving them when she sees him pouring her another glass of wine and serving Robert as well. Another man brings out the first course; lobster bisque. She isn't very impressed by the soup since the lobster doesn't taste nearly as fresh as she had eaten while still in Boston. Going through the soup, then the salad Faith eats in semi silence hoping Robert will delve a little into his life. She is a little curious still about his issue with selling his building.

"So Ms. Lehane if you already have the property for your school why would you like to purchase my building?" Robert asks after the main course had been served.

"The school is still a year away since it needs to be built from the ground up. The reason I would like to purchase your building is because I would like a place to house the older girls. The young women who graduate from our school. We will be a private school but most importantly we will be non-profit. Our school will provide housing for our graduates along with assistance in getting their college education. I am sorry to say this sir but money is a necessity in our society. The government can help only so much and more often than not it hinders its own citizens. Public schools do not have the same standards as schools in Japan or parts of Europe. We are willingly falling behind and worse we are raising the cost of education in the process. Soon a high school diploma will be meaningless. The minimum for an entry level position will one day be a bachelors degree. I want to arm these underprivileged and damaged young women with the skills and support they need to succeed in this world." She finished surprised by how much passion she actually had for the topic.

Silence filled the room and for a moment Faith was worried that she had said the wrong thing. She knew it wasn't really wrong since she had only spoken her mind and her feelings on the subject of her school. Not all the girls that would come to the school would be underprivileged but she suspected more than one would be damaged in one way or another. They had forced so much onto these new unknown young women and she knew without a doubt that they were now her responsibility. She had to guide them, to help them, or if they chose to relieve them of the burden of being a slayer. She knew the life was not for everyone, sometimes the older she got she wondered if it was meant for her.

"Well Ms. Lehane I had intended on discussing the topic of my building after dinner but I suppose we should start it now." Robert said breaking the silence. "If you haven't been able to tell I am a relatively wealthy man. That wealth has brought me great comfort and allowed me to explore every aspect of my curiosity. However, that wealth will not come with me when I die." Robert paused and took a sip of his wine. "You see I am dying. I know I don't look it but the reality of the matter is I've been living with a defective heart. It has lasted me a long time, a lot longer than any of my doctors ever expected it to. I've lived a long and fulfilling life and even though I have on occasion considered extending it I have decided not to. I know the realities of aging and the realities of a heart transplant. I'm too old to make it onto the donor list but I could easily travel outside of the United States and find a heart. But I don't want that life. I don't want to spend my final years being overly cautious because I have to be on immunosuppressant's. I don't want a life filled with pills, doctors appointments, and sickness. My heart will fail but I will die knowing I had a great life. My children are grown and out of the house. My wife passed away four years ago and I have missed her dearly. I do not resent the idea of joining her sooner than I had intended." Again Robert paused as if to gather his thoughts.

"That particular building was something of a special project for me." He stopped took a sip of wine as if he needed a bit of fortitude. "After my wife died I went to a very dark place. It might sound dramatic but life had lost its meaning. I loved my wife very dearly and my sole goal in life had been to make her happy. I spent years amassing my fortune, being ruthless in business, sparing no time for my children all to make sure we lived in comfort. I felt cheated that I had worked so hard and in the end I had missed it all. All the time I could have spent with my wife and children I wasted working and travelling. When I bought that building it didn't look anything like it does now. I tore it up from the inside out. I rebuilt each apartment, expanded most of them, and created something I am very proud of. I didn't give the work to contractors or designers I did everything on my own. It took me three years of hard back breaking work. It's also what saved me from falling into the abyss." He stopped again leaving Faith curious.

"I am sorry but I am also confused." She said hoping for a bit of clarification. "If you worked so hard on that building why in the world are you trying to sell it?"

"Ms. Lehane I love my children but I am sorry to say that they don't hold as much affection for me. I was a hard man to live with and a difficult father to please. I demanded only the best and punished them severely for not meeting my expectations. I don't know how it happened but over the years I turned into my father. My children respect me, love me in an obligatory fashion, but they don't care for the things I cherish. They would fight over that building once I died. If I leave it to any one in particular then I don't doubt that it would be altered to be more profitable. I don't want my building to change or to be changed. I put my heart and soul into that building. It is part of my legacy.

"So yes I do want to sell it to keep it out of my children's hands but I have not been able to find a buyer that I liked. One buyer refused to meet with me and the other said he intended on renovating my building, making it more modern. It might be asking a lot but I think you may be willing to keep my building as it is. If you are not able to agree to that then I don't think I will be able to sell it to you. " He finished and gave her a long searching look.

Faith looked at Robert for a moment and then down at her plate. She hadn't seen the entire building and she hated to agree to something without knowing the whole of the situation. There could be parts of the building that were in serious need of modernization or repair. There could be serious structural faults that she was unaware of. There were plenty of if's and could be's yet Faith was reluctant to part with the opportunity of getting something she wanted. She liked the building. She liked the outside but more importantly she liked the apartments she had seen. They had a very homey feel to them. It had been clear to her as she toured the two apartments that a lot of love and care had been placed into every fixture and design of the building.

"I won't change your building if you allow me to buy it. The only changes I would make if I had to would be due to damages or structural failures. Otherwise I will keep the building, there will be no renovation or modernization. If anything needs to be repaired then I will have it restored." She said feeling as if she was granting a dying man his last wish. She supposed in a strange way she was.

"If you are amiable to the situation then Ms. Lehane then I will donate my building to your school." Robert said with a soft smile.

"I'm guessing there will be conditions to this donation." Faith said knowing there would be.

"No." Robert stated confusing Faith. "I expect that you will hold to your word. I am placing a lot of trust in you but I have faith that you will fulfill your promise. I don't expect that my building will remain unaltered for the rest of time but for at least one more lifetime it will stay the same." Robert finished with a smile.

"That is rather generous of you Mr. McClaren and beyond being slightly confused by your sudden generosity to a stranger I am grateful. I'm meeting with several lawyers tomorrow and once my incorporation papers are filed I would be happy to accept your donation." Faith said still feeling a little shell shocked.

"Wonderful I will have our arrangement drawn up with my lawyer tomorrow. Come let us move to a lighter topic of conversation." Robert said as dinner was taken away and dessert was brought out.

Faith merely nodded amazed at their turn in fortunes. For the first time in a long time she felt as if the gods were finally smiling in their favor.


	20. Chapter 20

Faith woke up with a deep sense of satisfaction. In a matter of three weeks she had found a law firm to represent them, a architect firm to design the school, and a building for them to live in while the school was being built. She still had to find a contractor but she was hoping to put that responsibility onto Xander's shoulders. The man was a construction worker and it would be good to have someone who knew the field be in charge of it. Faith's understanding was rather limited considering not many people wanted a doll that could do construction.

It had been a week filled with relative peace. She was busy in one meeting or another and the maintenance of the girls was left to someone who wasn't her. It was a relief not to have to deal with the people who had in one way or another been witness to what she had experienced. They all knew what happened but few ever said anything about it. She wasn't sure how she felt about the whole avoidance by silence. A part of her just wanted to scream it out. To yell at them all for not understanding what it was like. To yell at them for not wanting to talk about it. She felt torn on the topic and through an unspoken agreement she had decided to avoid them as much as they avoided talking about it.

Only Dawn had been willing to broach the topic but she had worked hard at avoiding the younger woman. For now she had purpose. For now she had something to drive her. For now she could pretend it had never happened. She knew the bubble would eventually pop but it wasn't today, it wasn't right now.

Getting up Faith made her way downstairs to wait for the girls. She had rented a banquet hall in one of the local restaurants for breakfast. It wasn't her ideal situation but the hotel didn't serve a respectable breakfast. She was happy to see everyone had gotten her message and the whole group was assembled and waiting for her in the lobby. Giving the group a smile of approval she made her way outside confident that everyone would follow accordingly.

The drive to the restaurant was quick and the function room was already prepared when they arrived. Faith quickly directed everyone to serve themselves and asked the staff for a bit of privacy. Once the doors were shut she surveyed the room happy to finally have some news worth giving.

"Thank you all for getting up a little earlier and coming here for breakfast. As was suggested to me before I rented a room for us to have a nice long update on current events. I know most of you are tired of living in a hotel, I know I am, so I am happy to announce that beginning next month we will be moving into apartments." Faith paused seeing a bit of confusion gracing the faces of her fellow leaders.

"When did you buy an apartment? I thought we were going to have a say on where we lived?" Anya asked clearly unsure of the recent events.

"Originally that was the plan. However, after several long discussions and contracts Mr. McClaren has generously donated his building to our school. The tenants were the only ones we reimbursed and that was for two months rent since we didn't give them much notice. The building itself has only recently been placed under our ownership since our incorporation papers have been approved. The building and its subsequent apartments will be for the older girls who will be attending college. However, for the time being it will be used to house us until the school is constructed. On that matter we have good news as well. The property for the school has been purchased and I have consulted with several architectural firms. I have chosen one and as we speak designs are being drawn. The heads of the school shall meet with the firm in two days so that you can look over the preliminary designs and discuss what you would like added to the school." Faith stopped again to look over the group. She wasn't getting the happiness she had expected. Instead the faces that looked at her only frowned lightly.

"I'm sorry but I had hoped that for this grand school you have envisioned that we would have a larger input." Giles spoke up breaking the short silence.

"You will have all the input you desire Mr. Giles." Faith replied stressing the title of mister.

"Then why have we had no say in the building we will live in or the school we will be building?" Giles continued.

"Mr. Giles I apologize for monopolizing the duties of establishing a school. Please from this point forward you are in control. Here are you bank cards and your check books. This is the address of the law firm we have hired to see to our contracts and review any pertinent paper work. This is the address and card of the architect we have hired. If you wish for a different one you are free to find a new firm and discuss new plans. The building is owned by us but under the agreement that nothing be changed for the rest of our lifetimes at least, so nothing you can do there. However, if you dislike it you are free with my blessing to find another one. Now if you will excuse me." Faith finished handing off the papers and walking out of the function room without another word. She was beyond furious. Her blood felt as if it was boiling in her veins.

Stepping out of the restaurant she walked down the streets of Cleveland with no clear destination. She knew she was overreacting but she couldn't help it. Her focus, her goal had been ripped away from her with a few choice words. In her heart she knew that Giles was merely being argumentative, that he was just trying to make a point but that he constantly choice to do it publicly had grated her last nerve. Maybe she was the fool for choosing to make the announcements so publicly. Maybe she should have chosen to speak to the heads of the school first. Maybe she shouldn't have assumed she would always be right.

The last thought struck her as the reality sunk in. She had used school as a method of avoiding the reality of her current situation. She had taken on the responsibility without consulting the others on anything. They had no choice in which law firm they went with. They had no input on which architectural firm they choose. She had taken away their choices and forced them to accept what she wanted. She knew she was in the wrong and that is what annoyed her the most. Giles was right and she was wrong. She should have taken the time to have a heart to heart with the old man. She should have seen his fears and doubts and assured him of her trustworthiness. Instead she had gone her own way leaving him suspicious and ignored. Now it had come back to bite her in the butt and instead of facing it she had merely walked away.

It had been years since she had just walked away from a situation. It was something her old self would do. She wasn't the old Faith, she wasn't a child anymore unwilling and unable to face her responsibilities. She was an adult, hell she was several adults, and she knew when she was wrong. Taking a deep breath she forced herself to turn around. Looking back at the restaurant she willed herself to move forward. She had no idea it would be so difficult but forcing herself to take the first step she walked back her head held high. She might be wrong but she wasn't ashamed.

Walking into the function room she was surprised to see the group in similar position to when she had walked out. She was sure she had spent several minutes outside, more than long enough for them to converge onto Giles and begin to talk. Instead she found the room in relative silence.

"I am sorry that was extremely immature of me." She began hoping they would understand. "I had intended this meeting to be a meeting of minds. The way things are as of right now is that the original members of the 'Scooby' gang are the schools board members. The position of headmaster has not been filled as of yet. I considered either myself or Mr. Giles. We are the only ones with a college degree after all. I have mine in education with a Master's in Education. That also brings up an important topic; your education." She said looking at the whole group. "You are all at varying levels in your education. I know my dream of a new school is a little overwhelming and that I have been rather carried away with it, but it is my lifeline at the moment. I'll be honest with all of you and say I am not dealing with Caleb very well." She stopped unsure of how much she really wanted to reveal. Looking at the group she made up her mind. They needed to know what was going on with her. If she still wanted to be their de facto leader than she had to be willing to expose herself on occasion. "I still have a hard time looking at myself for fear that the marks are still there. I still haven't found the courage to look for any scars that were left behind. I am afraid of my own body because it is proof that he raped me." She stopped amazed that she had been willing to say it in front of everyone. "He tortured me and he raped me and I am so angry and so afraid all the time. This school has been my way of avoiding it all. I am sorry I've been ignoring all of you. I am sorry that I have made it seem like your thoughts and opinions don't matter. I've needed the control and you all have had to deal with that. So now I am going to be open about what we need and we can discuss as a group what to do. If you don't like the law firm I chose we can find another one, the same goes to the architectural firm." Faith said looking at each of the Originals.

Seeing the unsure faces of the younger girls and the light blushes on the adults she decided to plow forward. "On the topic of education I don't know what level all of you are at. I don't know which ones of you would like to return to school, who wants to try for their G.E.D and who would like to move on to college. In order to run this school we will need teachers. Personally I can teach several of the basic classes. I am licensed to teach English, History, Math and Science. However, I don't want to be in charge of teaching all the classes. So I assume that either some of you will work towards getting you college degree or we will hire some civilians for help. That particular topic needs our attention sooner rather than later. Unfortunately UC Sunnydale is gone so getting a hold of any records may be next to impossible. However" She said walking towards a small stack of papers. "I have applications for all the local colleges and Universities. I feel that those of you who are able to apply to do so immediately. Tuition will be taken care of by us."

"Moving on to the topic of the school in general I want you all to have more involvement so I am relinquishing some of the responsibility solely to you. Xander if you don't mind and are willing I would like you to interview some of the local contractors and find one to build the school. You will be working directly with them every step of the way. Willow and Giles I assume would like to be in charge of dealing with our lawyers and our architects. I will work out how to break down and assign the apartments and hand them out accordingly. Each apartment can be decorated by its owner within reason and within a budget. It should only be home for the next year or so. There is still a lot to go over and a lot more work to be done once the school is built. We will have to decide who will go retrieve and recruit our students. Those who will be working towards their degree in education clearly can't be moved for the purpose of recruitment."

"What would I be doing?" Anya asked clearly wanting some responsibility.

"I heard you have a fondness for money. I created a separate account for you to use for investments. We may have money to spare but it never hurts to invest. All investment choices are yours to make." Faith replied happy that the group was actually starting to communicate.

"What about those of us who don't want to become teachers?" Colleen asked her hand raised as if she was still in school.

"Then choose what you want to do instead. I don't want us to be anything like the Council. Buffy and I were more often than not treated as property with no respect or concern for our welfare. In building this school I am hoping that we can not only train the next generation but also provide them a means of bettering their lives. Being a slayer is a overwhelming burden and I wish to lessen that burden for each slayer that has been called. I would also like Willow to start looking for a way to take back the Calling, to make girls normal again." She finished looking at Willow hopefully. "I know the drugs used for the Cruciamentum can take away the slayer but it's not permanent. I want them to have a choice once we find them." Faith finished hoping she was getting her thoughts and feelings on the topic across to Willow.

"I'll do what I can Faith but it will take some time. Most of our books are gone and starting up a new library will take time." Willow said feeling a little helpless.

"I get it and I can accept that as long as we actually try." Faith said letting silence fill the room. "I can't think of what else we need to talk about." Faith said hoping to lighten the mood and break the tension that had slowly built.

"I think we should talk about what happened. You brought it up and I think it's time we all acknowledged it." Kennedy said looking with compassion at Faith.

"Ken I don't think I can really talk about that." Faith said knowing immediately what Kennedy was referring to.

"I don't mean to be pushy but I think we should. What happened to you has effected all of us in its own way. We don't know how to treat you. We don't know how to act around you. We feel lost and I am sorry to make it all about us but we need something to go on." Kennedy said hoping Faith understood the meaning behind her words.

"Fuck Ken could you have asked for anything else? I don't think I will ever be ready to talk about everything that happened. I don't think I could ever go over the nitty gritty details. Suffice it to say that the Bringers caught me while I was walking back. There were too many of them and I was overpowered before I knew what was happening. I remember hoping they were going to kill me and I remember fearing what would happen to me when they didn't. Caleb strung me up, he raped me, and the First watched and occasionally commented in between. It was horrible to see them talking about me, discussing the possibilities. It was even worse when the First offered up ideas for the next round." Faith said stopping to take a seat and catch her breath. She suddenly felt hot, tired, and afraid. She prayed to whatever was out there that she wasn't about to go into a full panic attack.

"Who did the First look like?" Kennedy asked fearing the worst. She had recognized the voice and she had hoped it wasn't who she thought it was.

"Buffy" Faith said unable to stop the panic from setting in. Closing her eyes she focused on her breathing and cut out the world. Sliding into her own mind Faith huddled into her room. She couldn't deal with the memories that had suddenly overwhelmed her. She couldn't deal with seeing Buffy watching, a smile playing on her lips. Faith had focused on that face each time, focused and prayed that everything that was happening was nothing more than a bad dream.


	21. Chapter 21

Faith stared at the ceiling with a sense of déjà vu, she had done something very similar to this less than a month ago. Looking over her memories she saw that it was rather blank. She remembered panicking in the restaurant but nothing after that. She wasn't sure how she left the restaurant, how she got back to the hotel, or how she had gotten into bed. That left only one possibility; Echo had taken over. It was the second time it had happened and that fact was a little worrying. On a couple of occasions she had given control over to Echo but it was only now that Echo had taken control.

'_I didn't take control, you surrendered it in your own panic. This last event was a lot like after the rape. I took over because you couldn't deal with what was going on. I never take it from you though.'_ Echo whispered in her mind.

'It's odd that you can do that you know.' Faith responded grateful to Echo once again.

_ 'No what's even odder is that we are able to have this conversation. Now if you don't mind I'll give you a quick update since I have your attention. Nothing has happened, it's been four days, the group as a whole is rather disappointed that you regressed so quickly. Buffy is in mild shock and everyone is avoiding talking about your little confession. I've tried to assuage her fears and worries but I don't think I helped very much. If you are still in love with that girl you better talk to her and soon. She isn't taking being remote witness and encourager to your rape very well. Though I will admit that seeing her through all that will definitely put a dent to your future possible relationship.'_ Echo finished once again retreating into her own space.

Silently cursing Faith wished she hadn't revealed that crucial fact. She wasn't sure if there was a future with Buffy but she didn't want to destroy it again before it got a shot. She was amazed that they were even able to coexist with all the crap that had occurred between them. There was such hate, anger, and misunderstanding that Faith felt it would take years to work through everything. The worst part was that they were both rather reluctant to begin working through their issues. Now they had even more issues on top of their original issues.

"Crap" Faith finally said out loud forcing herself to get up. She had to admit she had no desire to get up, no desire to face the shit storm she knew she would have to deal with. She had revealed a lot, a lot more than she had ever intended to. She had never wanted the group to know the truth, to know anything of what had happened to her. Now it was out there in the open. She had to face it now, there was no avoiding the topic anymore.

Getting ready for the day Faith decided the first person she should be Buffy but the thought of that long convoluted conversation made her choose Giles instead. They had plenty of issues to work out and it would be enough of a challenge for her first day back; again. Walking down to the second floor she searched out Giles's room and knocked on the door. It was still rather early and she suspected he was either up and reading a book or sleeping. She would bet on the first.

After two more insistent knocks Giles opened the door. He was fully dressed and clearly put out for being interrupted. The look of surprise on his face when he saw it was Faith was both interesting and entertaining. "Echo?" He asked clearly unsure of who he was speaking to.

"Faith" She replied with a slight smile. "I think it's time we had that talk. Have you had breakfast yet?" She asked hoping to bring the conversation into a public forum. She hoped having strangers around would help her contain her own occasional bursts of anger towards the older man.

"I haven't, the girls don't wake up until much later in the day. I've learned to wait." He said as if they had been together forever.

"Well soon enough you will have your own apartment and you won't have to wait. Only two weeks left before all the apartments are cleared." Faith said glad that they were being civil. "Do you need anything or can we just go?" She asked.

"One second." Giles said before turning around and getting his key. Stepping out of the room he silently followed Faith downstairs, into the lobby, and out to the van. He wondered how to start a conversation, what topics to cover, a good way to express his feelings and opinions. He pondered away letting the silence fill the void between them.

Arriving at a small diner he had never seen before Giles stepped out of the van and looked at Faith a trace of confusion gracing his features.

"I had hoped it was here as well." She merely said answering his unasked question.

"Where else would it have been?" He asked only to shake his head knowing the answer already. Faith merely smiled at him she knew he was still having a hard time grasping everything she had gone through.

"The food is exceptional, especially breakfast." Faith said opening the door and motioning Giles in. Giles merely shook his head and entered the diner.

They were seated quickly by a friendly waitress who handed them menus and asked them what they wanted to drink. Faith ordered water and a cup of coffee. Giles ordered tea as usual. By silent agreement they avoided talking and picked out what they wanted to eat. The waitress wasn't surprised when she returned with their drinks and they were ready to order. She knew how to read people and it was clear that there was a lot of private talking to be done. She was happy to attend to her other customers and leave the pair alone.

"I'm not even sure how to start this conversation." Faith said breaking the silence.

"I think we could start on your past actions." Giles said looking at mature woman in front of him.

"The past huh? How far into the past are we going here? I don't have any intentions of telling you about my childhood Giles. Suffice it to say it wasn't pleasant and my watcher wasn't the kind of woman I would miss with any real depth. I came to Sunnydale rather traumatized from everything that had happened with Kakistos. I didn't trust you and you never gave me any reason to trust you. You were more focused on Buffy and her friends than you were on me. I will easily admit I hated and resented you for all that you refused to do for me. You never gave me the time of day and you judged me as unworthy the day you first met me." Faith stated simply.

"I suppose you are right. I did judge you and I did find you wanting. It was wrong of me. I never gave you much of a chance to prove yourself. However, your actions in Sunnydale do not lead me to trust you now. I regret what the Council did to you and I am grateful for your help but I still don't trust you." Giles said candidly, he felt that honesty would be the only way they would find some common ground.

"I don't trust you either and that is the main problem between us. Our past together is tainting our current views. I'm sorry to say this Mr. Giles but we may never like each other. However, regardless of our personal feelings we need to come to some common ground." Faith paused smiling at the waitress as she put down their food and left the check on the table with a 'take your time'. "I know without a doubt that you are uncomfortable with what was done to me. I'm a lot of different people and since you barely trust me then how in the world can you trust them? Well the reality of the matter is that we have no choice but to trust each other; at least to a certain extent." Faith paused looking over her food.

"I know I have been rather ambitious and domineering over the last couple of weeks. You now know the reason for that. I am hoping to be a little more cooperative with the group as a whole. I do want all of your opinions however, even you have to admit that a democracy can occasionally be a little tiring. I wanted to get the ball moving as quickly as possible. I'm American to the core after all. You're British, as a whole you all tend to procrastinate on your long term decisions." Faith said unable to resist the barb. "The bare facts of the matter is I only want the best for the new slayers. We thrust them into a very unsavory situation Mr. Giles. If it wasn't for the need to awaken all the Potentials for the sake of the world I never would have allowed Echo to agree to help. We changed the world in unforeseen ways. The consequences of our actions are unknown but the most important thing are those young girls and women out there. They have no idea how drastically their lives have changed and if I can make that change easier then that's what I want to do. The Council spent years hoarding money and for what? They never really helped their slayers. They kept us from the world isolated and dehumanized. Buffy has the longest lifespan in slayer terms because she has a connection with the world, with humanity. That is the ideal for all those new slayers. We need to make them feel connected." Faith said with a look of hope.

"I hate to admit it but you are not her are you?" Giles asked looking closely at the woman in front of him. Faith looked back at the older man a look of confusion marring the hope. "I've known it all along but you've just confirmed it. The Faith I knew is gone or she never existed. You are nothing like her. You are so open and expressive. You share what you are feeling. It's not a trait she really had." He said frowning slightly. "I am sorry Faith. I have been judging every action you've taken. I've questioned every move you've made all in the hope that you would make a wrong one. I've hoped to feel vindicated for not trusting you. That moment clearly isn't coming and it's time I stopped hoping. I think we can come to common ground as you so eloquently put it. We both want the same thing in the end I guess. So from now on when I feel you are going to far or not seeing far enough I'll confront you about it."

"Isn't that what you have been doing the entire time?" She asked taking a bite out of her eggs.

"I'll be doing the questioning and possible chastising in private." He corrected. "You are a grown woman and clearly more than responsible. I need to stop trying to undermine your actions in public. If I disapprove then we will discuss it in private. I agree that we should be united in our future actions." He said smiling and digging into his food. He was glad they had cleared some of the air. He knew there was still a ton he had to learn about the woman in front of him, now at least he was willing.

"So Faith tell me about this other reality?" He asked with real interest.

Faith returned his smile glad to have crossed on bridge with such ease. "Well it was different and yet so very similar. You could say it was just one alteration in history that created a completely new world. Humans were alone in that world but technology and human nature where the demons. Science can take us so far, it can change who you are and what you are. The problem was that the people in control were merely human. That sounds weird to say but it's true. I've seen such a large spectrum of human nature and we are ruled by our own wants and needs. We can't see very far into the future and that lack of vision allows us to decide without thought. The nature of humans I found was also darker than any demon." Faith paused unsure why her thoughts had led her down such a dark road. "There was also great beauty before everything changed, before the world ended. I can't help but wonder how things have changed. If the world is being rebuilt as we speak. I wonder if my family is okay." She said trailing off thinking of Pryia and Anthony. They were her closest friends and the closest she had ever come to having a real family.

"You're family?" Giles asked curious about Faith's other life.

"Yeah we weren't blood but you know better than anyone else that blood isn't nearly as important as love. We went through hell together and we came out the other side still strong, still together."

"Were they dolls like you?" He asked unsure of the term having only heard it randomly.

"Yes, but they weren't really like me." Faith paused seeing the confusion. "I don't know what made me different, what makes me different, but I keep the imprints. Pryia and Anthony were normal dolls, once they were wiped they were clean of the personalities; the people they were imprinted with. They have no memory of who they were, of what they did, what was done to them. They were lucky like that. They don't have to remember the realities of our life in the House." Faith stopped again saddened by the fact that she still remembered what her friends had gone through. She had never revealed her knowledge to them. They didn't need to be burdened by a past that wasn't really theirs.

"Do you have any good memories?" Giles asked hoping to lighten the conversation.

"I do but they aren't really mine you know? I mean every time I got married it was wonderful. That feeling of hope, of knowing without a doubt that I was marrying the person I loved most in the world. Most of them were good people, lonely people. They had so much money and power that they had lost the ability to feel connected to normal people. I was someone they could connect with, someone who loved them unconditionally. We forget how important unconditional love can be." Faith smiled softly and looked at Giles. "It wasn't always miserable but that was only when I wasn't there. I got my body back when the world went to hell. I have the ability to look through their memories to enjoy some of their joy but there was very little of it for the real me. I was oblivious on a hard drive kept in storage."

"That is a nearly impossible thought to fully comprehend. The idea of removing a person from the body and storing them in a computer is absurd. Yet even as I say that I can't help but remember some of the demons we have encountered." Giles stopped and got himself into story mode. "Did anyone ever tell you about Moloch?" He asked and smiled when she shook her head.

The rest of breakfast went on in relative peace with one story after the other entertaining the two. They parted ways in the lobby with a clear truce and a budding trust between them. Faith smiled as she watched the older man leave the lobby and go into the elevators. She was glad one conversation had gone over well. She wasn't as happy about the next conversation she mentally promised she would have. She needed to find and talk to Buffy. She supposed the group had either gone to breakfast already or would be getting ready to go out. Looking over at the clock she was surprised it was so close to noon. It was lunch time already. She hadn't realized she had spent so much time talking with Giles. Shaking away her surprised she decided to take the stairs to the third floor. Searching out Buffy's room she knocked lightly hoping to chicken out at the last moment. Instead the door opened to the older slayer.

Without asking Buffy opened her door wider and waited for Faith to enter the room. "I'm glad you're back Faith." She said closing the door and moving to the bed to take a seat. Faith chose the desk chair unwilling to sit on the bed.

"How did you know?" She asked confused as to how Buffy could tell the difference.

"I'm not sure really. I think I've just been around the two of you long enough to tell the difference." Buffy paused unsure of what to say.

"This is a lot harder than I thought it would be." Faith said breaking the silence that had swallowed them.

"Yeah it is. I just...I don't know what to say Faith. I mean what happened to you..." Buffy stopped again unable to continue.

"About that...I know what I said must have been really hard to hear." Faith said looking at the woman on the bed with sadness. Watching Buffy nod Faith continued. "I know it wasn't you. I know the First was just using your image but it was difficult to see and comforting in a creepy way. It gave me someone to focus on. I tried not to hear what it said just focus on something that wasn't Caleb and what was happening." Faith said hoping to give the event a lighter image than the reality had been.

"As if things weren't already stacked against us." Buffy said under her breath.

"What?" Faith asked barely catching Buffy's words.

"It's just I had hoped we would be able to start over once the chaos had ended. I figured we would win the war, we would take a vacation, and we would all recoup a little before returning to reality." Buffy said wistfully.

"Yeah that didn't work out did it?" Faith said still unwilling to move onto more serious topics.

"No, we fell right back into reality with no break in sight."

"This has been something of a break. I mean none of us have been slaying since we got here." Faith said happy for the light chatter.

"You haven't. I've taken the girls out a couple of times. They need the experience and patrolling in the city is different from trolling the cemeteries of Sunnydale. It's been something of a reality check for me too."

"When did you take the girls out?" Faith said happily surprised that Buffy was taking a sincere interest in the girls.

"Every weekend since we've been here. I figured they could do a bit of patrolling and then do a bit of relaxing at some of the local clubs." Buffy said smiling at the surprised look on Faith's face.

"You took the girls clubbing?" Faith asked with feigned indignation.

"Yes with extra supervision from Willow, Xander, and Anya."

"I see." Faith said her smile wilting. She was surprised to feel hurt that she had been excluded. She knew it wasn't intentional. She knew if anything it was her own fault but it didn't stop the sting of rejection.

Buffy saw Faith's face change and immediately knew she had fucked up in revealing so much. She knew what Faith was thinking and she felt guilty. It was so much like their past. She had taken the girls out, she had taken them clubbing, and she hadn't told or invited Faith. Buffy couldn't help but wonder if they would always be stuck in this eternal loop of unintentionally hurting each other. "I'm sorry." Buffy said knowing that it wouldn't change anything.

"It's okay, it's my own fault really. I've been rather wrapped up in the school." Faith paused knowing it would be faster just to be blunt. It would hurt but it would be over quickly. "I'm angry at you for taking them out and not thinking to include me." Faith said with honest anger. "I hate the fact that you have always kept me on the fringe. I know in this case in this instance that it was my own doing but in the past it wasn't. In the past you willfully kept me at bay. I wanted you to know me, to know the real me so desperately when we were in Sunnydale. I wanted your attention. I wanted your affection and the only thing I got from you was distrust. You gave me a glimpse of your life and when I killed Allen you shut me out. I had never meant to kill Allen. I know I said I didn't care but I swear I died a little as I watched him die. I hate what I became when I was with you Buffy." Faith said looking at the startled and hurt woman in front of her. "I know this might be hard to hear but I fell in love with you when I was first in Sunnydale and you know what they say about a woman scorned. I wanted to hurt you for all the hurt you so easily inflicted upon me. I know now that it was stupid of me. I know now that you were just as young and foolish as I was. I shouldn't have expected so much from you." Faith stopped amazed that she had revealed so much so easily.

"Do you still love me?" Buffy asked avoiding the whole of the rant.

"God that is a loaded question if I've ever heard one." Faith said releasing a breath of pent up frustration. "I don't know Buffy. So much has happened and we have literally been worlds apart. I have lived so much longer than you now. I've fought a war that didn't last a couple of months or a year but years of my life. I have killed more people than I can count. Their faces don't even stick out to me anymore. I've experienced so many forms of love. I have loved as so many different people and been loved in return. I have lost and I have grieved and I have mourned. I am not the same girl that you once new. I'm damaged but on a completely different level now. I'm more than just the abused little girl from a broken home." Faith paused shifting her gaze away from the woman in front of her and looked out the window. She wasn't sure what else to say or how to say it. She had avoided examining her feeling for Buffy. It had been easier when they were realities apart. Not seeing Buffy made it effortless to forget Buffy. Now being around the other woman so often her emotions had been overwhelmed.

Faith knew she wasn't fully over Paul. Though the man had been more Echo's lover than hers he had still been an important person their life. She also knew without a doubt that she wasn't ready to get into a relationship let alone start moving towards one. She didn't know if she still loved Buffy. Turning to look at said object of affection Faith felt that little extra beat and knew that she was delusional if she ever thought she was over Buffy. No, her body knew it, even if her mind occasionally repressed it, that she was in love with Buffy Summers.

"Yes." She finally said feeling hopeless. "I'm still in love with you. I have loved you from the moment I first saw you. I think I will always love you." A deep sadness tingeing her voice Faith looked at the woman in front of her and wished things were different. "I returned to Sunnydale because of you. The thought that you could be in danger was enough to compel me. I should have just walked away and started my life over." She said shaking her head. "Why do you want to know if I still love you Buffy?" She finally asked feeling a need to understand how their conversation had changed so drastically.

Buffy stared at Faith shocked by everything she had heard. Her mind and emotions felt awhirl in confusion. Part of her jumped with glee at the idea that Faith still loved her. Another part wondered what future they could have together. Yet another part wondered and worried that they could never be together. Buffy's emotions regarding Faith were confused at best. She knew she was in love with Faith, well she suspected she was in love with Faith. She wasn't really sure on how to love someone you barely knew and if she was honest she didn't know Faith. She barely knew the old Faith and this new mature Faith was still a stranger. Yet it didn't stop her body from reacting at the sight of Faith. It didn't stop her heart from skipping a beat. It didn't stop the jealousy of seeing Faith be so easy with Dawn. It didn't stop her from wanting desperately to be around Faith.

"Buffy? Why did you want to know?" Faith asked breaking into Buffy's thoughts.

"I...I" Buffy stopped thinking of how to phrase her thoughts. She wasn't sure she wanted to be as open and honest as Faith had been. "I never knew how much you meant to me until you were gone. Even then I didn't fully realize it. When you were taken I didn't notice. It took so long for me to notice. I was glad that you were out of my life." Buffy blew out a breath filled with repressed aggravation. "You made my life so complicated, so intense. The things I felt for you I had never felt before. I was constantly confused and pushing you away was easier than dealing with you. I'm sorry to say this...ashamed even but when you killed Allen I was almost grateful. You gave me a way to push you away and not feel guilty about it. Then you kept trying to hurt me and hating you became even easier. After the rooftop, after you helped us defeat the Mayor I started to feel it." She stopped.

"I think you need to go on." Faith said needing to know Buffy's thoughts.

"When you left...when they took you I knew. I felt a sensation of loss that I couldn't explain. It was like a piece of me was suddenly gone. I didn't realize how much not having you around hurt until you were suddenly back. It was like the reason I was a slayer suddenly had meaning again. Seeing you sitting on that headstone I felt my heart skip and beat and smile with joy. I wasn't sure how to deal with you, I'm still not sure how to treat you or act around you. I'm four years older but I still feel like a confused teenager around you." She stopped again looking down at her lap. "When you were taken I felt as if my world had come to a shattering halt. I knew something terrible was going to happen. I worried that you would be killed or worse. The fact that it was worse hurts me every day. The idea that you had to see me while he raped you tears me up inside. The fact that the First used my image to encourage that monster..." Buffy stopped unable to go any further.

Faith moved onto the bed hesitant on how to comfort Buffy. "I'm sorry." Buffy said covering her face and breathing deeply. She didn't want to lose control in front of Faith. "I have no right to ask for comfort when none of it is your fault." Buffy said wiping her eyes in a futile attempt to stop the tears before they started.

Laying her hand on Buffy's shoulder Faith let it rest there lightly. A part of her wanted to hold Buffy, to offer the comfort the woman so obviously needed. Another part of her though was afraid of what would happen. She wasn't ready for a relationship. She wasn't ready to deal with all the emotions and complications of taking a lover. She especially wasn't sure how she would deal with being physically touched in such an intimate setting. Their past was nothing to go by in a way of finding or giving comfort. It also wasn't a very good record of proof that Buffy wouldn't end up hurting her again.

"I'm okay really I am." Buffy said wiping her face once more and giving Faith a watery smile.

Getting up Faith put a little distance between them. "I don't think this is anywhere close to where I expected this conversation to go. I'm not sure what you expect from me Buffy or what you would want but I don't think I can give it to you. There is so much between us that we haven't talked about, that we haven't resolved." Faith said looking at the woman before taking a couple of steps away from her and away from the bed. Turning around she walked back to the desk chair resolved to keep talking.

"I'm not asking for more, not yet at least." Buffy said softly uncertain of Faith's reaction. "I know we have a lot to work through and I know things may never progress with us but I was hoping we could try. I care about you. I love you." Buffy said shocked at her own revelation.

Faith stared at Buffy with a blank face unwilling to show her own shock. She didn't know what to say, how to react to such a statement.

"Please don't feel pressured by that. I don't want my confession to push you into doing anything you are not ready for. If you are willing to give us a chance I would like us to try being friends and if possible maybe something more." Buffy said unable to hide the hope from her voice.

Faith continued to stare at Buffy shocked. She really hadn't expected the conversation to turn in this particular direction. "I'll have to think about it Buffy. You know I'm going through a lot right now. I don't think I'm in a good place to start a committed relationship." Faith stopped again watching Buffy's eyes become shuttered. "I'm not saying no to starting over though. I agree that we have something. I agree that it could be something wonderful but it might just not be the right time. We seem to have an issue with timing." Faith said thinking back on their first meeting. "Let's start with friendship, let's get to know each other for real this time." Faith said a bit of hope lightening her heart.

"I'll take that." Buffy said letting a smile sneak through.


	22. Chapter 22

Looking over the property Faith was surprised at how much they had already achieved. The foundation of the main buildings were being laid. The cost was astronomical but worth it. The designs showed the school as a mix of old with new. The general look of the building would be chateauesque with influences of gothic and French renaissance. The interior of the building would have wood paneling and open space for the common rooms. The classrooms would have a mix of modern technology with the warmth that came from wood floors and large windows. The dormitories would be separate building from the educational buildings with homey common rooms and a gym in the basement.

The staff would be housed within the dormitories with the students. The third floor of the dorms would be allocated to staff. Those rooms were designed as small apartments. The school would have two dormitories. One for the younger girls ages 10 to 15 and one for the older girls ages 16 to 18. Everyone had a say on how the dormitories were designed and the Original Scooby gang had a lot of say in the outlay of the apartments. It had been chaotic and Faith was grateful she wasn't an architect.

She couldn't help but smile at the realities of money. If you had enough of it people were more than willing to bow down and do you bidding. She knew that if it wasn't for the amount of blunt they had put forward and the knowledge that much more was available they would still be months away from breaking ground. Instead the designs for the main buildings were done and only the gymnasium and dormitories remained. The ground breaking had been over a week ago and now the foundation was being laid. Money made life and business a lot easier.

Lying back on the picnic blanket Faith closed her eyes and looked up towards the sun. It was already mid-August and school would be starting soon. She was amazed at how quickly time had passed and at how much had gotten done. She had had to forge papers for Willow and Buffy for them to get into Cleveland University but they had gotten in. Buffy intended to study psychology and Willow intended to study Education with a concentration in science and mathematics. Faith was beyond grateful that she would have at least one other member of the gang to help her teach. Kennedy had also gotten into the University and Faith hoped she would go into education though at the moment she was still undecided. Xander had no desire to return to school, instead he was taking a few woodworking classes at the technical school. Giles was slowly gathering a new library. The rest of the new slayers were enrolled at the local high school. It wasn't ideal and Faith considered home schooling them but she knew it would take up more time than she had to spare.

"Faith what are you thinking about?" Willow asked as she looked over the construction site in the distance.

Faith smiled happy at the change in her relationship with the group. She still wasn't great, she still had nightmares, she was still afraid of looking too closely at her own body but she had gotten better and interacting with the group. She had let everyone have a voice and encouraged everyone to be involved. She knew that these new girls would be the foundation of the school and she needed to encourage them to fulfill their potential.

"I was just reveling over everything that has happened." Faith said vaguely.

"So happy thoughts?" Dawn asked popping a strawberry into her mouth.

"Overall yes" Faith said turning on her side and looking at the group. Kennedy had suggested they look over the school today and Chao-Ahn had suggested they have a picnic. In the end they had combined the two. Now after gorging on fruit, cheese, and meat everyone was either exploring the grounds or lying in the sun like lazy alligators. Faith felt a bit like an alligator, bloated and happy luxuriating in the warm sun. "How about you Willow?" She asked figuring it was only polite.

"I'm just impressed at how much work they have already gotten done." Willow said turning to Buffy who was staring at Faith. Nudging Buffy, Willow wiggled her eyes. Laughing softly at the instant blush that blossomed on Buffy's cheeks Willow knew where Buffy's mind had wandered to. She had to admit that Faith looked delicious. She didn't know why but Faith was glowing. She had gained a bit of weight and it had gone to all the right places. She looked lush and soft and now Willow's mind had wandered into the gutter. Unable to stop herself from blushing profusely Willow looked away from Faith.

"I'm glad I'm not the only one." Buffy whispered seeing the blush and intense look of desire flash across Willows face.

"Glad you not the only what?" Dawn asked oblivious to the two older women.

"Nothing Dawn." Buffy said unwilling to share her thoughts with her sister. She hadn't gotten very far with Faith and she had to admit that she was getting a little randy. She felt like a teenage boy and it was embarrassing to say the least. She had never lusted after a woman and lusting after Faith was a relatively new experience. She didn't consider herself gay per say more like gay for Faith.

"Faith? What do you think they are whispering about?" Dawn asked teasingly more than able to see what her sister was thinking about.

"I'm sure I have no idea Dawn." Faith said turning onto her back with a smile.

"Hmm I think they were whispering about you Fai." Dawn continued with a smirk.

"I doubt it, not much about me that's interesting." Faith replied disinterested.

"I think they are wondering when you gained so much weight." Dawn said with mock seriousness.

Sitting up Faith looked at Dawn in shock. Looking down at her own body Faith had to admit she had gained a little weight but it was barely noticeable. "Are you calling me fat?" She asked outraged. "I am not fat. I mean look at me." She said standing up and showing off her body.

Willow couldn't help but look and the instant blush gave way to her thoughts. Buffy was in the same place and didn't bother to hide her open admiration. Dawn merely smiled at the two lusted filled woman and laughed.

"Now there is no need to laugh Dawn. I may have gained a couple of pounds I'll admit but it's not like we've been doing any heavy training. I haven't even gone slaying since we got here." Faith said and stopped. Her mind hit a wall and she knew what was behind that wall wouldn't be good. Closing her eyes she tried to stop the sudden panic that washed over her.

"Faith? Are you okay?" Dawn asked seeing Faith suddenly become pale.

Shaking her head Faith tried to sit down and plopped down ungracefully. "What is it Faith?" Dawn asked fear tingeing her voice at Faith's sudden change.

Faith didn't respond she just kept shaking her head. In her mind she tried to reason it all out. She tried to find a valid explanation for all the little things she had been ignoring. Yet the only reasonable explanation was one she didn't want to face. She didn't want to be. She couldn't be. Yet she knew she could.

Breathing deeply Faith tried to stop the panic, stop the reality from overwhelming her. Putting her head between her knees Faith opened her eyes and stared at the blanket underneath her. She closely studied the pattern and ignored the voices of the people around her. She needed something to focus on, something to take her away just long enough for the panic to stop. Taking several more deep breaths she looked up at the construction site. She looked at everything she was working for and her mind came to another stop. Everything was changing, everything had changed.

"Faith are you okay?" Faith heard Buffy off to her side and a part of her wanted to cry. They were finally starting over. They actually now had a shot at being friends. Late nights going over designs for their separate apartments had led to long talks about the past. Buffy had told her everything that had happened since Faith was taken away. Faith in turn had revealed the lives she had lived. They had bonded and even though there was a world of things to go over they had finally found some common ground. Now Faith wasn't sure they would ever have a future. She had dreamed of more. She had seen the looks Buffy had given her, had read the lust gleaming in her counterparts eyes and had reacted. At first she had been afraid of her own reactions but now she felt almost comfortable. Now she knew she could be with someone some day without panicking. Now she dreamed of a life with Buffy once more. Now like always that dream was falling apart.

"It's nothing I'm sorry. I have to go." Faith said getting up. She was unwilling to share her thoughts with the others. They had all become so close but without confirmation she wasn't willing to share this particular life altering event. Especially since it was an event she was afraid of.

"Should one of us follow her?" Willow asked with obvious concern.

"I don't think so. Whatever we said, whatever we made her think of clearly scared her. She deals with things better on her own. She knows to come to us now when she feels the need or needs help." Dawn said staring at Faith's retreating form. She had an idea of what had triggered Faith's panic. She hated that she instantly thought of it but what she hated most was that it was probably true. Releasing a sigh she turned to the others and tried to change the conversation topic. "So Buffy have you picked out your classes already?"

"Yeah I did. I just wish I wasn't a sophomore. I would much rather be a senior." Buffy said unable to tear her gaze away from the speck that was Faith.

"Then you should have had Faith make you one." Willow said with a smile knowing Buffy would never do that. They had enough qualms accepting Faith's documents as it was.

"Yeah I wish I did. The idea of going to school for the next three years is about as appealing as fighting a slime demon, in a sewer."

"Well that's what you get for dropping out of school." Willow said in a teasing sing song.

"Hey!" Buffy said with mild outrage.

"So what are you taking this semester anyways?" Dawn asked bringing the conversation back on point.

"For my literature sequence I picked short stories. I have to take business statistics for my major, then social psychology, a biology class with a lab, and ending off with African studies." Buffy said turning towards Willow. "How about you?"

"Thankfully they accepted most of my credits so I'm considered a junior. The fact that I am effectively switching my major however doesn't really help. So really I'm just a sophomore again." She said with a soft sigh. "I've signed up for Teaching as a profession, Secondary Mathematics Instruction and Assessment, Secondary Science Instruction and Assessment, and Childhood Psychology. It's one of those times when I wish I could go back in time and change my major. Looking at all the classes I have to take I think I'll be in school for another three years. Though if the summer courses line up right I'll take some of those to hurry everything up." Willow said with a small put upon sigh.

"I thought you would be more excited about going back to school?" Dawn asked lying down and closing her eyes.

"I am but I'm not. I just always thought I would be working on my master's right now, not still working on my bachelors." Willow frowned lightly. "How bout you Dawnie are you excited about going to a new school?"

"Oh I'm just thrilled." Dawn dripped with sarcasm. "I get to start in a new school in, in a new town, and in a new state. Yup I am beyond excited."

"Well at least most of the other girls will be joining you." Willow said hoping to cheer up the younger woman.

"Silver lining I suppose." Dawn said thinking no such thing. She wanted High School to be over and done with. She wanted to start College but more than anything she wanted to start working towards becoming a Watcher. There were few Watcher's out there now so going to Watcher school was out of the question. All that was left to her was apprenticing herself to Giles.

"So how do you like the new apartment?" Willow asked feeling that Dawn was a little despondent on the topic of school.

"It's nice, it's different." Dawn said not feeling a real need to expound on the topic. Her mind had wandered back to Faith.

"I like it." Buffy chirped in. "I have to admit Faith has great taste. The only thing I dread now is moving all the furniture we bought into the new apartment once the dormitories are built." She said with a little shudder.

"You're a slayer give me a break. It's puny little humans like me who have to dread moving day." Willow said giving Buffy a nudge.

"Yes because all humans can levitate furniture." Buffy said seriously.

"Fine I'll give you that but you know I don't do magic unless it's needed." Willow admitted.

"On the topic of magic have you gotten anything on the spell you cast and how to reverse it?" Dawn piped in.

"Uh not really no, honestly I'm still surprised it worked. I've gone over the spell several times and I think..." She paused "Well this is just conjecture but I think I could use the Scythe and Faith to reverse the Calling." Willow said looking over at Dawn.

"Why Faith? Why not just the Scythe?" Buffy asks confused.

"Because Faith is part of the Scythe." Willow said matter of fact.

"So am I. So is every slayer called." Buffy stated hoping for a better explanation.

"Yes but you don't hold the Slayer's line, and neither do any of the new slayers. They are part of the line but the magic, for lack of a better word, that is the line is still within Faith. Until she dies the line can't be passed and if it is passed at this moment I am not even sure who would be called. I know Kennedy was next in line but I don't know if the power, the magic will go to her. You and Faith are different from the others. You are Original in every sense of the word. All those girls that were called are an extension of Faith and her power." Willow said working on the theory that had been wandering through her mind over the last couple of weeks.

"I don't get it." Buffy said clearly baffled. "Does that mean that Faith is an extension of my power?"

"No, you actually died. The power and the line left you and entered Kendra and then Faith. It is complicated and honestly it is still just a theory of mine. I mean we could test it out but that involves finding one of the girls who wants to return back to normal. The Scythe is tapped into all the slayers in the world but Faith is the conduit. She was the connection I needed. I pulled the essence of all slayers past through Faith and into the Scythe to activate all of the potentials." Willow said trying to explain the unexplainable nature of magic.

"That sounds painful." Dawn said without opening her eyes.

"I honestly wasn't with it enough to know. You would have to ask Faith." Willow said wondering for the first time if the spell had hurt Faith.

"So do you think that is how Caleb planned on ending the line?" Dawn asked with curiosity.

"What? How?" Willow asked feeling a little lost in the sudden change in topics.

"By getting her to turn evil so she would pull the scythe out of the stone and then using it to kill her." Dawn said simply.

"I think I'm still missing a key piece in all of this." Buffy said looking towards her sister for explanation.

"If the Scythe is part of the slayer and the line is in Faith then wouldn't the easiest way to end the line would be to kill Faith with the Scythe. It would be like killing yourself with your own hand." Dawn shook her head wondering why no one else had followed that tangent.

"I don't know." Willow stated simply her mind stuck on the possibility of the Slayer line being destroyed so easily. "If that's true it's no wonder the Scythe was hidden away for so long." She became silent her mind lost in the implications of everything they had spoken about.


	23. Chapter 23

"So Ms. Lehane I see here you think you may be pregnant. Do you want a blood test to confirm or are you thinking of a sonogram?" The young doctor said walking into the examination room eyes glued to the chart in front of her.

Faith looked up at the young woman in front of her and couldn't help but think she was too young to be a doctor. Faith had chosen this particular medical group because they were all women and most of them rather mature. The woman in front of her only met one of her criterion. Faith had chosen Dr. Minaker to be her Gynecologist but Dr. Minaker was on vacation and if she wanted to be seen she needed to see the young doctor in front of her; Dr. Lauren Denise.

"I'm pretty positive." Faith said softly feeling a little lost.

"Okay how positive is positive? Did you take a home pregnancy test and it was positive?" Dr. Denise asked gently. It was obvious something was upsetting the woman in front of her. She suspected if the woman was pregnant that it was an unwanted pregnancy.

"I haven't had my period in three months." Faith stated simply admitting something she had avoided noticing.

"That's pretty positive unless you have an irregular menstrual cycle."

"I'm like a clock." Faith said looking at the doctor with all seriousness.

"In that case I think we can skip the blood test and go straight to the physical examination." Dr. Denise said taking out a Johnny and laying it on the table for Faith. "I'll give you a minute to change." Dr. Denise said while stepping out of the room.

Faith stared at the Johnny for a minute before getting up and removing her clothes. Folding them up in a neat pile she set them down on her chair and put on the gown. "I'm ready." She said aloud hoping the doctor would hear her and that they could get everything over with.

"Alright Ms. Lehane"

"Please call me Faith." Faith interrupted.

"Alright Faith would you  
please lay down on the examination table and place your feet into the stirrups. Since you're mostly positive that you are pregnant we are going to do a transvaginal sonogram. Now it may be a little embarrassing but it involves inserting a wand into your vagina, it stops at the cervix. This will allow us to have a better image of the fetus and hopefully be able to tell you how far along you are and if there are any developmental concerns." Dr. Denise said moving the machine over into Faith's line of sight. Patiently she waited for Faith to position herself on the table. Lubricating the wand Dr. Denise inserted it slowly into Faith's vaginal canal stopping at the cervix. Moving the wand slightly she looked at the monitor examining the uterus. Finding the fetus she smiled softly.

"Well Faith it looks like you were right." She said turning on the sound for Faith to hear the rapid heartbeat. "That's your baby's heart." Moving the monitor she pointed out the head and feet. "It looks like you are definitely around 12 to 14 weeks along. We can switch to an abdominal ultrasound and take a few pictures."

Faith merely nodded her head. She didn't reply as the wand was removed, or the monitor was turned off, even when the doctor laid a sheet across her legs and pulled up the gown. Instead she stared at the ceiling trying to grasp everything she had just seen and heard. She was pregnant.

"Alright Faith now here's a much better picture." Dr. Denise said moving the ultrasound wand over Faith's abdomen. "Everything looks great. Here's the head, the feet, the spine, eyes, hands." Dr. Denise said as she pointed out each feature. Have you been experiencing any nausea, vomiting, bleeding, fluctuations in mood?" She asked wondering why it took her patient so long to realize she was pregnant.

"Not really, I've been a little more tired than usual but I attributed it to the fact that I've been so busy. No vomiting or nausea and if there had been bleeding I don't think I would even be here." Faith said surprised at how willfully ignorant she had been. She had a mother and nurse inside her mind and she didn't see the signs for what they were. "Do you guys perform abortions?" She asked suddenly.

Dr. Denise stopped taking pictures of the fetus and looked briefly at her patient. "Yes, we are a pro choice group though we don't particularly advertise it. If that is what you would like to do Ms. Lehane then you have to decide sooner rather than later. Ohio state law states that abortions can only be performed until around 24 weeks when the child is viable." Dr. Denise stopped and wiped Faith's stomach clean, printed out the pictures and turned off the monitor.

"Who would be doing the procedure?" Faith asked softly pulling down the gown.

"I would." Dr. Denise said just as softly. "Dr. Minaker and Dr. Whittaker are gynecologists, I'm an obstetrician gynecologist and so is Dr. Formache."

"So you would be handling either my abortion or my pregnancy?" Faith asked looking at Dr. Denise.

"I can do either or you can choose Dr. Formache for just your pregnancy." Dr. Denise stated simply.

"I'm guessing that Dr. Formache doesn't do abortions. Why do you?" Faith asked curiously.

"I've always believed a woman has the right to choose what happens with and in her body. There are a variety of reasons for why a woman would want an abortion and I try not to judge any of them for any of those reasons. If you want to talk about the procedure or if you want to talk about why you want an abortion I am willing to listen."Dr. Denise said.

Sitting up Faith looked at the young woman in front of her a smiled slightly. "I don't know what I want to do. I don't think I can have this baby."

"Why can't you have this baby?" Dr. Denise asked reasonably.

"Because I'm not sure who the father is. If the baby is fourteen weeks then the father is a man I loved. If the baby is twelve weeks old than the father is a man who...hurt me." Faith said avoiding the doctors eyes. She avoided pointing out that she suspected that if it was Caleb's child then it would undoubtedly be evil.

"I see. Would you like to do a paternity test?" Dr. Denise asked seriously.

"I can't I don't have anything for you to test it against. The man I love is dead and so is the man who hurt me. They've both been cremated." She lied seeing that there was no way to get a D.N.A sample from Paul or Caleb.

"That does make the situation harder doesn't it. Faith" Dr. Denise paused thinking what else she could say. "I can't tell you what to do, nor would I. It is your body and you who will have to decide what happens. I am here to listen but there is very little advice that I could offer."

"I assumed as much. I know my options, now it's more of an issue figuring out what to do next." Faith said feeling tears rush to the surface.

Dr. Denise handed her a box of tissues and waited for Faith to get herself together again. "Let's schedule an appointment for two weeks from now. You don't have to decide what to do by then but until you do decide I want to monitor your pregnancy. We will also take some blood and do a couple of tests to make sure everything is okay with the baby." She said deciding at the moment to put off all the other tests that needed to be done until the next visit. It was clear Faith was undecided on what to do and she had no desire to pressure Faith. "We will have to do a more thorough vaginal exam next time as well." She finished feeling it was better to warn Faith ahead of time. "Here are some pamphlets on abortion and some on prenatal care." She said remembering the literature that Faith might want to help her in her decision making.

Nodding her head Faith picked up the pamphlets and thanked the doctor. Waiting for the Dr. Denise to leave Faith took off the gown and got dressed. She wasn't sure what she felt at the moment but she was sure she wasn't going to like how she would feel.

Stepping out into the lobby she walked to the receptionist, scheduled her next appointment and left the office. Walking out of the building to her new car she shook her head in a vain attempt to clear it. She had too many thoughts rolling around her head and too any emotions clawing to the surface. Getting into the car she drove in a daze to the apartment building. So much had changed in the last few months. The tenants had moved out quickly and the group had moved in. Faith had chosen a single bedroom apartment for herself. Buffy had roomed with Dawn. Giles had a single as did Kennedy with Willow. Xander had cleared the air with Anya and they had agreed to give their relationship another try. Faith had expected them to live together but was surprised when they each picked a single room apartment. The rest of the girls got a single for the time being.

Entering her apartment Faith wasn't surprised to see Dawn sitting on the couch with a book and a cup of coffee. The younger woman was the only other person who had a key to her apartment. Faith found their relationship a little strange but comforting. She hadn't expected to be able to become friends with a woman so much younger than herself. There was a disparity of nine years between them. Yet they had bonded much to Faith own personal surprise. Dawn was rather mature for her age and it helped that the young woman was so willing to listen without judgment. It seemed that their first meeting was merely a bit of pent up aggression and hurt rushing to the surface.

"Are you?" Dawn asked simply putting down her book and looking at Faith.

Faith released a sigh shut the door and made her way to the couch. Nodding she took a seat and asked the obvious. "How did you know?"

"I didn't really, I didn't suspect if that is what you are asking. I just put the pieces together from your behavior at the picnic. Do you know what you are going to do?" Dawn asked her voice free of condemnation.

"No" Faith said unsure what else there was to say, how else to phase everything she was feeling.

"Are you going to tell the others?" Dawn asked wondering specifically if Faith was going to tell Buffy.

"No, not until I know what I am going to do." Faith said knowing she wouldn't be able to make a decision with everything putting in their opinion and their judgments.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Dawn asked knowing that sometimes Faith needed a soundboard to make a decision.

"I don't know if I am ready to decide what to do. I have another ten weeks to decide whether or not to have an abortion, though I suspect it would be better to decide before I get too close to the deadline." Faith stated looking at the blank television.

"So you are thinking of having an abortion?" Dawn asked keeping her voice as toneless as possible.

"I...I am considering it." Faith said unwilling to expound on her thoughts.

"Well you know whatever you decide to do I am here for you." Dawn stated plainly.

"I know."

Laying her hand lightly on Faith's shoulder Dawn got up and put her cup into the sink. Nodding at Faith she walked out of the apartment knowing that Faith needed to be alone more than she needed company.

Watching Dawn leave Faith couldn't help but wish the younger woman had stayed. She would rather have a distraction than have to deal with her own thoughts and emotions. Looking down at her stomach she couldn't help the tears that suddenly rose. Laying down on the couch she wrapped her arms around her abdomen and cried. She wanted her baby. She hated to admit it but she wanted the life that was slowly growing inside of her. She wanted more than death and blood and pain that had been her life so far. She had memories of being a mother. She remembered the sheer love that flowed through her when she looked at her son. As she breastfed that beautiful boy who she loved with all of her being, her beautiful Jack. It didn't matter that she wasn't his real mother, or that the memories in her mind weren't her own, she had still loved that baby. She wanted that feeling again. The idea of destroying the life that grew inside her tore her apart.

Yet a part of her wasn't sure she would be able to deal with having this baby. She didn't know who the father was but she was more than sure that it was Caleb's. Could she have the child of the man who raped and tortured her? Would she be able to love that child? Those were the questions that plagued her. Could she actually ignore the half of her child that was its father? Could she see past that? Would she be able to look at her child and see only her child? Or would she looked into the eyes of her child and see Caleb? She didn't know. She just didn't know if she could do that.

Another part of her considered giving the baby up for adoption. It was an option and a reasonable one. That part of her also couldn't deal with losing the baby she had carried for nine months. Couldn't give up the being she had felt kick and move. She couldn't bare the idea of never knowing what happened to her child. It was painful. All of her thoughts were painful and each one lead to another bought of crying.

Feeling drained and exhausted Faith got up off the couch and made her way to her bedroom. There was no way she would be able to decide what to do so quickly. She needed to sleep. She needed to consider what she wanted and what she could deal with. The knock on the door made her turn around before reaching the bed. She considered opening the door. She knew who was on the other side without thinking. She could feel the slight tug in her belly that told her it was the only other person like her.

Wiping her eyes Faith walked back to the front door and opened it slightly. "Hey Buffy" She said once the door was open a crack.

"Faith? Are you okay?" Buffy asked seeing Faith's red nose and puffy eyes.

"I'm fine Buffy I'm just having a hard day." Faith said as if that explained everything and in a way it did. She had, had several bad days since she had opened up to the group and relinquished some control. She had mood swings and crying days and angry days and days where she didn't want to see anyone. It had been a slight emotional rollercoaster but everyone had taken it all in stride. They all tried to be understanding and accepting of what she was going through. Now she wondered how much of that rollercoaster was because of the rape or because of the pregnancy.

"Do you want to talk?" Buffy asked unsure of how to help.

"No but I do want to take a nap." Seeing Buffy's face drop a little she continued without thinking. "Do you want to join me?"Faith asked wondering after the words were out of her mouth where they came from. Clearly her sense of logic had taken a vacation.

Nodding Buffy stepped into the room and silently followed Faith to the bedroom. She had no idea what had prompted Faith to invite her to a nap but she wasn't going to skip out on an opportunity to get closer to Faith. Entering the bedroom Buffy took off her shoes and waited for Faith to pick a side and get into bed.

Sliding under the sheets Faith scooted over and held the sheets up in welcome. She wasn't sure what she was doing or what she was encouraging but she wasn't going to regret it. At least not yet. She smiled when Buffy slid in without hesitation and turned on her side so Faith was spooning her. Letting her arm drape over Buffy's abdomen Faith let her head rest on the pillow and closed her eyes breathing in Buffy's scent. She felt a little calmer lying next to Buffy. Her mind cleared a bit and her emotions settled down. She marveled that Buffy could have such a sudden calming effect on her.

"Are you comfortable?" Faith asked feeling Buffy snuggle in closer.

"Very" Buffy stated luxuriating in the feel of being wrapped around Faith.

"How did you know?" Faith asked softly not sure if Buffy had fallen asleep.

"How did I know what?" Buffy asked just as softly.

"That I needed...comfort." Faith finished not able to find a better word.

"I don't know. I just had a sudden urge to check in on you is all." Buffy said unable to really explain that feeling.

"Thank you. I've been feeling really lost and confused today." Faith said giving Buffy a slight squeeze.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Buffy asked hoping to get Faith to open up a little more.

"Not yet." Faith said shaking her head slightly. "Would you like to talk about something else?" Faith asked hoping not to disappoint Buffy.

Buffy thought about those words. There were plenty of things she wanted to talk about with Faith. There were plenty of things she wanted to ask but most of them she was shy or afraid to ask. Their relationship, friendship really was still very fragile and she was loath to put it at risk. "What are you're dreams Faith?" She asked hoping she was being vague enough to start a random conversation.

"My dreams? I don't know anymore. I dreamed of surviving each night when I was here. I dreamed of saving the world when I was there." She said knowing Buffy knew which world she was speaking about. "Now, now I dream of building a school and helping all those girls whose lives we have changed."

"What about personal dreams?" Buffy asked hoping to lead Faith into talking about a future for them.

"I don't dream too far in that department." Faith said thinking of the baby growing inside of her. "A part of me dreams of the white picket fence and the kids. A part of me yearns for a life filled with love and happiness." She blurted out unable to stop the hope filling her voice.

"Do you think we could ever have that?" Buffy asked unable to hide the double meaning of her words.

"I don't know." Faith barely whispers feeling the tears rise to the surface at everything she might lose.

"Faith what's wrong?" Buffy asked feeling a tear on her shoulder. Turning around she wraps her arms around Faith. "Please tell me?"

"I can't not yet, maybe not ever, I don't know I am so confused Buffy." Crying Faith wrapped her arms around Buffy and held her tight.

Not sure what to say or what to do Buffy just held Faith tight and let her counterpart cry. She worried about Faith, she worried something was seriously wrong. She had never seen Faith cry, let alone cry with such despair. Cooing softly she waited for the tears to stop, the snuffling to shift to even breathing. She held the woman she loved and felt utter despair that she couldn't' help.


	24. Chapter 24

Faith looked at the monitor and smiled. She was having a baby. It had taken her all of the two weeks to come to grips with the fact that she was pregnant. It didn't matter if the baby ended up looking like Caleb. It didn't matter if the child actually was fathered by Caleb. The baby was hers and she would love her baby with all of her heart. Looking at the monitor she swore she would give her child the life she never had.

"Well Faith everything looks good. I don't see any abnormalities in the ultrasound. We still have to have several blood tests done to confirm everything is okay not only with you but with the baby. Last we need to do a pelvic and cervical exam to make sure your body can handle this pregnancy." Dr. Denise said taking a few pictures and printing them out. Turning off the monitor she wiped down Faith's stomach and took out a gown for Faith to change into. Moving over to the cabinets she took out a syringe and five vials. "Which arm do you prefer?" She asked while washing her hands and putting on a fresh set of gloves.

"The right has a better vein." Faith responded pulling up the sleeve of her shirt.

Dr. Denise smiled then stopped taking a seat and looking at Faith. "Before we continue I wanted to know if you've decided what you would like to do?" She said not mentioning the choice of abortion since it was obvious.

"I'm keeping her." Faith said simply.

Dr. Denise merely nodded her head. It had been rather clear from Faith's facial expression that she was going to keep the baby. Picking up a tourniquet she tied off Faith's upper arm and found a vein. Inserting the needle she took the five vials of blood before giving Faith a bandage. "I'll give you a moment to change and then we can get on with the physical exam." She said getting up and taking the vials of blood with her.

Faith waited for the door to close before getting up and changing into the simple gown again. She made sure to remove her bra and underwear just in case. Hoping back up onto the exam table she laid down and waited for the doctor to return. When she heard the soft knock on the door she called out that she was ready. Dr. Denise entered and in minutes the physical exam was done with several other samples taken.

"Alright Faith" Dr. Denise started as she packed the samples and removed her gloves. "Everything looks good. How have you been feeling?"

"Fine, really fine but I've felt pretty decent throughout all of this so far." Faith said knowing that there was a good chance the rest of the pregnancy wouldn't be as easy. "I haven't gained as much weight as I would have expected and I barely even have a bump." Faith said looking down at her nearly flat stomach.

"Well that will change soon enough. You're at I'd say 14 to 16 weeks along. Pretty soon that little girl is going to make herself known. Have you picked up any of the what to expect books? Do you have any questions?"

"I haven't picked up any of the books but I don't really have any questions right now." Faith said thinking that she would have to review some memories of being pregnant.

"Good, if you do have any questions at any time feel free to call the office or come see me. If you're available I would like to schedule you next appointment for a month from now. Your test results should be in within the week and I'll just give you a call for that. If there is anything wrong with the tests you may have to come in but otherwise you are all set for the next month." Dr. Denise said with a smile. Getting up she shook hands with Faith and reminded her to make her appointment with the receptionist.

Faith watched the doctor leave and couldn't help but have the slightest naughty thought. Dr. Denise was beautiful and even with that lab coat on she was still sexy as all hell. Shaking her head at her thoughts Faith got off the table and got dressed. Stepping out the exam room she went to the receptionist, made her appointment, and left the building.

Driving back to the apartment she wondered what her next step should be. The obvious was to begin by buying baby clothes and furniture. Then came the consideration that the school or its dormitories might be finished before the baby arrived. The school was amazingly enough ahead of schedule at the moment but she knew without a doubt that something would happen to delay opening day. The dormitories wouldn't be finished before the school since they hadn't even finished designing them. There was some consideration to hiring a separate contractor to build the dormitories so that the dorms could be opened near the same time as the school. However, those thoughts were still in their prime.

Releasing a sigh of mild frustration Faith pulled up in front of the apartment building and went straight to her apartment. She knew that she needed to inform everyone. Beyond the fact that soon she would be showing and that her condition would be obvious she believed they had a right to know. She was the chosen head mistress of the school and she might not be able to fulfill her duties.

Entering her apartment Faith mildly wished that she had taken the time to buy more than just the basics. Her apartment was rather Spartan. In her living room there was just the couch, entertainment unit with the television and a coffee table, along with a few end tables and lamps. The kitchen consisted of an island that acted as a table more often than not. She had four stools for the rare occasion she had company. Overall the apartment was relatively empty but serviceable. She figured it would be easier to buy any other furniture and knick knacks once they moved into the dormitories.

Picking up the phone Faith called Giles, Willow, Kennedy, Xander, Anya, Dawn, and Buffy. She wanted to tell everyone Originals first. Though the title didn't include Kennedy, as Willow's girlfriend she was included in priority information before everyone else. Faith figured it was a good way of telling the new slayers in the process. Kennedy for all her glory wasn't the best person to tell anything secret to. She was still young and more than eager to prove she was better than the other girls by spilling information.

Finishing the last call Faith walked over to the door and left it ajar in silent invitation for everyone just to come in without knocking. Moving into the kitchen she took out a couple of waters, soda, and two bottles of wine, one white and one red. She was glad she kept her fridge well stocked with a variety of drinks. Setting up glasses she wasn't surprised to see Dawn walk in and move straight into the kitchen.

"I'm guessing you are calling everyone to tell them your news?" Dawn asked moving to the cabinet and taking out the wine glasses. She smiled at the fact that Faith took the time to buy wine glasses. It was so incongruent with the old Faith.

"Yes though I am glad you came first. I wanted to tell you before the rest that I've decided to keep the baby." Faith said feeling a sense of relief at saying the words aloud.

"I'm glad." Dawn stated simply.

"Really? I hadn't thought you would be. You've been incredibly hard to read on the topic." Faith said finishing setting out the glasses and looking at Dawn.

"I didn't want to influence your decision. I can't know what it's like to be in your position. I will be honest that I never hope to be in your position. I didn't want to condemn you for deciding to abort that baby because I can never understand what it is like to be raped. I can't understand what it's like to find out your pregnant by your rapist." Dawn said lowering her voice in case anyone walked in.

"You think it's Caleb's as well huh?"

"It would be foolish to disregard the possibility." Dawn looked at Faith sadly.

"Dawn sometimes you surprise me with your maturity. Why are you glad I'm keeping the baby?" Faith asked glad to see some reaction from Dawn.

"I think it would kill you a little to abort that child. You have always been so full of life Faith, so full of emotion. I think this child will be special and that you will love this baby with all of your heart. You deserve some happiness after everything that has happened to you. I am glad that this child can be a turning point for you. I know what you are afraid of and I can try to understand. I know you are afraid of becoming like your mother. But I know, I know with my entire being, that you will never be like your mother. You will never hurt this child. You will never abuse or neglect this child. It doesn't matter who it's father is, the only thing that does matter is that you will love this baby more than anyone else in the world." Dawn said wiping away a stray tear from Faith's eyes.

Grabbing Dawn into a hug Faith did her best to contain her tears. She hadn't realized how much she needed the confirmation that she was nothing like her mother. "Thank you Dawn. I don't know what I would do without you." She said emphatically before pulling away.

"Are we interrupting something?" Kennedy asked with a little smile.

Dawn and Faith turned to see Kennedy walking into the kitchen with Willow not far behind.

"No you aren't Ken." Faith said simply. "Do you want something to drink?"

"I'll take a Coke." Kennedy said walking up to the island and grabbing a can. Popping the top she took a sip and smiled in thanks.

"Anything for you Willow?" Dawn asked motioning towards the large selection.

"I think we can all serve ourselves Dawnie." Willow said picking up a wine glass and pouring out a healthy dose of white wine.

Grabbing a water Faith pulled one of the bar stools into the living room and took a seat. She wasn't surprised to see Dawn pull a stool next to hers. She was glad for the show of solidarity. She knew she would need the bit of courage in order to tell everyone.

"Hey Faith why the meeting?" Xander asked walking into the apartment with Anya and Buffy.

"I'll tell you all once you all get a drink and take a seat." Faith said unwilling to start the big talk any sooner than necessary.

Giles was the last to walk in and shut the door behind him. Faith gave the older man a smile and wished she had thought to make tea. Personally she wasn't a big tea drinker and only kept a bit of Earl Grey in case Giles happened to stop by for a talk. Their talks weren't often but the two had, had a few over the last couple of weeks settling out some of their differences. There was a tentative trust between them.

Looking at everyone Faith wondered how she would tell everyone such a life altering event. Taking a deep breath she considered her options. "I'm pregnant." She stated simply seeing no other way to get to the topic. She could go on and on about her recent mood swings, fatigue, and lack of slaying but that seemed pointless since she really wasn't involved with any one individual person. Those hints would have been great if she had been talking to her lover instead of a group of friends.

"You're what?" Xander asked first his face showing utter confusion.

"I'm pregnant." Faith stated again thinking Xander looked as if the baby was his. His look was so genuine confusion she expected him to blurt out 'is it mine?' at any moment.

"Are you sure?" Giles asked seriously.

Taking out the ultrasound pictures she laid them on the coffee table for anyone to see. One by one the group converged on the table to look at the photos. Pulling out the best one she handed it to Dawn. It was the best profile of the little nut growing inside her.

"That's pretty sure G-man." Xander piped up feeling the need to break the sudden silence.

"How far along?" Giles asked his face sad.

"Fourteen to sixteen weeks depending on how you look at it. The doc thinks sixteen but she is counting from the day of my last period. I say fourteen because I know the day of conception." Faith responds her face as emotionless as possible.

"I see" Giles says pausing to gather his thoughts. "I don't want to be the one to ask this but clearly I have to." He paused again. "Have you scheduled a date to terminate it." He asked the last part softly as if it hurt to say the words.

"What?" Buffy asked shocked at the idea. "Why would she terminate?"

"Buffy you know she has no choice. We were all there that night. We all heard what he said. We all know what that child could be." Giles said looking at Faith's stomach.

"So what? That doesn't mean we have to terminate." Buffy stated standing up and moving closer to Faith. "That child is innocent."

"And that child could be the incarnation of the First." Giles stated emphatically. "She knows when that child was conceived. She knows who it's Father is. She knows she cannot bring that child forth into this world." He said standing up and looking at Faith for confirmation.

"Giles stop." Willow said getting up and moving towards the older man. "We don't know any such thing. Even if that child is Caleb's there is still a chance that the child will be good."

"Is that a chance you want to take?" Xander asked looking at Willow. "We lost a lot of good innocent people that day. We lost friends. Do you want the First coming back in human form? Do you want another war? Do you want to risk the lives of hundreds just on the off chance that she might not be carrying Satan?"

"I'm keeping my baby."

"That is **Enough** Xander." Dawn said frowning.

"Is it?" He asked looking bemused

"It is. None of you have taken even a second to consider that this is Faith's child and Faith's body." Dawn stated simply.

"It may be her body and her child but don't we have a say?" Xander asked outraged.

"No you don't, none of us do. I am beyond sure that there are several laws passed not only by the state but by the supreme court that says she has control of her own body. Do any of you remember Roe vs. Wade?" Dawn asked looking at Xander as if he had lost his mind.

"Xander stop being an idiot." Anya said smacking Xander on the arm. "It's Faith's body and her choice. We can deal with whatever happens. If she gives birth to a reincarnation of the First than we will deal with it."

"I'm keeping my baby."

"Anya's right Xander. It is Faith's body and she does have the right to keep or abort." Kennedy said refraining from saying pregnancy or baby along with words like termination and abortion.

"Yeah but if it affects all of us I think we should be able to voice our thoughts." Xander pointed out.

"Yes Xander you can voice your thoughts but you have no right to tell me what I should do. This is my baby and I am keeping it." Faith said simply brooking no argument.

"How can you be willing to do this to us Faith? To the world?" Giles asked befuddled.

"Giles this is my child." Faith stated as if that explained everything.

Looking at Faith, Giles stopped. He saw the sadness in the younger woman's eyes. He didn't think he would have the fortitude or the courage to raise the child of the man who had violated him. It was a perspective he rarely took. Faith had gone through hell in some very literal terms and he could see that losing the child she carried would be the end for her. It would be losing yet another part of herself. "Anya is right Xander, we can deal with whatever happens as it happens."

Throwing his hands up in the air Xander looked at the group as if they had all lost their minds. Anya merely patted him on the shoulder. She couldn't help but smile at how dramatic he could be over things he had no control over.

"So really this meeting was just for the purpose of telling you that I am pregnant and that I am keeping this child. I would like your support, I know I will need it." Faith said knowing how hard it would be having a baby by herself.

"We are here for you Faith and we will help as much as we can." Buffy stated emphatically.

Smiling at Buffy, Faith wiped away the slight wetness at the corner of her eyes. The meeting had gone somewhat along the lines she had expected. Thankfully it had ended better than she had expected. The group was willing as a whole to accept her child.

Looking at Buffy, Faith wondered if they still had a chance at something more. She had expected Buffy to hate the idea of her being pregnant. She had expected Buffy to demand termination. She was surprised and happily so. It helped to prove that Buffy did care about her.


End file.
